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anxiety
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0020-05-07
The Life of Sydney Harris
My mental health had a lot of time to be at peace for a while and learn about myself. My anxiety felt calm and my depression was almost lost. Depression is a life long issue but without school I was the happiest and freest I had been in a long time. -
2020-11-03
Election Night 2020
This poem sits at the nexus of pandemic life and political desperation. My wife lost multiple elderly family members to COVID because her parents believed the rhetoric spread by Donald Trump and those like him. Five years of dealing with racist, sexist, homophobic and transphobic bigotry being the political norm, and eight months of a pandemic in the heart of one of the largest science denying states in the country led to this moment of desperation, where all I could do was blindly bake and write to get the nervous energy out. -
2021-07-23
Mental Health And Remote Work: Survey Reveals 80% Of Workers Would Quit Their Jobs For This
Teleworkers during the pandemic have experienced mental health challenges. For some individuals, working from home during the pandemic has increased their anxiety and stress levels. They have found it difficult to unplug from work, work longer hours at home than they did in the office, and struggle with the lack of social interaction. This article discusses ways that employers can support their employees and address their mental health struggles. -
2021-07-06
The Year the World Turned Upside Down
In the year of COVID-19, I did not want to leave my house. I was already an anxious person before COVID-19, so I was scared out of my mind when it hit. A lot of people do not talk about the mental effect that COVID-19 has had on teenagers. COVID-19 happened at the end of my sophomore year. Before COVID-19, I was such an outgoing person, and now I feel like I do not know how to talk to people without overthinking. My junior year of doing mostly virtual has crippled me in a way that few can understand. My social battery has never seemed to recover, and my anxiety is always on ten whenever I go out in public. It feels like during this pandemic, I have lost a part of me that I may never get back. I now struggle with talking to people and making friends at my new school. I was so stuck in my head during the pandemic, and now I do not know how to get out. I recognize my privilege in never getting COVID-19 and no one close to me dying. I just wanted to acknowledge the effects of COVID-19 on my mental health. I hope that I can work through the issues this pandemic has caused me and get to a better place mentally. -
2021-06-02
COVID 19: An Influence for Positivity
The text document describes how COVID gave me an opportunity to reinvent myself. The live recreation of a famous meme is an example of how I tapped into my creativity, living a more fulfilling life -
2021-06-28
My Pandemic Experience
When the pandemic was coming, I was initially relieved. I was supposed to fly to Chicago to visit my sister and go to our favorite band’s (Keane) concert, but as a person with anxiety and panic disorder who is terrified of airplanes and crowds it allowed me to back out. The concert was cancelled. It was the excuse I needed to back out without shame or blame. It seems silly now, but at the time covid seemed more like a bad cold or flu to me. It seemed like another Swine Flu or Avian Flu or other scare in recent memory which hadn’t amounted to a plague style pandemic. Lockdown was even kind of nice at first. My husband, daughter, and I got to spend a lot of family time together. I had taught ESL online for a number of years previously, so converting my in school classes to online was easy. I had no problems teaching over Zoom. I’m a homebody anyway, by habit and by anxiety, so this was great… until the body count started. I was horrified and sickened to hear about the freezer containers being used in New York City to store the overflow of bodies. The germaphobia that had plagued me in childhood, that I had gone to years of therapy to overcome, came roaring back with a vengeance. Like everyone else, I went to the grocery store to stock up so I wouldn’t have to leave me house for awhile, only to find shelf after shelf empty. As a super health conscious, organic, vegan my choices were extremely limited. My husband and daughter aren’t vegan, but they do eat only organic, which became impossible. Soap, disinfectant, cleaners, and hand sanitizers were nowhere to be found. At a time when it was so important to be as clean and healthy as possible all those modern conveniences were utterly gone. I felt helpless. I imagined that people living during pandemics like the bubonic plague and Spanish flu must have felt similarly. After a couple of weeks, quarantine started to feel more like a claustrophobic prison sentence than a family vacation. I missed my sister, my parents, my friends, my colleagues, and my students. On my birthday and Easter I just had to wave at my parents through the glass door. My favorite hobby- taekwondo, which I had started in order to relieve stress and help with my anxiety was taken from me. I had to do the classes online from my living room, which was nearly impossible. I felt trapped. A raging epidemic across the planet from which there was no escape. If I spent too much time thinking about it, I would start to feel the claw of panic. By the time summer arrived I was at breaking point. Luckily with summer we had some reprieve. Case loads declined, and I started meeting my best friend outside. We socially distanced ourselves and wore masks, but we were together and that was a start. By the end of summer she and her boyfriend were on our “quaranteam” that is we decided we could see each other since we weren’t seeing anyone else. In the fall school started. Since I teach at a Catholic school we were able to have school in person full time, though we had students in every grade who opted to go remote. But my bestie and I were back in the building with most of the kids, and I started to feel less trapped. I was going to stores masked and my daughter was also in school. But as soon as Thanksgiving hit everything changed again. So many people ignored all of the recommendations and restrictions and got together with family and friends. It made me so angry that people were so careless. A friend of mine had a large family in Pennsylvania who all got together for Thanksgiving. She didn’t go because she thought it was reckless. 8 out of 14 people at the family dinner got covid and 2 of them died. Then at Christmas, my great uncle passed. No funeral. No wake. Nothing. Schools shut down again. We were trapped. Then the vaccines came. It was nearly impossible to get one for a long time even if you were eligible. Slots filled as fast as they were posted. You needed to present a lot of proof of eligibility in order to get one. As a teacher, I was able to get mine earlier than many others. I got the Moderna. The first shot made me feel a little sick for a few hours, but with the second I had a fever of 103.5, aches, chills, nausea for 12 hours and a general malaise for 3 days. A friend of mine in taekwondo, who has some autoimmune problems, had a severe reaction after her first Moderna vaccine. She has had side effects for a few months now that are not going away. She has dizzy spells and heart palpitations regularly. She is undergoing testing and being monitored by the CDC. Despite some horror stories, the vaccine is still the absolute best thing that we could have hoped for. I would like my daughter to get it as soon as they open it to the under 12 population. A lot of people won’t get the vaccine because they are in the “Science is fake, I’m a Trump supporter” camp. In my opinion, Trump’s misinformation and mishandling of the pandemic cost tens of thousands of American lives, and his diversive legacy is going to cost us dearly for many years to come. It is now June again. School just finished. New York State is allowing people to enter buildings unmasked if they are vaccinated, but few people are actually requiring any proof. Given that the people with a cavalier attitude toward wearing masks are many of the same people who are against getting vaccinated, an honors system policy towards wearing masks is really just a no-mask policy. It is very frustrating to me that people can’t just deal with masks for a while longer to fully insure this disease’s eradication before we have another relapse and find ourselves back in quarantine again. -
2020-11-24
Human–dog relationships during the COVID-19 pandemic
A study done in Israel looks at the relationship between humans and dogs during the pandemic. The study finds that, like in the United States, there was a significant increase in dog adoptions in Israel during the pandemic. They also found a direct correlation between the mental health of the owner and the perceived quality of the life of the dog. -
2021-06-19
Pet Adoption Comic NPR
This comic is fun, engaging, and informative. It talks about the increase in pet adoption during the pandemic and how pets helped a lot of people deal with emotional trauma. It cautions would-be pet owners not to jump blindly into adopting and to think about what will happen when life returns to normal. Separation anxiety can be difficult for pets to deal with, and owners need to have a plan for that. -
2021-06-13
COVID and My Mental State
I've never really felt like this before COVID, maybe at times but not as frequent. COVID has been a whole different experiences for me in many ways. I've never really felt so helpless even until now. Having nothing to do or being stuck at home, it took a toll on me. Many of the things I had a passion for or loved doing has made me lose motivation. I have been also slacking on my studies. COVID has also made me realized that I have no friends or personal relations outside of my family. Not going outside as also made me get terrible anxiety and talking to people has been difficult. But I have been working on it as of recently and working on myself little by little every day. -
2021-06-04
Truth during our COVID PANDEMIC
Through this Pandemic, I personally had to mature past the age I currently am. Now having to take on such a huge responsibility to be safe and avoid as many people as possible, it really took a toll on my social skills. Especially for someone who had problems with anxiety, I found some peace and salvation being around and talking with the people I liked. now having to avoid them? Well, that was one big change. Although it was hard at first, I encourage whoever sees and reads this to embrace change and curve it to your steering. After all, I overcame my anxiety through this quarantine. Some people may say COVID has affected them in ways they may not recover from but I just assume that it is all adults speaking. I have grown as a person and have actually realized the small little injustices that happened to students and the misleading nature of the "system'. At this time, this era, highlights of racial acts have now shown itself as if you sprayed insects with raid pesticide. Surprisingly, it was more common in Police Departments believe it or not. The people who swore to protect and serve justice were the ones who were at the epicenter of injustice. Schools no longer served students but rather misled them into thinking they were being helped. The first I would love to emphasize on is the fact that nothing they simply teach us in school relates to anyone's lifestyle. Sure if you went the technical route to want a specific occupation it was helpful, but other than that, it was absolutely useless. As a straight A student, I found myself in "unknown" territory when I was outside of school. Nothing of what we were taught is to be put in use. We don't solve x to make a U turn, we don't need to do an entire analysis on a red stop light to know that it says stop and we certainly didn't need to know that the rocks that we kick on our walks to home are sedimentary rock or igneous rocks. The education system is flawed in helping individuals learn what they need to know. Handing out 7 different subjects when your goal is to be a computer engineer? that doesn't seem right does it? I'm sure you said yes and you are now beginning to see my point. A few months back, February 14, 2021, information was leaked on the edu system. These tests that they give us, these regents and state exams.. it's all a cover up to their hunger for money. They lie to us that our performance on the tests dictates whether or not we pass but that's not the case. It actually dictates how well the school is funded and how much the teachers are paid. YOUR TESTS.. they aren't doing anything for you. The better you perform, the central host that funds schools, uses that information and says "oh wait.. this school performed well. Lets fund them more and pay the teachers better for their *HARD WORK*" These things don't help us. That is why America Continues to see their homeless individual growth rate increase every year. The people are conditioned to do good on selecting a, b , c or d but have no idea how to get a job, do their taxes, get a business loan in real life!!.This problematic system needed to be changed and for my time, it won't. I hope that someone in the future sees this and does a comparison and contrasts on how things have changed or if it has even changed at all. I apologize for the long rant on school at this time, it's just at the center of all the youths' problems currently. Back on track to injustices here present. If we were to take a step back and really look at the racial events partaking currently, we begin to see how one of the most notorious orgs that stands against racism is to be considered a terrorist org. That is the BLM foundation. Now you may have thought that they do good, but I assure you it isn't what it seems. Let's first analyze what makes an organization a terrorist foundation. 1) The people sway from the cause and place the blame on someone else 2) propaganda is at the forefront of the organization 3) they destroy and hurt lives more than they help. Let's compare al Queda to BLM. al queda, the organization that was behind the 9/11 incident is no less different from BLM. 1) Al Queda sole purpose was to send a message to the US saying that they will fight back at any US involvement in the Middle east. They swayed from that and blamed all their actions on the US including the beheading of innocents and the raping of innocent women. They blamed the US even though the US was not present in the Middle east. BLM was to stand and say that there is injustice to black lives but they swayed and pinned all their problems on the White people. 2) Al queda said they were to bring peace for the people they represented but they instead lied and used those peoples as their weapons. The BLM founder used all the funds to make a large property investment. 3) al Queda, destroyed buildings and hurt the innocent. BLM riot's and protests, destroyed small business, beat and killed innocent bystanders, robbed stores, robbed innocents of all their belongings, destroyed any from of mobile property and most importantly, went against peaceful protests and went against the law. BLM representatives also took part in Black on Asian crime. This is to evaluate the fact that COVID was not only a small problem but helped highlight the true concept of humanity and it's injustice that went on in the darkness. In many ways COVID 19 was bad indeed but in high alert, it showed us what people really are when the light is shined on them. -
2020-07-10
Emotional Dam and Educational Fall out
This shows that before the pandemic, I struggled to get the help I needed to deal with my stress, and the minute everything got shut down, so did I. I ended up not knowing what to do and failed my classes and explained to my family that I've had depression and anxiety issues. Im currently still trying to recover, and it truly feels like my college doesn't care because they take forever to respond, knowing I'm in danger of failing and having some personal struggles. -
2021-05-18
Zach Pfalzgraf's Pandemic Story
Never in my life would I have thought that we would be facing a pandemic this big with all the modern technology we have. I was sure surprised and arrogant to think such as everyone can obviously tell. When the pandemic started, I was a junior at the University of Texas at the Permian Basin. The university is located in my hometown of Odessa, Texas. While attending there, I was also a full-time worker at a supermarket across the street from the university. One moment, we had shelves fully stocked and the next moment we had shelves completely bare because of people panic buying. Due to the people panic buying, my family and I panicked as well because we needed to get things like everyone else. Even when we had the things we needed, just because I worked in that supermarket and had to see it every day, I still wasn't really ever able to shake the feeling of anxiety and fear of what would happen to the supply routes the truckers use. It was a mess that I think no one had the answers for in the beginning. However, when public officials said to mask up and kept us up to date on the information they had, that's when we started to have our questions answered. Nonetheless, there were still some who denied this information that also included some ranks within our public officials that I think should have faced some sort of consequence in the long run. I got vaccinated with the Johnson vaccine once my phase of vaccine distribution came up and I still made sure to wear a mask for a great while to keep myself and others safe. This is an experience that I am sure we can all collectively agree on not wanting to repeat. -
2020-03-29
Paranoia to Peace
I struggled with anxiety around the time the news said there was a pandemic going on, and I healed as time went on and the world around me played a part in that. -
2021-04-23
The COVID-19 Pandemic From An Introverts Point of View
The global pandemic that started in 2020 has been extremely hard on a lot of people, especially extroverted people that need social interaction to feel normal. I feel I am incredibly lucky in this regard as I enjoy my solitude without the hustle and bustle of social activities. When the pandemic started back in March 2020 and we all were advised to stay inside to help combat the virus it was the easiest task in the world for me. I personally practice social distancing in general since I don’t enjoy people being in my personal bubble and I also dislike being around large groups due to personal anxiety. So overall when this all started, I honestly did not notice a big change in my life. One thing I did notice was that people in my phone and on my friends lists through various platforms were suddenly super active in their messages being sent to me. I can empathize with others in this regard because even introverted people like to engage in social activities every now and then. Another big thing I noticed was all my favorite software got major updates and were revamped due to so many people now working from home many companies actually saw their productivity explode in 2020 while wonderful it is very sad to see companies not giving their workers more options to work from home now in 2021 despite seeing boosted productivity. I was also able to go shopping for groceries with less crowds which to me was a nice thing to not be surrounded by so many people as I would be in any other situation. I also really like wearing masks when its cold out because it keeps your face from being hit by harsh cold winds and you kind of feel like a Mortal Kombat character. Now that things are getting a bit more under control with more vaccines out in the public space and people going back to work, I hope people who need to socialize get the chance to do so. I will also remember 2020 because so many people globally did not live to see 2021, I feel fortunate that my family and I made it through 2020 in one piece. -
2020-04-13
My first mask
This is a photo of the first mask I bought/used when the pandemic began. I bought this mask a few months into the pandemic however, as I didn't feel comfortable leaving my house in the early days, I think I bought this around April 2020 if I'm not mistaken. I remember I was at Wal-Mart as my dad told me that they were selling masks there, at the time there was a shortage of masks and people were panic buying. I remember stores were packed, and people were almost exclusively buying toilet paper - I seriously think that's probably the weirdest part of the pandemic, people were also scalping toilet paper on Facebook marketplace, it was like a secondary currency (Not really but it was a precious resource apparently). They were selling masks at the register, in plastic bags for $1.49 I think; in all honesty I think I would of been better off not buying the mask but the atmosphere of panic kind of made me feel like an idiot for not having a mask. When I opened it up in my car I realized it was literally just a cut up black T-shirt; it was transparent, it didn't wrap around your face, it just hung there. Me being an idiot, I used it for a good solid month, it's a miracle I didn't catch COVID-19. I can't believe that they would sell that to people in Wal-Mart, I mean I think I was one of the only people who bought one so I can't be too upset; but still, people were desperate for any semblance of protection, and such a mega-corp like Wal-Mart felt fine profiting off of those anxieties. I'm not trying to insinuate that they should care, because they didn't get rich by being ethical. -
2020-11
Comparing the Impact of COVID-19-Related Social Distancing on Mood and Psychiatric Indicators in Sexual and Gender Minority (SGM) and Non-SGM Individuals
"There has been direct correlation with mental health disparities and sexual and gender minority (SGM) compared with cisgender heterosexual individuals. SGM members report having elevatedrates of emotional distress, symptoms related to mood and anxiety disorders, self-harm, and suicidal ideation and behavior. Social support is inversely related to psychiatric symptoms, regardless of SGM status. The COVID-19 pandemic—with its associated limited social interactions—represents an unprecedented period of acute distress with potential reductions in accessibility of social support, which might be of particular concern for SGM individuals' mental well-being. In the present study, we explored the extent to which potential changes in mental health outcomes (depressive symptoms, worry, perceived stress, positive and negative affect) throughout the duration of the pandemic were related to differences in perceptions of social support and engagement in virtual social activity, as a function of SGM status. "-Front Psychiatry. 2020; 11: 590318. Published online 2020 Dec 22. doi: 10.3389/fpsyt.2020.590318 -
2021-04-08
How does the pandemic affect children?
This article titled "Coming of Age" is a great article that provides various art pieces from children all around the world. Who, through their art display the feelings they feel during the pandemic, certain stepping stones of their life that they were unable to celebrate fully, and even self-development that was limited. More can be said about the article by looking at the images provided and the unique descriptions below them. -
2021-04-05
Online Article: Law enforcement officers need to be proactive in self-care to ensure they are resilient in the midst of loss and trauma
This article discusses guidance for law enforcement professionals to adopt better self-care practices through this pandemic and the increased volume of vicarious trauma, depression, anxiety, and suffering prevalent in our societies. The author specifically addresses the problem of police suicide, which is often committed at similar rates to military combat veterans. While the article's content helps officers potentially deal with the difficulties of their calling, it might also help the public better recognize the darker and unwelcome realities of police work. -
2021-03-21
How does the pandemic affect children?
This is an article that provides an inside on taking care of a newborn during the pandemic. -
03/14/2021
Layne Williams Oral History, 2021/03/14
Layne Williams is a Physical Therapist Assistant who was working in a hospital during the pandemic. Her role shifted during the early months of the pandemic and she found herself doing any job that was needed to help with the increased numbers of patients coming into the hospital. She recalled the surreal feeling of walking into her first Covid positive patient’s room and how the mentality of healthcare providers shifted as more information came out about Covid. She also discussed the challenges of being a healthcare provider while living with her husband who is not in healthcare. Her job certainly exposed her to increased risks and those risks spilled over to impact her home life. However, her overall impression from the pandemic is that it showed what the healthcare field is capable of achieving when challenged. -
2021-03-17
Opening Early Meme
As more and more vaccines are being given, it seems that soon we may be able to slowly begin returning back to normal. However, with mask mandates and restrictions falling off early across the United States, I remain fearful that we may experience another wave/peak. This meme demonstrates that anxiety. -
2021
The year that was, pandemic and my mental journey
I live in Cleveland, Ohio. I grew up an hour away in Ashtabula, Oh. My fiancé and I went to a concert they day before everything else closed down. We had no clue it would be the lass mass gathering we would go to in over a year. We moved during the summer and that kept us going. However, after being in lock down and not being able to see our friends and family began to make things harder. We all know the tole that covid has played on physical health but mental health is something the news hardly covers. We have young nephews that we couldn't see. My dad turned 60 this summer and we couldn't have a big party. Summer passed and fall came we thought maybe we can get together for Thanksgiving. Then well if we skip Thanksgiving we can have a family Christmas. That would not be the case. My sister and brother in law had a big family Thanksgiving with his family and they all ended up getting covid. They were around my dad and he got sick. Christmas was a no go. I was worried about my grandma who was 84. It is now March 2021 and we are "remembering" the last year. People without anxiety are feeling the mental affects of a year were we were not able to have parties, gatherings, weddings, and even funerals to remember the lives lived and lost. It is hard not seeing the friends and families that we took for granted before covid. We all need to take a moment, and take a deep breath. Check in with our mental wellbeing. It has been a long year. -
03/12/2021
Anonymous Marine Oral History, 2021/03/12
Interview with a Marine that details going through Basic Training during COVID-19. -
2021-02-28
#JOTPYLesson from Amanda Lehew
I have learned to be more positive about my mental health. Before the pandemic, I was having uncontrollable panic attacks, and when everything went down it made me realize, I was not alone. @Ronway_Twitty @JakeSilbersack @JeremyZitnik @EGonzaba @ReelVisualProd -
2021-02-27
Anonymous Oral History, 2021/02/27
An anonymous Bronx mother tells the story of her two daughters’ mental health challenges during the pandemic. First, her 21 year old daughter had a Covid-related panic attack in May 2020 that required 4 weeks of hospitalization. This daughter was on the road to recovery when her 24 year old daughter fell into a severe depression in August. The mother describes how this situation affected her entire family and how both daughters returned to mental health even though the pandemic hasn’t ended yet. -
2021-02-14
My Story: I Got COVID-19 Because of ICE
I am sending a diary style writing where I share my experience during the pandemic. I focus on the issue of ICE during the pandemic. Before the lockdowns, my uncle was detained by ICE and was deported during the pandemic. My uncle has been living in the US for 25+ years and Mexico, my uncle's home country, has changed a lot since he last lived there. For that reason, I went to Mexico to take him home. This made me get COVID. -
2021-02-24
The Coronavirus Affects Everyone
I know that the Coronavirus has impacted everyone’s lives in their own way. However, I never thought that Coronavirus would impact my family and me in the way that it has. My dad was a very healthy, active person with a strong immune system who hardly ever got sick. Then, one night out of the blue, he got a high fever and body aches. My mom and I assumed it was just the flu and that it would pass. Although after a week of him being sick, he began having severe breathing problems and the ambulance came to take him to the hospital where he was later admitted that night. Due to high precautions, the hospital wasn’t allowing any visitors, and we couldn’t even send cards or flowers. After a few days, we heard from the doctor that he tested positive for Covid-19. It was an absolute shock. My mind was in shambles and I couldn’t grasp the reality of what was happening. They started him on an experimental treatment immediately. Unfortunately, my dad was always too weak to talk on the phone or text, so we barely had any contact with him and only got information once every afternoon when the doctors called with an update. We patiently waited torturous weeks to hopefully hear of some recovery, but the treatment exhibited no improvement and his oxygen levels continued to decline. Then, on April 6th, we got a call from the hospital saying that his inflammation levels in his lungs were rapidly rising and the medications weren’t helping. They were going to put him on a ventilator, but the doctors didn’t seem hopeful that he would be able to come off it. They gave us his hospital room phone number so we could talk to him and give him any hope we had to offer. From the very few words we got out of him during the call, he told me that he was in pain and no matter how hard he tried to get his body to fight back, the virus was just too strong. That was easily the hardest day of my life. I felt like I was going to lose my dad forever without having the chance to say goodbye. Having to comprehend the fact that I may never get to see or hug my dad was absolutely heart-wrenching. Suddenly, after weeks of prayers and different medications, his body was finally responding to the treatment. The feeling I felt when I heard those words was something I couldn’t and cannot explain. Within about a week, his fever went down, and his lungs were starting to heal. It was a miracle. We couldn’t believe how quickly he was progressing. The doctors did one final Covid-19 test, and he finally came back negative. Soon after that, he was discharged and finished recovering at home. Currently, he seems to be doing much better, but he still has a long road of recovery ahead. -
2020-03-18
Covid in Jax
Covid took away the freedom to hangout with friends. -
2021-02-17
Vaccination Blues
My homeland, Orange County, has not been a place to be very proud of during COVID-19. Between anti-maskers, inept leadership, lack of transparency, and inequity in access to both COVID-19 testing and vaccines, this year has been a roller coaster in our little coastal chunk of CA. The vaccine roll out has been a massive headache. For the past month on Instagram, I see post after post of people younger than I who are getting their vaccinations because they live in another part of the state or country, while locally it's only health care workers I know that have been able to be vaccinated. Although other parts of CA (and the country) have begun to vaccinate teachers and food workers, Orange County is stubbornly (as I was told in a meeting today) waiting until 50% of the over 65 population is vaccinated before they open it up to the next tier. Though this causes me endless anxiety - will I be able to get a vaccine before my high school of 2500 opens for in person instruction - the one relief of the week was that my 65 year old mother was FINALLY able to get a vaccination appointment. The Othena system is a joke - she tried numerous times and couldn't get an appointment for the supposed super pods. Kaiser is still only vaccinating 75+! The Nextdoor app clued us in that a local hospital (where my mom has her insurance) was starting to vaccinate. Despite logging on in the very beginning of February, the earliest appointment she could get is for March 3. She took it, but I wanted to keep searching, because I worry that if the next Tier opens, she may have trouble getting a second shot if she waits until March 3. Nextdoor again clued me in to Rite-Aid, where a friend of my mom's outside OC got her vaccine. Best part - you go directly through Rite Aid, so no Othena! Success! My mom made her appointment on Saturday for tomorrow. We were jubilant! I told both my best friends about the Rite Aid trick, and within three days, they had their elderly family members signed up. Today, an hour after my best friend texted me that her dad got his Rite Aid vaccine, my mom sent me her cancellation message. Apparently the current winter storms have delayed the arrival of vaccines. My mom got lucky again, because it turns out that our school district is vaccinating employees 65+. Though retired, because she is a part time employee, my mom received an invitation today. Once she got the Rite Aid cancellation, she made her an appointment with the school district. Tomorrow is the first day the school district is vaccinating, so we have no idea what to expect, and are a little nervous because her insurance is not one of the carriers of the school district. Fingers crossed that she can still get it! Though I am genuinely happy for everyone getting vaccinated, it is frustrating that it is so much work here to try and get one. Using the Othena site hasn't worked for anyone I know - everyone I know has been vaccinated through their work or somewhere like Rite Aid. Honestly, if I see another post of someone with their vaccination card with a "do your part!" message I am going to throw my phone at the wall. I do want to do my part, if only Orange County would get their act together and manage this whole roll out better. Come on Orange County, you can do better. -
2021-02-17
Living Like An Immunocompromised Person
I have been living in fear of getting others sick rather than what will happen if I were to be the one to get sick. My FAMILY MEMBER is immunocompromised, so I have spent most of 2020 in my house. I have not been scared of coming back positive because I have had cousins who have been sick but have had no real issues. The reason I have lived a full year with fear and anxiety is the idea of giving the disease to my Diabetic FAMILY MEMBER. Part of the reason I came back to campus when the semester started was to get away from my FAMILY MEMBER and the fear that I could be the one to kill THEM. Coronavirus has made this past year one full of fear, but the main character of my fear, meaning my FAMILY MEMBER, has talked me into feeling comfortable enough to return to college. I knew people who had impaired immune systems had to watch what they did even before Covid-19 came into the picture. These days, immunocompromised individuals can barely leave their houses so I have followed the actions of my FAMILY MEMBER. If THEY has felt comfortable enough to return to teaching for middle schoolers and working at a camp with young children who were just learning to wear masks during the summer then I can go live on campus. I actually have a close friend in my dorm family unit who keeps me in check. My FAMILY MEMBER and my friend do a great job but sometimes, I think I stay home and away from people more than some individuals I know with compromised immune systems or pre-existing conditions that put them at risk of dying from the disease. That thought will not dissuade me from continuing with my partially-quarantined lifestyle. I am confused and hurt by those who have not even tried to protect others or change anything in their daily life. With the numbers that are currently being released in the United States and at my college, I will keep living in a way that will not increase my anxiety or the chance of my fears coming true. If my college continues to see rising positive cases, I hope we get put into a full campus lockdown or I have a little warning of being sent home so I can be tested and have a place to quarantine away from my FAMILY MEMBER. Everyone has Covid-fatigue but I will push through and stay as safe as I can. This year has taught me that when this pandemic is over, I need to live my life protecting immunocompromised people even if I do not know them. If I get a cold, I will wear a mask. I never want to be the one to blame for someone else falling sick or dying. -
2021-02-12T15:27:16
The Year to End High School
Coronavirus hit the United States during my senior year, and it made things very difficult. No one was really worried about coronavirus at the beginning of 2020, but when March hit people started to realize that coronavirus was more serious. March 12, 2020 was my last day of in-person high school and I had no idea. I did not get to go to the actual last day of in-person high school because I had a respiratory infection at the time. Halfway through the day on March 13, 2020, is when they decided to close all schools in the U.S. for two weeks. All of the kids in my grade thought it was only going to last two weeks and then we would be back in school to finish the year, but that didn’t happen. After the two weeks off, they gave an extra couple of days off to figure out how to change completely to online learning. We ended up finishing the year online and although my classes got easier, my life got so much harder. I am an essential worker that works for a long-term care facility and when I was not doing school or schoolwork, I would be at my job doing as much as I possibly could to keep my residents fed and safe. I had a lot on my plate at the beginning of the pandemic with balancing school and work and trying to figure out how to still have a social life while staying in my house. I also had to be very careful with whatever I did because I needed to protect my parents who are sixty years old and seventy years old and also protect my residents who are mostly sixty or older. Since I was so busy working and doing school nothing hit me until May when the school decided to cancel prom and graduation. This hit me hard because I worked so hard for twelve years to now get nothing. I worked so hard to have all A’s in middle school and high school and be on the honor roll all of those years to not even get to celebrate my achievement. I had one night when I was thinking about all of it and I ended up having an anxiety attack and crying to my sister all night because I was so upset with how I was ending my senior year. I eventually got over it and starting college was such a weird experience it’s been so hard to make friends with people and we haven’t been able to have normal college experiences. Now that it is almost a year after the schools closed there are now two vaccines out and I have been able to receive both rounds of it because of my work, but there are still so many that need to receive the vaccine and we still have a long time before we return to normal. -
Anxiety during the Pandemic
Since I can remember, I have always been a very nervous and anxious person. On my first day of second grade, I couldn’t even bring myself to leave my mom, and usually kids grow out of that stage when they go off to kindergarten. Throughout all of grade school, and my freshman and sophomore year of high school, I was always insecure, self-conscience, and very sad. It finally got better my junior year of high school and the only reason it got better is because I was on medicine. I went to a therapist and took my medicine on the regular, but I still was very anxious. I guess anxiety is just a part of who I am, and it is not something I can grow out of. After giving explaining my background with me being a very anxious person, you can probably see where this story is going. Obviously moving away for college was a very scary and anxiety increasing time. I could not sleep, eat, or smile the two weeks leading up to leaving for college. The sad thing is is that I was finally getting better, but then college came. Believe it or not though, I moved to Pittsburgh for college, and my anxiety got better. I was not as insecure and really learned to not let things get to me that used to get to me. It was March 14, 2020 where my life, and my anxiety started to go back to how it used to be in grade school and the beginning of high school. This pandemic has not been easy for anyone, and everyone can attest to that, but having anxiety and then having a world pandemic hit was horrible. I remember getting the email that told us we had to go home, and I had an anxiety attack. Because of my anxiety, I am a big planner and having to leave campus and not knowing when we will return put me in a state that I hope I never go back to. My mom picked me up on Sunday, March 15th, and that day I did not sleep, eat, or talk for about fourteen hours. I did not like how I did not have a scheduled day to go back to school, which made me so anxious because like I said before, I am a planner. We never got to go back to school and let me tell you online classes made me so anxious. I felt so behind, because going from all in person classes to all online classes is not an easy transition for anyone. Being a person with anxiety, I felt as though I was put into a world, I was not meant to be in. It felt so rushed, confusing, and honestly, I was at my lowest in the middle and end of March. I remember crying to my parents about how I didn’t want to do school because it was miserable and going out in public was so scary to me. This pandemic was publicized everywhere, and I thought in my brain, if I go into the grocery store, I will get COVID, and I know that is not true, but that is how my anxiety works. I did not go anywhere for about four months, and if I did, it would be for a drive in my car. I did not see anyone for about five months because I was worried about where they have been, and if they have the virus. This whole virus really made my anxiety worse and put me at my lowest point in my life. I felt like I did not have any friends, and I also felt very dumb because I thought I knew nothing that was going on in my classes. I started seeing a therapist again and it really helped. The fact of being scared to go into the grocery store or mall or even seeing friends seems silly. I wasn’t scared, it was just my anxiety because I wanted to make sure I did not get the virus. I hope this virus comes to an end, because I know how much it took over my mental health, and I believe I am not the only one. -
2020-08-21
College Through A Pandemic
While I have been incredibly fortunate to remain shielded from the harsher effects the pandemic has wrought on so many families and individuals over the course of the past year, I have faced a multitude of inner challenges in the transition from high school to college. Attending college, in the most normal of times, can prove a formidable adversary for those like myself who struggle with anxiety. Navigating a new campus, facing distance from loved ones, and managing an increase in course load all were deeply concerning facets of the experience in my eyes, even when a global pandemic was an inconceivable complication to these already daunting tasks. Most paramount of my worries, perhaps, was the social aspect of college. Though incoming freshmen are often reminded that this is an area of insecurity common to every new student, the restrictions that students were dealt amplified my ever-growing hesitations. Mandatory isolation, lack of social gatherings, and limited opportunities to meet others culminated into the manifestation of my deepest social anxieties. If I couldn’t cope with the pressures of normal interaction, how could I be expected to thrive in an environment barren of the very opportunity? I spent many nights leading up to the looming day of move-in sitting on the couch with my parents, often talking until the early hours of the morning. I was, at first, hesitant to express my feelings and risk sounding ungrateful or ignorant of the great privilege I possessed. So many people yearned to be in the position that I myself wanted any way out of. I was thankful for the opportunities that I had been given, and I felt that squandering them and conceding to my anxious preconceptions would be an insult to all those who weren’t given the same chance under the difficult circumstances the pandemic established. After many hours of deliberation with my family, I felt that letting my increasing social anxiety dictate my future would be disposing of a precious opportunity for personal growth. When the day of move-in arrived, it was impossible to ignore the pit in my stomach and the tightening in my chest once my parents had said their goodbyes and departed. Though I couldn’t have felt more alone in that moment, I quickly learned that this was far from the case. After only a brief period of awkward silence, my roommate and I set about decorating our space with posters representative of our shared taste in music and love of hockey, interests we soon found to be shared among a small group of people in our building. Through our conversations that first night, it was not only clear that good friends are much closer than my anxiety would have liked to admit, but also that we were going to establish a deep bond in experiencing the often challenging, always unique adventure of attending college in a pandemic. -
2020-03
COVID- College Freshman Edition
My introduction to COVID-19 was something I will probably never forget. March of 2020 I was in my freshman year of college halfway through spring semester. It was being rumored that COVID was taking over the US and people were dying from this virus. I was uncertain, as the rest of the country, as to how many more people were gonna die and truly how contagious this virus was. I had some knowledge on the virus because I actually did an informative speech on COVID back in the Fall of 2019 in my public speaking class. At the time of my speech there were about 10 possible cases within the US. That number today is about 27.3 million in our country alone. Everyday became uncertain with health and travel which both played a major role in my life. I attend my university in Pennsylvania, and I live in Florida, leaving me 900+ miles away from my family. Being 18 at the time, having rumors of our university closing down scared me. I became afraid of how I was supposed to pack up everything on my own, find somewhere to keep it or a way to ship it home, and be on an airplane, and finish my freshman year of college during a global pandemic. There were then rumors of states shutting down and people being unable to travel in and out which made my situation even worse and my stress levels to increase. Spring break was approaching, and many schools developed the same plan- close schools and universities down for a few days and go from there. This turned into schools remaining online for the remainder of the school year (3 months). This is where my story gets fun (heavy on the sarcasm ). Before I flew home for spring break my mother called my school and specifically asked if the university planned on shutting down so that way, I could properly plan out my flight, pack up my room and put everything in storage. The university said that they did not plan on doing so and if plans changed, they would notify us. Well….. I flew home two days later on a Sunday and once I landed, I got an email from the school that we would be remote for the rest of the spring, fall 2020 was uncertain and that all residents needed to move out within week time. I was filled with anxiety and anger. I now had to find a storage place, figure out how I was going to transport everything because I didn’t have my license, and if Florida and Pennsylvania would let me travel. This also meant that I had to pay for another flight to school and back home as well as a hotel. I was able to book my flight, work with Res Life on a timeframe to move my stuff out and a storage place with a way to transform. My main issue once I landed was a place to stay. Everything in the country began to close including hotels. I did not book a hotel in advance because I was told that I could stay on campus, but of course when I arrived, I was told otherwise and had to find a hotel. Once again, my mother made a phone call and was able to get me a two night stay at a hotel. In the end I was able to pack up everything and fly home without getting the virus, it just took a lot of hoops to jump through to get there. -
2021-01-07
As the pandemic puts strain on LGBTQ youth mental health, here's some advice
A news article discussing the mental struggles of the LGBTQ+ youth, and how quarantine is negatively affecting their health, as well as some helpful tips. -
2021-01-31
My Second COVID Christmas
My wife and I just had our second COVID Christmas, this time with my mom's side of the family. Because very few on that side can work remotely, almost everyone has had and survived COVID due to work exposures over the past six months. Until we're able to secure vaccines, I also expect at least some of us will have to endure a second round of illness. Having Christmas in January was a strange experience, much like Baseball in November from 2001. I'm glad we finally got to assemble for a few days, and I appreciated most everyone's responsibility with their conduct. My sister is a nurse and treats the pandemic with too little respect. Although she's potentially outside her immunization period, she still acts as though she's chock full of antibodies capable of defeating every new identified strain. AND, she waited until we'd all been together for a full day to reveal her boyfriend has had COVID symptoms for a few days but refuses to be tested. Beyond the drama and anxiety that inspired, I'm grateful to have seen my grandmother, and I'll be even more grateful to know that she doesn't develop signs or symptoms of illness in the coming days. The lesson I learned from this family function is that I can't trust those closest to me to candidly assess the risks those pose to the rest of us. They can't differentiate between their right to make their own health choices and my right to do the same. My understanding was that we had all been sufficiently careful for several weeks to ensure no one would bring COVID to the Christmas celebration, and I was wrong. My bad. I promise it won't happen again, and I won't attend another family function without being vaccinated first, at least not with my sister or a clear, deliberate, and sworn confirmation that everyone I see has been sufficiently cautious. This entire pandemic at this point for me is a balance between mental and physical health, and it turns out they can't both win. -
2021-01-28
Invisible Enemy
Living during the time of a pandemic has inevitably changed my own surroundings, but what I find most striking is the fact that many of these changes are almost invisible to me, considering I stay home as much as possible. Sure, I hear the fire engines and ambulances working around the clock every day, their sirens blaring, but since I am inside, I never see them. Even more concerning is the fact that people in my area have almost certainly been infected, but again, I have never seen any. Similarly, chances are if you have not caught COVID yet, all the knowledge you have about how to combat it does not com from ones own personal experience, but from instruction from a third party. As a result, I feel like I both have some sort of an idea of whats going on around me and how to deal with it, and also no idea. For me the silence that I hear is just as alarming, if not more so, than the sound of an ambulance tearing down the street. -
2020-10-15
COVID Scare
Going through the pandemic, I always knew how serious the situation was especially considering how large the number of cases were in Arizona. However, despite all of the people that were getting sick, I never had anyone that I knew who contracted the virus through most of the Pandemic. That was until late 2020. Now due to the precautions I knew I had to take, the only two places that I ever really visited apart from staying at my own home were my parents' houses. My mom and step-dad were extremely cautious when it came to the Pandemic and so too were my dad and step-mom however, I knew because my dad was an essential worker he would be exposed a bit more. One October day, my heart sank when I got a call from my Father telling me that he tested positive for the virus. This sparked a number of fears throughout my head like: "Is my father going to be okay, especially considering he has pre-existing conditions that would make it worse?", " When was the last that I was exposed to my father in timing when he tested positive for the virus?", "Who else could have gotten sick from my father... my step-mom or worse my 6-year-old sister?". The first thing I did, despite remembering that luckily it had been about two weeks from seeing my father, was get tested. I ended up testing negative, but I was extremely worried for my father and my step-mother who I later learned also contracted it. This was the first time I ever dealt with knowing that someone I knew that was close to me got the Virus. I truly feared for my family member's lives. I remember constantly calling my father to see how he was doing and hearing the struggle with the virus in his voice. Luckily, both my parents would make it through the sickness okay. My sister also was able to be taken care of by my step-aunt which was also a relief. As time passed and as my family tested negative for COVID-19, I would be able to visit them again. But, now I truly understood the severity of the pandemic and that the virus held no bias in who it targeted. -
2021-01-25
A Semester of Outfits
I haven’t grown in height since junior high school, and, as a result, I have A LOT of clothes. As sort of a fun game for myself and my students, I do not repeat an outfit through the 180 days of the school year. When school shut down in March, I switched to permanently in joggers, since I no longer left the house. When we began synchronous Distance Learning in August, I knew it was really important for my mental health and to try and portray a sense of normalcy for my students to still dress just like I was going to teach in person in a normal year. Since I don’t get to see all my students five days a week due to our block scheduling format for Distance Learning, I decided to post my outfit to my class Instagram each day, as an “ootd,” just for fun. It’s become sort of an interesting keepsake of my pandemic experience. If you look beyond the outfits and into my eyes you can tell the days I was anxious, worried, tired about the rising case counts, the unknowns, the state of our country, and locally, the true fear of whether they would force us to return to teaching in person. But the pictures also capture that in between the ever rising death toll, wildfires, political discord, racial tension, Capitol riots, life had to keep moving forward. And even during a semester of turmoil, you can see a lot of pictures show joy behind my eyes... and not only when the Dodgers won the World Series, allowing me to retire my 1988 World Series shirt! A new semester starts today, we’ll see what the expression in my eyes says about the state of the pandemic and the world in the weeks to come. -
2020-10-16
Maternal mental health and coping during the COVID-19 lockdown in the UK: Data from the COVID-19 New Mum Study
This study demonstrates the interest of medical professionals in the UK towards the mental wellbeing of new mothers being impacted by pandemic-related lockdown. Various descriptors were used in the survey to assess emotion, feelings, states of being, and how the new mothers could cope with these changes as they specifically relate to the COVID-19 experience and mental health. -
2021-01-24
Anxiety, confusion remain over COVID-19 vaccine rollout at mass vaccination site at CCSF
This article discusses the confusion over how vaccines are being rolled out to eligible individuals in San Francisco. A vaccination site is allowing individuals to get vaccinated without an appointment if there are extra doses at the end of the day. However, while texts are being sent out to let people know they are eligible, without an appointment there is no guarantee they will receive a vaccine if they go to the site; this is leading to people arriving, hoping to receive one of the leftover doses, only to be turned away. This is just one example of how confusion and misinformation about the vaccine is leading to anxiety and disappointment, and a desperate sense of hope that the kinks will be worked out soon so that the vaccination process will improve. -
2021-01-22T20:30
Life in a Bubble
Seldom do we experience an apocalypse in such a light and introspective way. -
2021-01-22
My Experience with COVID Symptoms
When COVID-19 had just started I had heard a lot of people had gotten sick, but no one that I had known. Fast forward a couple of months into the pandemic I get the news that my friend had gotten COVID when I had just seen her a couple of days ago. She has five siblings, one of them was a toddler, her older sister who had a one-year-old was staying with them, and she was pregnant for the second time. Thank god everyone ended up all right including the baby who had not even been born yet. Out of the 9 people that were living in their house at the time only two of them got it bad. The second oldest siblings along with her mom had body aches, a fever, a headache, lost their sense of taste, had a couch, stuffed nose, and couldn't get out of bed for a week. The rest of them only had a cough and a stuffed nose. Lucky they weren't infectious yet when we saw them so my family did not contract the virus from them. Another time this happened, my dad had a business meeting with his co-worker. Three days late his co-worker had tested positive for coronavirus. Once again our minds filled with worry. My grandma was staying with us at the time and because of her age, she was high risk so we sent her along with my uncle to a hotel nearby our house. We waited till we reached the five-day mark and my parents went and got tested. Luckily they tested negative and my grandma and uncle came back home and we celebrated the New Year all together with some negative COVID tests. -
2021-01-04
1 Person, 1 Brain Full Of Negativity
The pandemic made my thoughts turn into this negativity and the thought of being alone scattered through my mind. It really felt like my anxiety and the pandemic worked together in a way to make me feel horrible and scared. -
2020-12-18
Overall lIfe
During this pandemic I got really bad anxiety and depression. I ended up getting 2 gerbils and a cat. I needed to snuggle with them and make myself feel better. The world is so scary still. Everything is getting shut down again, even schools. We are not allowed to leave our house, when we do we have to wear a mask. Grocery stores are almost always empty. Also people feel like they need 20 packs of toilet paper, so getting that is hard. This is important to me because the next generations need to know what happened. History repeats itself, so the next time this happens, they need to know that we can get through this. You are stronger than you think you are <3 -
2020-09-29
The Struggles of Living During a Pandemic
This journal entry was written as a part of the American Studies class at California High School in San Ramon, California. During the COVID-19 pandemic, I have faced a series of challenges. The biggest challenge I have faced is my emotions and accepting myself. Being stuck at home has raised my anxiety levels, and question my self-worth. I feel like when I was outside, around my friends, I was much more confident and free- but being isolated really damages you mentally and emotionally. A challenge that my family has faced is that they usually love going outside doing exercise, and they always take us out for runs. However, now that my sisters and I are extremely occupied with school, we can only manage to go together around once or twice a week. A major challenge for society is adapting to remote learning. It has been a very difficult process for myself and other students as well. Staring at a big computer screen for 7 hours is extremely draining, and I find myself falling asleep during the middle of the day, and I even fell asleep during my AP Biology lecture, and I am not the one to fall asleep during school. I also crashed to sleep yesterday immediately after school ended because I was so worn out and exhausted from school. It’s a lot, and I really hope a vaccine for the virus comes our way soon, because I don’t know how I’m going to be able to handle online school for the rest of the school year. -
2020-12-08
Accurate Covid-19 Working Meme
I found this meme to be quite interesting. We use humor to better our mood during tough times, however this meme depicts reality: the anxiety about going to work this year during this strange new pandemic. This collection item can help future historians determine the society’s apprehension and concerns towards employment during COVID-19. A historian might wonder what this meme implies. Well, this meme implies that the public fears getting sick and what that holds, fear of spreading it to love ones, fear of not recovering, and perhaps work conditions are not entirely prepared. This meme can imply many things based on what a historian wants to argue. -
2020-11-25
The Quiet Thanksgiving
Never would I have thought that my Thanksgiving would be like this. My Thanksgiving usually is with my whole family. But this year it wasn’t. My grandparents are scared of covid and did not come over. My other family, like my uncle, were scared to put my grandparents in danger. It was weird not looking forward to seeing my grandparents. My parents and sister decided to just eat at home together. Usually when we go to the market. It is crowded but now, no one was there due to covid. It felt like a ghost town. We enjoyed our meal and it felt like a regular Thanksgiving meal but I still had that lonely feel of my other family. It wasn’t an awful Thanksgiving, it just wasn’t the same. -
2020
Mind Control: Managing Your Mental Health During COVID-19
The University of Toronto has developed a free course entitled Mind Control: Managing Your Mental Health During COVID-19, in order to equip Canadians with tools to manage our mental health, before it manages you. The course is designed to teach students about anxiety as it presents itself throughout our daily life, from the consumption of news, to the way it is discussed with our children. Understanding how our brains react to crises, students would be more prepared to manage their own mental health. -
2020-11-30
Nova Scotia Premier, Stephen McNeil, calls Atlantic bubble a success, despite withdrawal of other provinces
A statement from Nova Scotia premier Stephen McNeil outlining his thoughts on the Atlantic Bubble.