Covid Saved My Marriage

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Covid Saved My Marriage

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Before covid hit my marriage was in big trouble, after years of sitting on "little" problems and ignoring relatively big issues I got tired of living complacently. My husband and I were essentially living a lie, we lived and acted like we were the picture-perfect couple living a perfectly happy life. In the summer of 2019, a tiny issue finally broke the camel's back and we separated. A few months into our separation divorce papers were drawn out and signed by me, he was in Arizona and I had moved in with my parents and children in California. By January 2020 we had already begun hearing about covid but we still didn't think much of it since it was an issue halfway across the globe. All signed and ready to file for divorce we got hit with a quarantine order in California. My husband asked me to move back home so he can be with our kids since we didn't know how long quarantine would last. I agreed and he drove to pick us up. Living together was odd, especially because we had both gotten used to being without one another. After thirteen years of being together, the separation made us realize we hardly knew each other. We had to try extra hard to get along in front of the kids and at least be cordial with one another. Our state of amicability turned into an odd level of friendship. Six months later he asked if I would consider therapy. I agreed and we started therapy virtually. Things got worse in therapy before they got better (as expected) but the divorce papers were eventually torn up. A year later, I can't say were picture-perfect but I can say that we're happy in this phase were in. Since there was a palpable sense of fear last March, we were forced to think about the reality of life without one another, how would we cope with life/death issues alone, and whether we truly wanted that? Quarantine forced us to face years of issues that had seeped into the foundation of our relationship. Divorce would have been much easier, but this outcome we are living in today is so worth it. In short, I'd say covid saved my marriage.

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