Items

• 
  2020-06-04

  HIST30060: Loneliness

  The past three years have been incredibly lonely. I've included here a picture of my younger brother on his 18th birthday: a picture I find eerily reminiscent of Edward Hopper's Realist paintings from the 40s and 50s. My brother has always been the most popular person in any room, constantly surrounded by friends, a real party animal. But on his 18th, he was alone (with me and my parents) and couldn't celebrate in the way he would have liked. Since then, he has had a makeup party, but it isn't the same. He also finished high school during this period, and god I feel sorry for the classes of 2020 and 2021. It is easy to be sorry for myself, who has only experienced university through the lens of a post-COVID world, but I was fortunate enough to celebrate my 18th with my friends, finish high-school not on zoom, go to schoolies and travel on a gap year before we were prevented by the pandemic. Poor Sam didn't get any of that, and that really makes me sad.
• 
  2022-03-07

  Rose Oral History, 2022/03/08

  At the Arizona Historical Society's 2nd annual Covid Memorial event, I spoke with Rose and recorded her story about losing her brother, John, to Covid. Rose describes the challenges she faced being far away from her brother as he was diagnosed and then ill. She currently has her brother's dog, Emma, and is trying to re-home her according to her brother's wishes. Rose describes how her last communication with her brother was a text for help. After the recording was turned off and we were walking out, she described how she felt when she was parked and walking to the hospital to say goodbye to her brother she saw anti-mask protestors at Central and Thomas Road. She was so sad and angry that these people were arguing against something that might save lives. She said that she couldn't argue with them and just wished them good health and walked away.
• 
  04/18/2021

  Morgan Ward Oral History, 2021/04/18

  C19OH
• 
  2021-10-04

  My experience and how COVID-19 affected me.

  The essay outlines what I had initially known about COVID-19, what I experienced, what close family or friends experienced, and how I saw the world change as a result. The purpose being to share my thoughts to not only get it off my own chest, but to help others feel comfortable in sharing their own.
• 2020-03-16

  My life with COVID

  The COVID pandemic has affected everyone around the world. Going into march of 2020, I had a lot of pressure put on me by my parents to either quit my job, or take time off because they didn't know how serious the virus was and wanted me to take no chances. I also have an autistic brother who cannot speak so I didn't want to risk giving COVID to him. At the time, nobody knew how severe the virus was, but as time passed I witnessed first hand how serious it was. When I got back to work after taking time off, I saw what I thought was a joke. Shelves of foods completely empty, and all toilet paper sold out as well other cleaning products. This went on for about a month before people stopped buying a lot of things in fear. There would be lines outside of my job because too many people were coming and we didn't want to have a lot of people gathered in one place for safety reasons. More time passed and things sort of went back to normal but people now wore masks and practiced social distancing. Now over a year later, things are more calm and people are finally doing the right thing and wearing masks to prevent the spread of the virus and end this pandemic.
• 2020-01-01

  The real pandemic

  during the covid 19 pandemic everybody was panicking and worrying about getting a vaccine. i just moved here from another state and i left my mom and brother back home. they lived in a bad neighborhood so during the pandemic they was not only afraid of the covid pandemic but the violent pandemic that plagued the streets where they lived. during the pandemic i lost both my mom and brother to gun violence.
• 
  2020-03

  March 2020: A Life-changing Month

  The year 2020 was looking to be much like other years that I spent in college. I was going to be going to classes, meeting up with friends, and working out most days. As March approached, my excitement grew. Spring break was coming, and I had a scheduled trip to Cancun, Mexico. There was talk of a virus spreading through China, but it was very unknown to us. Prior to our trip, we joked about contracting the virus. Little did we know, that would be the week living in the world the way we knew it. My trip to Mexico was everything I wanted it to be and more, but I was ready to come home and finish the semester. We came back from Mexico, and I returned to Duquesne. Within one week of my return, everything changed. Universities around the country started to close for, what we thought at the time, two weeks. Duquesne followed suit. School did not return that semester and the entire country began to shut down. There was a lot of fear and unknown. One minute I was having the trip of a lifetime, and the next minute I was at home with my family only leaving to get groceries. We began using masks everywhere we went, using hand sanitizer many times a day, and staying as far away from others as possible. Although life felt like it completely stopping, the pandemic allowed my family and I to experience something that we might never get to experience again: over a month of quality time together. I was now doing school via zoom and my father, brother, and uncle were home from work. During this time, my family spent a lot of time together. My father and I would find interesting ways to work out every day since our gym had been shut down (see artifact image for a picture of my watch after completing a weighted vest walk. We began these weighted vest walks during the pandemic.). We would watch Netflix series as a family, do puzzles, and even play board games together. I will never forget these memories, even though they were accompanied by fear of the Coronavirus.
• 
  2020-04-10

  A prayer for my mom

  My mom had been sick for more than 2 weeks at my house at the end of March-early April. One morning she woke up and could barely catch her breath or breathe. My dad took both her and my brother who has similar symptoms to the emergency room. They transferred my mom to St. Joseph's for low oxygen levels and an elevated heart rate. My brother was sent home as his symptoms and current levels weren't enough to get him admitted due to the over crowding in the hospitals at this time.
• 
  2021-08-28

  Visiting Grandma

  This photograph is from when my mom, dad, brother, brother's fiancé, and I flew to Georgia to visit my declining grandmother. For my entire life, my grandma, my mom's mom, lived in the next town over, only about seven miles away. However, as she aged and as the isolation from the pandemic set in, my family decided that it would be best for her to move to Georgia to live with my aunt, my mom's sister. Although we tried to take care of my grandma from the start of the pandemic through when she left in October of 2020, we lived in perpetual uncertainty and fear of exposing her to the virus. Every time we had her come over for dinner, we were afraid that we were taking a gamble, especially when the pandemic was just starting. My grandma moved to a care facility in Georgia in April. Since my grandma, my family, and I were all vaccinated, we planned a short trip to make sure we got to see her one more time. Although we were masked and only had a limited amount of time, getting to see us again meant a tremendous amount to my grandma.
• 
  2020-11-01

  Homemade Mask Meme

  I took this photo of my brother when I went to visit him while he was living in Concord, Massachusetts, and I was studying remotely at home in West Springfield, Massachusetts. We had just come back from visiting Walden Pond for the first time. My brother was living with his best friend's grandfather at the time, and even though my brother did not leave the house much, he still wore a mask inside the house as a precaution. After he finished eating, my brother went to put his mask on again, except he aimed a little high. Thinking it looked funny, I took a picture and made it into a meme. I felt like having the mask cover his entire face was similar to a face-palm or banging one's head against the wall, somehow symbolic of the grind that pandemic life had become.
• 
  2020-05

  Roses are red

  My grandmother's birthday is in May, so last year, during the beginning of the pandemic, we were unable to visit her and celebrate her birthday or Mother's Day. So, we sent her a nice card, and in it, my brother and boyfriend made up the poem. It reads "roses are red, violets are blue, when coronavirus is over, we'll come see you! xoxo Owen + Andrew"
• 
  2020-10-05

  Silver Linings

  The past year was a very hectic one. Many things changed over 2020 and overall it was a whirlwind of a year. While there are many bad things to point out about it there are some silver linings too. Due to the coronavirus, we had to quarantine for a while. This forced me to spend a lot of time with my family, but I am very thankful for this now. My brothers are 4 and 1, but I am 14. This means that in 4 ½ years when I leave for college they are going to be 5 and 9, so I need to spend as much time with them as possible before I leave and start a new life away from them. 2020 showed me how important family really is and I will no longer take it for granted. Another silver lining of 2020 was learning that I have a love for baking. When quarantine started in March I would be extremely bored because I had to stay home. I was tired of staring at a screen for so long, so I knew I had to find something to do. This is how I stumbled upon baking. I made sugar cookies for my family one time and I knew I had to continue baking. I fell in love with it. Now I use it to help me calm myself. Being in control of everything I’m doing makes me feel grounded, so even when I’m stressed about something going on in my life, baking makes me feel in control so that I can handle the situation correctly. From the outside 2020 might have been bad, but if you look for the silver linings you realize it might’ve been just the year you needed.
• 
  2020-10-05

  Record of the Day

  I didn’t do very much of anything today, but I’ll give a record of it anyway because maybe it was more interesting than I thought. First things first, I woke up at 6:40 am and didn’t move out of bed until 6:50 am when my dad yelled for me to get up. Then I got ready for school, helped get my two little brothers ready for school, and drank a smoothie for breakfast. We left kind of late today, so the older of my two younger brothers was almost late for school. Then, to make sure my youngest brother was on time and so was I, my dad dropped me off at my brother's drop-off spot and I had to walk the rest of the way to school. I had advisory and the assembly first, so nothing too exciting. Next, I had science where we went over our last experiment and the homework, had a mini in-class quiz, and then we got to finish The Martian. Once science was over I had English where we just worked on our papers that are due Thursday. Thankfully, after that was lunch and recess which were a nice reprieve from schoolwork. After lunch, I had math where we learned about linear systems of inequalities. My last class of the day was PE where I am currently doing volleyball. It was pretty fun, except for my arms were sore after because the coach had us using the heavy balls to practice setting. I went home after PE, had some nut mix for a snack, and went on my phone for a while before starting my homework. I took a break from that at around 5 and went on a walk with my family before coming home and eating dinner. I finished up my homework a little after that and spent some time with my family before going to work out and shower. After I showered I went to bed, and that was my day!
• 2021-01-25

  Covid Statistics

  Overall, I believe that my brother's (unconfirmed) case and my history teacher are the only people I personally know who got Covid. The high number of cases has my parents worried and all the social distancing and mask protocols in place. Also, the times people my parents know got Covid line up with the spikes on the graph during holidays and such. At the beginning of Covid I was rather happy to get to be at home all day but now I'm sick of it and the fact that I can't meet with people.
• 2021-01-25

  COVID-19 statistics and in my life

  Worldwide, there are 99.3 million cases of COVID-19 54.8 million recovered, and in about 2 million deaths. In the U.S. there are about 25 million cases of COVID-19 and about 419,000 deaths. In california (locally) there are currently about 3 million cases, and around 37,000 deaths. This has taken a toll in many people's lives, losing family members, distancing from family and friends, and many other things. I have been affected by COVID because my whole family already had it. We had it during Christmas, because of that Christmas was very dull as we couldn’t see anyone and we had no christmas dinner. I was still able to open Christmas presents in the morning which i am extremely grateful for, but it just wasn’t the same as it always was. When I had COVID I went into quarantine for 14 days and retested after the 14 days, it showed that I had the antibodies. I am not entirely sure how I got it but it happened. When I had it I didn't have any major symptoms since I am so young and healthier than most people, the only thing that happened was that I lost my taste for a few days and then it came back to me, my mom had basically no symptoms, my dad just felt a little tired and same with my brother. We were all fine at the end and now we have extra protection from covid now. I have a family that has been affected by COVID but thankfully no one has died yet. One of my family had to go to the hospital but he recovered, but that’s a story for another time. Right now since I have the antibodies I am not too scared of COVID, but for people that don’t have it I still think that it is a good idea to wear a mask and social distance. I hope that stores and restaurants are soon to reopen as I think that rule wasn’t necessary in my opinion. I don’t think life will ever be the same or at least for a while, but I hope that things can go back to normal as soon as possible.
• 2021-01-22

  Journal

  It was about a year ago we where in New Orleans and visiting our distant cousins a day after Mardi Gras my was feeling terrible and he slept almost all day and had many of the covid symptoms we thought he just was tired. so the next day came around and he was fine but my brother was sick with it. He had it for about three days. After that we lifted New Orleans and about last summer we found out that they both had it my dad and my brother so that's it.
• 2021

  Covid testing positive

  I have not been affected by anyone I know testing positive, and i have not been tested positive. My brother has to get tested every month and he has never tested positive. I guess my moms cousin tested positive and was in the hospital, I don’t know if he died or not though my parents just stopped talking about him. I never met him.
• 
  2021-01-20

  Pancakes for Dinner

  My junior year in high school isn't like any other school year because I could describe it as probably the bumpiest roller coaster I've ever been on. This is because I get to watch Gilmore Girls on Netflix during lunch and lay in bed while logging onto zoom for classes. But the downside is I've been simply alone and away from friends or even teachers for that matter, that I'm supposed to see every week day. Facetime calls are never the same as meeting up with someone in real life so that goes for making up time away from actual school, but I've learned to cherish these moments I have. My family is home majority of the time, and I get to hear my dad play his guitar more often or stay up late with my mom watching Sinister 2 or play Call of Duty Cold War with my brothers. Whatever it is, I'm grateful for this break away from the usual, and I have the opportunity to focus on myself for once. Before quarantine, school was draining me out as I had early classes and I really needed a break, so fortunately, I got one. I've finally found time to think about what I truly want to do in life, and what my future plans are for college because I never really got the time for that during school. I've learned a lot about my interests as well and even time for self-care and all the girly pamper routines. Some days I like to treat myself with homemade pancakes, my favorite, and eat them at any time of day just because I can and I can make them whenever I'd like. Staying home has its pros and cons, but as of now, its important to follow strict protocols in order to safely recover and protect others! so don't forget to wear a mask and social distance when you leave the house because we're all in this together!!
• 
  2021-01-15

  Changes To My Annual Holidays

  My annual holidays consist of Eid al-Fitr, Christmas, and New Years. This is what happened in 2020. I think it's important to be able to document experiences from different walks of life. I don't know how many people would celebrate the first two in the same family, but they've been a big part of my life since I was born.
• 2020-12-17

  COVID-19 Affected My Summer

  With COVID-19 spreading around the world this summer, a lot of my plans I was looking forward to doing were all cancelled. My brother was going to visit Ireland for his abroad last summer, but of course COVID exists. My mom and I were going to meet with him in Ireland and stay for about 4 weeks. I was really excited to go also because we were going to travel to London, Manchester, and Wales. Also not to mention the Irish pubs seem really cool and vintage.
• 2020-09-29

  Covid-19 journal entry

  When quarantine first started I was happy we didn't have to go to school and i thought we would only be gone for a couple weeks. Now that it’s been more than 28 weeks I obviously am not happy about it anymore. I can’t hang out with my friends anymore and going to work is kind of scary. I hate that we have to wear a mask because when I smile at people they can’t see that I’m smiling at them and I just creepy. My mom is a hair stylist so she was out of work for quite a while, fortunately now she open back up again. My brother also lost his job because the business he worked for had to shut down. My other brother Chase was a senior when it first happened and he just went off to college a couple weeks ago. Chase actually got COVID-19 and that was pretty scary but he didn’t show any symptoms or get sick at all. This journal entry was written as a part of the American Studies class at California High School in San Ramon, California.
• 
  2020-12-04

  Roxanne Garcia Oral History, 2020/12/04

  Roxanne Garcia, a worker and mother, is the person I am interviewing. We discuss her life, including some background information about her family; including her parents and siblings. In this interview we reflect on suicide, prison, education, enfranchisement, COVID-19, and motherhood. The overall concept behind this interview is to see where a random mother and worker finds herself within the complexity of modern life, specifically as it relates to her children’s education, prisoner’s rights, and the pandemic. Her experiences intersect many issues and hot topics.
• 
  2020-04-11

  Putting the Pieces Together

  When quarantine struck my family, my brother came home from Illinois State University due to safety reasons. Once he came home, my family started to play tons of board games and watched tons of movies just to spend time together. This was a rare moment as we haven't been living together as a family since my brother moved out, so it was a special time for all of us. This was a fun time for all of us because we got to come together as a family for the first time in a long time.
• 
  10/17/2022

  Sachiko Mortia-Mulaney Oral History, 2020/10/17

  This is an Oral History interview with University of Cincinnati student Sachiko Morita-Mullaney. Sachiko discusses her experience as a student at the University of Cincinnati. She brings up her identity as a Japanese-American woman and how that has affected her personally during the pandemic due to anti-Asian racism. She also talks about her small online business, and the different ways her and her family’s employment have been affected by Covid-19. Sachiko, a Political Science major at the University of Cincinnati, is very informed about the government’s response to Covid-19. She shares her opinions about healthcare in the United States and how racism and classism have affected the United States’ response to the coronavirus. Finally, we talked about the future and the quality of the US response to the coronavirus.
• 
  2020-09-26

  Family Fights

  HIST30060 My family is pretty large: I have two brothers, a sister….and a whole menagerie of animals! Gracie dog is the best, but we also have another dog, several cats, a rabbit, and a variety of feathered friends. My siblings live interstate, so we’ve been barred from seeing them since February because of border restrictions. During lockdown, we’ve been keeping in touch by having consistent arguments on our family group chat about how to rank our pets from best to worst. My brother frames it like a ‘best and fairest medal’, as you’d receive in sport. The conversations remind me of when we all used to live together at home, and they’ve provided a nice reprieve from more ominous discussions about the pandemonium enveloping society. I think the notion of ‘reprieve’ is central to the power of animals in this plague year: they distract us from our pandemic woes and force us to take a sabbatical from our anxieties.
• 
  2020-10-13

  Possibly Fake Cards To Get Out of Wearing a Mask

  Both my mother and my brother suffer from asthma. Before mask-wearing became mandatory by law, they attempted to use a card they had found on the Internet. The card looked legitimate, but we've since found out it may have been fake. Both of them printed it out and had it laminated so they could keep it in their wallets and bags. It stated they did not have to wear a mask due to health issues. Over time, my mother kept having experiences where people in public places such as grocery stores would get upset with her and “call her out” for not wearing a mask. She still stayed six feet away from people, but this was apparently not enough to reassure some. They would become angry and verbally abusive even after she showed them the card and explained that she had asthma. Because of these incidents, she looked for alternatives to masks, including a clear plastic screen which she tied around her forehead and it covered her entire face. But this was very inconvenient and difficult to wear. At the height of the quarantine, stores would not accept the card (as I mentioned earlier, it may have even been fake). As the quarantine began winding down (right around the time restaurants started opening), she was able to wear masks for short periods of time, as long as she could take it off soon after. *My parents got it through a third party, hence why I think it may have been fake.
• 
  2020-05-15

  Please focus a little bit.

  My fourteen year old brother struggles so much with staying focused on work. When we went to online learning, he started falling behind immediately. To help him focus on work, I would sit in his room and go through each piece of work with him so he would stay engaged. He got completely caught up and stayed on top of work until the end of the school year. I lost hours and hours of time. Up to six hours a day that I would spend sitting next to him trying to get him to finish a math sheet, not text his friends back, and encourage him to add another sentence. this was on top of my own schoolwork each day. It felt like a waste of my time, to sit there staring at a wall while he worked through each piece of homework. I was grateful to spend time with him that I normally would have been at school for, but I still felt like it was hours of time I was using for nothing. He would ignore me, fight me, lock me out of his room and refuse to work. He would also make me laugh until I could not breathe, show me a new way of approaching a problem or question, and smile at me when he was proud of himself. Now, he calls me two to three times a day. He tells me about school, his friends, things that are bothering him, and tells me about what he is learning about and reading. He does all of his schoolwork in my room at home and frequently calls me from my own desk to update me on something small. My dorm would be a lot more lonely without the consistent ring of his Facetime calls. Quarantine and virtual learning is now something I am extremely grateful for. My brother and I are closer than ever and I contribute that entirely to online learning and the time I was able to spend with him that normally would have been spent in my high school building. None of those hours were wasted sitting next to him while he worked, they are all showing their worth as he calls me to tell me about his day, something he used to be very closed-mouth on but now initiates. I am grateful for that time I was able to spend with him, and am grateful for safer at home, with the acknowledgment that I wish that time had come from a less deadly cause, but since it did happen and I could not control it, I look back gratefully on that time. The attached photo is from photography outings we started taking during online learning. He would use my Nikon and frame photos while telling me about why he thought it would make a cool photo. We would be out there for hours watching geese, turtles, birds, muskrats, and frogs sharing each other’s silent company. They are some of my favorite memories with him, and one of the highlights of my 2020
• 2020-10-01

  The COVID Pandemic and economic greed

  I wanted to share a bit about my life during COVID. My brother is currently incarcerated, and I would travel at least once a month to visit him. Once COVID hit, visitations were canceled, and my family was forced to rely on phone calls or snail mail. My brother would call us about once a week for his own sanity and ours as well. Several things have happened these past few months, which made our situation as a family more complicated. A phone call to my brother used to cost him (or us) 40 cents a minute. When COVID hit the private company used by the prison to facilitate calls, decided to take advantage of our reliance on phone calls and upcharge their prices. Phone calls now cost over a dollar a minute. Thankfully my family does ok and phone calls are not something we are willing to let go of, but I feel for families who have to choose between food, bills or funding their calling account. I know it sounds like an extreme situation, but there are families that have lost all contact with their loved ones who are incarcerated because of COVID, and these companies are taking advantage of the pandemic. Were now paying almost twenty dollars for every ten minute conversation, trust me it adds up real quick. The worst part is that these companies have contracts with the prisons, and we (the families on the outside) have no choice or say as far as what company we are able to go through to talk to those incarcerated. As if COVID and social distancing weren't enough, I'm now missing and worrying about my brother more than usual.
• 2020-07-08

  Graduation During a Pandemic

  Freshman year of college was an absolute blast! Up until Corona came out of nowhere in March and ruined everyone’s year. The Corona Virus has been playing an extremely negative role in my life since March. In addition to the virus, it definitely does not help that politics are being thrown in the mix and half of the country wants to defund our police department. But we won’t talk about that right now. The virus took away a lot of things that I took for granted. For example, Friday beers with the boys, weekends at the bar, quality family time with my momom and poppop, and eating out at a restaurant. But most importantly it almost ruined one of the most important things that happened this summer, my brother’s graduation. One week in July, I found out that my brother was going to be graduating Holy Ghost Prep on a Saturday. And on that particular Saturday, I was scheduled to work, but that wasn’t the issue, the issue was that there were only two people allowed per person to attend the graduation due to the coronavirus restrictions. I was very upset about the new restrictions because I really wanted to see my brother accept his diploma, as he did for me when I was graduating. I decided that I was not going to let the coronavirus control whether or not I would see my brother walk the stage. When that Saturday rolled around I left work at 11 in the morning to make my way over to the ceremony. When I got there I walked over to my family and pulled up an extra chair to sit next to them. When I saw my brother wearing his cap and gown I was overcome with emotion and was so happy to see him. When I heard his name get called I watched as he accepted his hard earned diploma from the president of the school, and take a quick picture at the end of the stage. I will never forget this memory I have with my brother. The coronavirus overall has put limitations on what everyone can do. Whether that be go to a store with only a certain capacity, not finishing a sport you started when you were 5 years old, or seeing loved ones you haven’t connected with in a long time. I think the most important takeaway from this virus is to never again take for granted all of the good things you have in your lifetime, because you never know when the world will turn upside down again.
• 2020-08-20

  Helping my little brother move in

  Starting college can be hard at any time, and it's even harder for kids starting school during the pandemic. Since only so many people are allowed to help people move in, my brother had to pick between my mom and myself to be the last person to see him the night he moved in. He picked me, and my mom told me over the phone that she cried. Not being able to visit him has been hard because I don't even know how he's feeling during all of this. Being seperated from him because of coronoa for the first time this summer is horrible, and I know there are so many others out there separated from their loved ones because of Covid-19, as well. My brother and I hung out in each other's rooms all day over the summer, and now we can only see each other by appointment. I just hope my brother's first day of college was alright.
• 
  2020-04-17

  Second Adolescence

  This photo is of my little brother, who is sixteen this year, as we were spending time together on the balcony of our house. This was out of sheer desperation in terms of getting out of the house, even though it is freezing outside at this time of year in the afternoons. For two months during lockdown my brother and I spent more time together than we probably have in the last three years combined, given that I am ten years older than him and have lived out of home up until last year our relationship was always a bit like ships passing in the night. In addition to that our relationship has always been vaguely parental due to the age difference (and possibly my own gendered conditioning to adopt a caregiver role), yet in this period I have had such a strange feeling of emotionally revisiting my adolescence due to the amount of time I am spending with my brother and cousin who is eighteen, which has been such a strange and disorienting experience. I feel like this has been such a pointed sensation for me as someone who doesn’t drive, and with public transport it is just bearable as I have some access to independent travel. But when I could no longer go anywhere at all without my mother driving me, I felt like my identity as a capable adult essentially crumbled overnight. There are elements to this that are positive, I feel like my brother understands me much better now and my relationship with my cousin borders more on the side of best friends than cousins in a way that would probably not have happened if I hadn’t been forced to put aside the cloak of adulthood which made me essentially relate to my cousin from a caregiver perspective.
• 
  2020-05-20

  Sanford Lake Flooded amidst COVID-19 Pandemic, 10,000 people evacuated.

  I’m having a hard time putting into words what I feel. My mom lives on Sanford lake in the house that belonged to my grandparents. After excessive rain, the three dams that regulate the Tittabawassee River broke one by one. The lake level rose, and flooded homes and roads. The city of Midland also flooded. My mom, brother, and uncle evacuated. Initially, my mom went to the designated shelter- Meridian Highschool. But my brother called her and said it was a bad idea because it was upriver from her home, probably would flood too, and there’s COVID-19, so being packed in a highs school with a bunch of people isn’t the safest place to be. She ended up going to my brother’s in Midland, which was not part of the flood zone. This morning her house is completely flooded.
• 
  2020-05-06

  Creative Life at home

  Being away from everything that makes life busy has given me a lot of free time. More time to try new things and be creative. Everyday after I finish school work, me and my brother will go outside. Whether we play basketball or try something new with chalk we always have fun. Even though this are hard right now, we can use this time and make the most of it. Marissa Parrin- Mepham High School “Lonely Pirate”
• 
  2020-04-26

  Me and my brother playing madden Tyler Cain

  This is a video of me and my brother playing madden and talking smack. Playful, explicit language!
• 
  2020-04-04

  My little brother

  His facial expression is sad and the fact that we are in a desolate area; no one is around.
• 
  2020-04-18

  In Sickness and In Health

  My brother and I have an argument that has been going on since we were children; regardless of our age, however, it has always been a rather vicious, stubborn battle, comprised wholeheartedly of hubris and the unyielding belief that one is right and the other wrong. He’ll say, You have a weak immune system, not me! And in complete disregard of the trap I have already drawn myself into, I will retort without fail, You get sick more than I do! In this situation, we’re both playing the role of the fool, blindly ignoring the vast number of individuals who struggle with legitimate health problems and compromised immune systems, purposefully sticking our heads in the sand as we burrow further and further into the gilded age of misguided youth and immaturity. Perhaps this can be said of me more so than him, given that I am older and also usually the one who instigates these petty squabbles. The question of physical health and strength has always been a sensitive spot, a result of my years spent simmering under a household ruled by gender roles and conventions. But I like fighting, even if I can never win any of these fights, even if the blatant lies I tell my younger brother are merely pitiful attempts to dissuade the truth. In all honesty, Jonathan never gets sick; I do. Like most people in the day and age of COVID-19, I used to take my health for granted (and no, this won’t be a post about having an existential crisis regarding my mortality). But after being hauled in an ambulance twice––got exposed to the perils and fallacies of the American health care system real quick!––both for stupid reasons and resulting in a pair of pale blue socks and two missing front teeth, I have begun to realize more and more how futile my argument is whenever I try to prove to him that I am the child with the stronger body, the stronger immune system, the stronger sense of self. My body has endured a good bit of wear and tear, thanks to several instances but most infamously when I cruised down the roads of Clifftops, a gated neighborhood in Monteagle, TN, going 20 miles per hour on a longboard. Gravity, speed wobbles, and naiveté caused me to faceplant into the ground. I spat out a mouthful of blood when I finally regained consciousness, full-body abrasions wrapped around my arms, legs, and knees, skin seemingly marred beyond repair and my face looking like a swollen, beat-up punching bag. At first, the doctor thought I might’ve broken my face (maybe I wasn’t destined to be a cool skater and carve roads after all). I had two black eyes and pus for days. Taking a shower and unwrapping and wrapping my bandages was a two-hour hassle, one that I dealt with myself, determined to do alone without the help of my parents. Afterward, I would wipe the glass mirror, stand atop the cool tiled floor of my childhood bathroom, and ogle at myself and the mass of wet, rugged flesh sagging along with my wounds. Even when I was in a drug-induced haze of Percocets and could hardly walk, I was afraid of revealing to my mother and father what my body had become after accumulating ink at various tattoo parlors. Aside from the black pigment that permanently stained my skin, I was also scared of them seeing what I’d become after skidding across the pavement. I finally learned what it meant to be selfish when my grandmother saw me after the accident. She turned on the light and moved to look at me, taking a few hesitant steps. Then she came closer, cradled my face in her hands, and stroked the unscarred side of my cheek with her coarse, callous-ridden fingers as tears began to streak down the corners of her eyes. She murmured to me in rough, unbridled Chinese, her voice cracking at the edges and stumbling over words. My father stood in the corner. When she began to quietly cry, he looked away. My reply got mangled in the lower parts of my throat, my voice splitting at various intervals when both of us would falter. With our heads bowed in unison under the dim light of the kitchen, I imagined our two dark silhouettes of hair merging into one. It was then that I also learned what it meant to be loved. I never tell this side of the story because it reveals the ugly, careless parts of myself that constantly depend on others to pick me up when I have been the cause of my undoing. This is the part of me that I love and hate the most, this selfish, childish impetuousness that has allowed me to experience the world, unencumbered, but at the cost of others. Usually, when I explain to people what happened at Clifftops, I am laughing, joking, making myself seem hardcore and dumb all at once. It is pretty funny if you think about it. Over time, though, while I’ve learned that my physical body is fragile and my soul and spirit deceivingly invincible, I myself am still an uncompromising idiot. Despite everything, I am reckless to this day, still very aware of how I have hurt my loved ones being like this and the many ways that I will continue to do so. Just as I sit in a black leather chair and feel the needle prick into my skin, knowing the anger that will make its way towards me if my family finds out how my skin has been violated, I throw myself into hopeless fights with my brother I will never be able to win. Just as I have grown accustomed to hiding my tattoos in extra-large clothing whenever I go home, I cling to the lies that I tell Jonathan, to the fresh, pink flesh that slowly grows along my face and allows me to forget about my grandmother’s tears. The other day, my brother called me sickly, once again setting off another debate. I’d been coughing and developing symptoms of COVID-19, except for a fever; I was sequestered into my room for around a week and a half, and when I came out, I felt victorious. Allergies, I told myself. Just annoying allergies. I went on bike rides and wore makeup. I listened to music and made art. I still coughed, though, which he’d pointed out. And when I woke up at 2 AM with a raging 103-degree fever for the first time in years, I found myself curling up in a ball once more, grieving for something I didn’t quite understand or know.
• 
  March 13, 2020

  Military Changes

  During this time of social distancing and restraint of large gatherings, my brother was graduating from Army Basic Training. I, along with my parents and many other family members, made the trip from Dickson, Tennessee to Fort Benning Georgia. We went to watch his graduation ceremony and spend the few days he was allowed leave with him. However, the night before we were to leave we received word that the ceremony was cancelled and we wouldn’t be allowed to see our soldier as of that time. After hours of waiting to see what might change we finally were notified that the ceremony was still canceled but we were allowed to see our soldier and bring him off base. After traveling down to Fort Benning we got to watch his ceremony on our laptops and were then allowed to go pick up our soldier. We spent the remaining day catching up and doing as much as we could in as little as possible. Finally the end of the night came and we were headed back to our hotel when my brother got a a call that said he had to go back to base. Furious but helpless we had no choice but to bring him back. Once again because of the coronavirus precautions, and President Trump declaring the virus a pandemic that day, we had no clue when we might see him again. The next morning we got our final notification that we could go on base and spend the day with our soldier but he wasn’t allowed to leave and it would be his last chance to see us. We then went on base and spent what little time with him we could. That night we said our goodbyes and started home. My brother is now somewhere in the middle of the woods with the rest of his platoon in isolation. We have had little communication with him but he said that they will be spending five days in the woods, going back to the barracks for a shower, and right back into the woods for five more days. His base is now on lockdown and no civilians are allowed to enter. After this whole mess and scramble to see my brother I’m just happy we got to spend what little time with him we did.