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fear
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2020-12-23
COVID-19 The Good, The Bad, and The Deadly….
COVID-19 The Good, The Bad, and The Deadly…. When the COVID-19 pandemic struck I was in the spring semester of my second year of nursing school. Being naïve and not having experienced a pandemic before, I expected COVID-19 to breeze in and out like the flu every year. What I didn’t expect was a deadly virus that would leave behind it a path of death, despair, and devastation. One of the biggest areas in my life that was impacted by COVID was my education. As classes moved to virtual platforms there was a major learning curve for both students and professors. CDC guidelines and social distancing made it difficult to find areas on campus to study and next to impossible to study in groups. My friends and I worried about our lack of clinical experiences and how that was going to impact our future. Since I had virtually no clinical hours during my specialty rotations, not only was I unsure of my skills, I was also unsure of where I wanted to take my nursing career. Returning to work over winter break was also very challenging. I am a patient care assistant and medication technician at an assisted living facility. All throughout the summer I worked with the threat of COVID looming above my head like a dark cloud. It was the first time in my life that I felt people really depended on me. I understood that my actions impacted the health of others. Fortunately, my residents all remained safe. However, I was not prepared for my return a few months later. The residents were no longer allowed to have visitors and they started testing positive for COVID. At one point we started to run low on personal protective equipment, but we were still trying to take all the precautions that we could to keep us and our residents safe. It was heart breaking to be the one holding a residents hand as they passed away due to coronavirus. My job became a lot more difficult having to communicate with families and watching their final moments with their loved ones. The residents that were lucky enough to not contract the virus were lonely and couldn’t understand why they had to quarantine. They felt abandoned and afraid. It was a very trying time for all my coworkers since we were all working overtime due to our staffing shortages. Working overtime was both physically and mentally draining. Even on my days off I was called in because staff members were getting sick and were unable to come in. It was mentally exhausting because every day I would come in to work and be nervous to walk in to report and see who had passed in the hours I was gone. COVID-19 also brought about some remarkable changes. I have spent a lot more time with my family as we have discovered our new passion-hiking. My co-workers and I have a new appreciation for one another and take the time to have meals together and support one another to make sure we are doing okay mentally. I have been part of innovative changes like my COVID-19 remote patient monitoring job and positive experiences at the COVID vaccine clinic. I have seen the medical and scientific communities collaborate on treatment guidelines and the development of a vaccine. It has also been an incredible period for change and innovation. -
2021-02-09
INTO THE UNKNOWN
My oldest friend—let's call her Dr. Z— is an infectious disease specialist. She has been working on an AIDS vaccine for decades now, so when COVID came along, it was traumatic for her in a different way. COVID has commonalities with AIDS and she was grim about vaccine prospects. Thankfully, a year later we are all getting vaccinated as a Herculean national effort unfolds. A few days ago New York State announced that pregnant women could now join the ranks of the vaccine-worthy, so my pregnant cousin asked me if I would ask my friend if it was safe. Dr. Z has two daughters, also both doctors in busy New York City hospitals. This was the exchange we had. And now, I ask you...what would you do? -
2020-03-13
What I thought about the Virius in the beginning.
At the beginning of quarantine I was scared. I was scared because we were told that we had to do school from home. Also we had to where masks whenever we went out and we couldn't see anybody because my family is high risk. I was very scared because how people were talking about it, it seemed very bad and I was scared for my family to get it. In the end I was very scared that my family was going to get it but I am so grateful that no one in my family go it. -
2020-03-24
Worldwide pandemic street art
USA Today, like many other media outlets, uses their platform to share images of street art that conveys community messages about COVID-19. Photographs range from March 2020 to January 2021 and include graffiti tagging, murals, paste-ups, and stencils. Many styles of art are represented and can be telling of how artists represent emotions of fear, solidarity, hope, thanks, and humor during the pandemic. Several of the contributions are put on boards covering windows of businesses that shut down during the pandemic, others are on hospital buildings, streets, and businesses. -
2021-01-26
For The Sake Of My Time
At first it was nothing, Then something for all. I wrote and I drew, I played ball. The wind blew outside, strong and loud, But I was inside, away from the crowd, today was no day, for something out loud. And when my notebook fell to the floor, I cried. When my mask shifted on my face, “They could die” But at the end of the day, I picked up my pages for the sake of my time. Author's (Explanatory) Note: I stitched this together through scraps in my notebook that I had written over the year. Some of them on simple topics, others on grave events. This is important to me because it's some of my writing that didn't come planned and pre-packed, but an experience and struggle put together through snippets of my life and genuine, if simple, emotions that are coursing through every single one of us, only to be amplified in times like these. -
2020-10-15
COVID Scare
Going through the pandemic, I always knew how serious the situation was especially considering how large the number of cases were in Arizona. However, despite all of the people that were getting sick, I never had anyone that I knew who contracted the virus through most of the Pandemic. That was until late 2020. Now due to the precautions I knew I had to take, the only two places that I ever really visited apart from staying at my own home were my parents' houses. My mom and step-dad were extremely cautious when it came to the Pandemic and so too were my dad and step-mom however, I knew because my dad was an essential worker he would be exposed a bit more. One October day, my heart sank when I got a call from my Father telling me that he tested positive for the virus. This sparked a number of fears throughout my head like: "Is my father going to be okay, especially considering he has pre-existing conditions that would make it worse?", " When was the last that I was exposed to my father in timing when he tested positive for the virus?", "Who else could have gotten sick from my father... my step-mom or worse my 6-year-old sister?". The first thing I did, despite remembering that luckily it had been about two weeks from seeing my father, was get tested. I ended up testing negative, but I was extremely worried for my father and my step-mother who I later learned also contracted it. This was the first time I ever dealt with knowing that someone I knew that was close to me got the Virus. I truly feared for my family member's lives. I remember constantly calling my father to see how he was doing and hearing the struggle with the virus in his voice. Luckily, both my parents would make it through the sickness okay. My sister also was able to be taken care of by my step-aunt which was also a relief. As time passed and as my family tested negative for COVID-19, I would be able to visit them again. But, now I truly understood the severity of the pandemic and that the virus held no bias in who it targeted. -
2020-06
A College Student Surviving the Pandemic
I chose my Target employee card from when I worked there over the past summer in my hometown, Venice, FL. I chose this object because it represents to me the pandemic when everyone was at their worst, during all the main lockdowns. I keep it in my wallet because I still somehow have an employee discount. But every time I pull it out, I am reminded of that scary summer of when no one knew what was going on or what was going to happen. -
2020-12-10
Baby born to Sacramento mother in ICU, on ventilator with COVID-19
A pregnant mother, and nurse, living in Sacramento, California contracts COVID-19 in her seventh month of pregnancy and delivers her third child. This news article captures some of the emotional struggles she went through from being diagnosed while pregnant and delivering her child. Through this woman’s story, we gain some insight into a mother’s experience of both being sick with COVID-19 and delivering a child during the pandemic. -
2020-03-20
Year of the Switch
Almost as if Nintendo had made a contingency plan for the pandemic, Animal Crossing: New Horizons came out on the Switch around the same time "quarantine" had started. For a lot of people (including myself) it was their only way of having some semblance of normalcy, of a normal life. I personally began to understand the true value of being able to go fishing with my dad without fear of getting sick, and the value of being able to talk to other people and hang out on a sunny patch of grass without the stifling masks and social distancing. For a while, the game gave us what we needed, and it's honestly been impressive to see how far people have come with it. I know that it was an invaluable tool for me to hang out with loved ones, including my fiancee, in every way except physical. Maybe the same goes for others. This specific game system has been the respite of many people, not necessarily with Animal Crossing, but with other titles as well. I don't think i've ever seen that many games come out for a system within less than a year, and i've been gaming since I was six. I'm asthmatic, so i'm pretty limited in what I can do, so having this teeny little game system has been almost a saving grace for my mental health. Almost. Lol. There's probably something ironic about the fact that you start the game on a desolate island and you make the most of it while still being totally isolated from other islands, and being an figurative island yourself, far away from the reach of others. But you make the most of it. -
2021-01-21
MW: Should I Get Tested
The CVS next to my house offers COVID tests. The test is the nose swab one and I really don't want that. I have gotten a nose swab before and remember it being very unpleasant. However, I have been exposed to a situation where I may potentially have been exposed. I don't have any symptoms but the thought of the nose swab is stressful. I wish they had less invasive tests near me. -
2021-01-22
Covid Symptoms
Covid presents with tons of symptoms and although I haven't seen any of them first hand I have heard a story of my friend who had Covid when it first started and even though she is now negative, she still can't taste certain foods. It is different for everyone and some people are even A-symptomatic meaning they are carriers. My family members have had some Covid scares including my grandparents which was very scary considering its very dangerous for them to get it. One person happened to stop by their house who had Covid and didn't know it and nearly gave it to them. -
2021-01-22
Cases of Cvid
We as a family have only known one person that has had covid and luckily we were never near them when they had it. It was a cousin that lucky couldn't make it to our home for Thanksgiving dinner. After they were in the hospital we got updates about their health almost every day and visited them (with masks) after they tested negative and feel much better. I personally would never want to get it because I heard it could cause damage permanently and you could be in the hospital for weeks. So I guess we were very lucky to not have someone with covid at our dinner table for Thanksgiving this year. -
2021-01-22
My Experience with COVID Symptoms
When COVID-19 had just started I had heard a lot of people had gotten sick, but no one that I had known. Fast forward a couple of months into the pandemic I get the news that my friend had gotten COVID when I had just seen her a couple of days ago. She has five siblings, one of them was a toddler, her older sister who had a one-year-old was staying with them, and she was pregnant for the second time. Thank god everyone ended up all right including the baby who had not even been born yet. Out of the 9 people that were living in their house at the time only two of them got it bad. The second oldest siblings along with her mom had body aches, a fever, a headache, lost their sense of taste, had a couch, stuffed nose, and couldn't get out of bed for a week. The rest of them only had a cough and a stuffed nose. Lucky they weren't infectious yet when we saw them so my family did not contract the virus from them. Another time this happened, my dad had a business meeting with his co-worker. Three days late his co-worker had tested positive for coronavirus. Once again our minds filled with worry. My grandma was staying with us at the time and because of her age, she was high risk so we sent her along with my uncle to a hotel nearby our house. We waited till we reached the five-day mark and my parents went and got tested. Luckily they tested negative and my grandma and uncle came back home and we celebrated the New Year all together with some negative COVID tests. -
2020-12-25
Personal COVID Story in 2020
It was during Christmas time, and my aunt wasn't feeling too good. She went to get tested and she tested positive. I had seen her on Christmas day, and she felt sick a few days later. It didn't really affect me, but I got scared thinking that I might have it because I was near her during Christmas. I ended up not getting COVID, thank the Lord. -
2021-01-20
My Story About My Great Uncle Having COVID-19
Back in the summer of 2020, my great uncle got COVID-19 and he had to quarantine himself from the outside world for 2 whole weeks. The reason I heard about this was because my mom had told me and it made me feel kind of scared because I was afraid he was going to die. After 2 weeks, he got better and he no longer had COVID-19 which made me feel less nervous. He is my only relative that has had COVID-19 before. -
2020-10-21
Spend time doing what matters to you most.
During the COVID-19 pandemic I have had to surmount multiple extremely challenging situations that were only made even more difficult by the pandemic, including the death of my last grandparent. As someone with pre-existing conditions, I usually have to be very careful about not just protecting myself when I leave my house in Chandler, Arizona, but making sure I don't spread any disease to my family. When I got the news that my Grandmother probably didn't have much time left due to her cancer, it was extremely distressing for several reasons. The main reason was the fact that I was losing my grandmother, but one factor that was just as, if not more distressing, was the question of how to be able to best safely spend time with her. After a long discussion with my family, I made it clear that just being on video chat or on the phone with my grandmother was not enough; I wanted to find a way to travel to her house in Kansas, and physically be there for her. It was not an easy decision to make, especially when one takes into account that my method of transportation was to fly, which made me very nervous as someone with pre-existing conditions. Fortunately, I was able to take a safe flight to Kansas, but I was shocked to find family visiting my grandmother from out of state that not only refused to wear masks around her, even though she had virtually no immune system left. Despite such stressful conditions, I was able to spend a week with my grandmother just before she passed away, even though COVID-19 made it very hard. The fact that I was able to do such a thing is striking to me, especially when compared to the vast amount of people around the world who aren't able to spend time with loved ones infected with COVID-19 before they pass away. Looking back, I am very lucky I did not get sick, and I was even more lucky that flights were beginning to become regularly available again after they had been shut down earlier in the year. Most of all, I feel very grateful that I was able to spend time with my grandmother, especially when so many people are dying alone all over the world, leaving families distraught, and without closure. -
2021-01-20
Rules I have to follow
Here at oaks christian, they have made restrictions to the normal life I use to have at school. One rule that I have gotten used to is wearing a mask for the whole school day. We have to walk in on direction in the halls, which sometimes makes me late to my next class, or I get lectured by one of the traffic controllers. What makes me sad is thinking that for the rest of my life even when covid goes away, I will still see other people around me wearing a mask and being afraid. -
2021-01-20
The Rules of Covid
This time of fear called the Coronavirus came with many rules and restrictions, many being annoying and unpleasant. During this epidemic we have had to wear masks to prevent us from spreading the disease through the air. Another restriction that have to follow is staying six feet apart from other people as to prevent getting the disease through close contact. At the time of writing this I would say that the whole world is sick and tired of having to seclude ourselves from other people. It has gotten to the point where many people are lonely and depressed. -
2021-01-12
COVID-19 Initial Thoughts
In March of 2020 I got my first real glimpse of what practically the entire next year of life was going to be like. China released a virus that would eventually spread across countries. From that first report everything went south. People began to freak out like it was the Black Plague. This fear spread nationwide in the United States influencing unknowing people that this was a virus to be feared. A virus with over 99% survival rate caused a panic that hasn't been seen in centuries. People almost might as well have freaked out about the common cold at the rate it was/is at. All over the media were false news, lies, and deception influencing such thoughts, giving people different beliefs and thoughts on practically everything regarding it. This year was indeed crazy, but not because of a virus and sicknesses. Because of freaked out crazy people thinking this is the end of the world and influencing others that it is as well. -
2021-01-11
My Early Ideas on the Origin of COVID
This virus, known in early March simply as "the coronavirus", was shrouded in mystery. We were told that it originated in China, which inspired many jokes. A parody of the song "Break my Stride" was the most memorable. In the earliest days of the pandemic, not much was known about COVID besides it's symptoms and things that we were being told could prevent it. That and that it was impossible to find paper products, cleaning products, and eggs. We knew that the symptoms were similar to the flu and that we were supposed to stay six feet away from other people and not high five. We were also told to sanitize everything frequently (hence the shortage of cleaning products) and wear masks. Not much of that has changed since then. We still do all the same things to prevent it, but somehow, it feels that my knowledge has filled out. There is less fear now (the teacher's unions are certainly using that fear to their advantage). Though I know that there is much that I did not understand in March and April, I feel that my opinions and knowledge of COVID have not changed much. -
2020-01-11
Origin of COVID-19
I came back from Christmas break and I heard rumors of a virus in China. At first I did not believe it, but after I asked my dad, and he said that it was an actual thing. I was not afraid of it and I still am not, but there are many people who are terrified of it. After about a month, people started saying it was in California. This was confirmed when we went to online school. I did not enjoy it. It was the first year that I needed to work on my computer to do assignments, and having to do everything on my computer was a challenge, but I was able to figure it out and learned a lot more about computer usage. -
2021-01-11
The Beginning
It was around January 2020 , when I heard of what COVID-19 was. When I first found out that it was in China, in the markets, I have to admit that I was a little relieved that it wasn't near us in Ventura County California. I also remember wanting to learn more about it. I had two main question. How and when? I wanted to know how did this virus come to be. And when did it happen, how long has it been happening. I didn't find complete answers for either. I just found rumors about how it came to be because no one knew. The two most popular reasons were, that it was created in a lab to reduce the population in China/ and experiment went wrong. The other was that the bats in the water markets were dirty and gave the food a virus that the people then ate, which injected them with the virus. I didn't really know which to believe so I started looking into the other question. What I saw for that one was November 2019 but know really knew because China doesn't release information to the public. Over all, none of my question we answered, which made me fear what was going to happen in the future. -
2020-12-25
Christmas in a pandemic.
This year many families were forced into changing traditions due to California lockdowns. My family did not agree with these lockdown orders and instead went on to host a normal Christmas like any other year. We had more decorations than ever, and we gave out presents to everyone. We went to church on Christmas eve, where it started raining while we were outside, and we visited our cousins and grandparents for a Christmas day dinner. Though we were putting ourselves at risk, everyone there agreed to be there and no one got the virus. My prayer goes out to those who had to scrap traditions for Covid, or just through overall fear. -
2020-04-15
Covid-Induced Election Anxiety
The election is today, and this is probably the most important one of my lifetime. I don’t like either candidate, but I really hope Biden wins. I want to keep my rights, I quite like marriage and healthcare. If Trump wins I will most likely lose these things. I only see Trump as a bigot who isn’t doing anything good for this country right now. If he wins this election, I will most likely move out of the country when I am 18. I don’t care if I end up in China, I just want out of here. This election is causing me to fear for my own future, and that of my partner and all of my friends. We are not completely safe in this country, and we likely never will be. 2020 has been a garbage year for me and this election is quite literally the cherry on top of all things awful. I shall update this later with my thoughts and feelings after the election. If there is truly a God, he will let Biden win. I also have my driver’s test next Monday and that’s making me feel even worse right now! -
2020-12-13
Covid-19 Mental Health Interview from the Perspective of a Pharmacist
The contributor of this item did not include verbal or written consent. We attempted to contact contributor (or interviewee if possible) to get consent, but got no response or had incomplete contact information. We can not allow this interview to be listened to without consent but felt the metadata is important. The recording and transcript are retained by the archive and not public. Should you wish to listen to audio file reach out to the archive and we will attempt to get consent. -
2020-11-25
The Quiet Thanksgiving
Never would I have thought that my Thanksgiving would be like this. My Thanksgiving usually is with my whole family. But this year it wasn’t. My grandparents are scared of covid and did not come over. My other family, like my uncle, were scared to put my grandparents in danger. It was weird not looking forward to seeing my grandparents. My parents and sister decided to just eat at home together. Usually when we go to the market. It is crowded but now, no one was there due to covid. It felt like a ghost town. We enjoyed our meal and it felt like a regular Thanksgiving meal but I still had that lonely feel of my other family. It wasn’t an awful Thanksgiving, it just wasn’t the same. -
2020-12-11
my life while there is COVID-19
the object of this is to show people how i managed to stay safe during the pandemic -
2020-02-28
Covid on the Media
I was scrolling through Tiktok just like a normal day. Everyone was talking about this virus from China, so I felt the need to do some research. This is where I found out what it was, and how to protect myself. -
2020-02-28
Covid on the Media
It was a typical day for me. I had finished my homework and went to check my phone. I went scrolling through Tiktok but noticed something was off. There was a new virus in China all over Tiktok, so I felt the need to look it up. I did some research and realized how quickly it was spreading and to how to stay safe. -
2020-02
When COVID19 came
When I heard that the disease COVID19 had entered California I never thought that it would be as bad as this. Wherever we go we have to wear a mask, and we can rarely see other people because we are frightened that we might catch this horrible disease. The first time I heard of it was when my friends called me and they said that their school was being shut down. This disease was spreading like wildfire. My school had not shut down yet but my parents started getting very worried. They started having me bring disinfectant wipes to wipe down my desk each time I entered a new classroom. Then came the day that we had to go on lockdown. I told myself that it was going to get better and I would be able to see my friends again, but soon after zoom started, the school year was over, and here I am nearing Christmas in 2020. At home still in quarantine. I hope it gets better soon. -
2020-12-10
The Story That I Knew Was Coming
To the February 2020 me, it was a normal day in my life. I woke up at 7 o'clock to get ready for school that started at 8 o'clock. My mom was reading something on her phone when I got downstairs to eat breakfast. She told me of this new virus that was going around in China. My heart started to drop. I had my family over there and most of them are my grandparents whose health isn't exactly in the best condition. I was worried about them, not think for a second how it could spread to the US. I got into the car with my sister who sends me to school. She got her podcast ready, the BBC World News Podcast. It was normal for her to play it in the morning when she gets ready for work. I listened along, not really focusing on what they were saying. But this podcast was a bit different than before. It talked about how there was a new outbreak of an unknown virus in Wuhan, China. I started to feel worried again. Whenever my mom told me something, I would think about it and then later forget about it. But this story was now on the BBC World News podcast which means that something is going to happen. I knew that my family lived away from Wuhan so I thought that it would be safe. I listened to the end of that story, thinking about it until I reached school. I walked up the stairs and never really thought about it again until a few weeks later. My family in China said that they had to stay inside their house and could not leave unless they needed groceries. To me, this meant that it was getting serious. But this was not the worst news I heard that week. The worst is that there is someone in the US that has the virus. I knew then that things are starting to be extremely different than before and I was not far from being right. -
12/03/2020
Hannah Wolfenson Oral History, 12/03/2020
In this interview, I meet with Hannah again after several months, to ask questions surrounding her experiences with Covid-19, as well as how a course on the history of pandemics has shifted her mindset. -
2020-12-07
The Home Within My Head: My Experience of COVID-19 In Prose
I have always been acutely aware of how poetry connects people across places and time. Today, more so than ever before, humans are grasping for a connection as intimate as physicality without having to be in the same room. This poem speaks to that struggle. I hope it helps others out there, suffering from isolation, to feel a bond across the deep chasms COVID-19 has cultivated in our new world. -
2020-11-21
Traveling During Corona
There is always extreme anxiety while traveling during this pandemic. The most recent time I went on an airplane, there was a lady who refused to put on a mask and I was leaving from a country where case numbers were rising quickly. It was terrifying as we were all in an enclosed space. The flight attendant had to ask her many times to please keep on a mask but she refused. They ended up having to call security at the arrival destination. -
2020-11-11
Texas Becomes First State to Reach 1 Million COVID-19 Cases
Following the rise in COIVD-19 cases the world is seeing recently, Texas has become the first state to reach 1 million total cases with El Paso as one of its main hotspots. California became the second state to reach 1 million cases just recently. -
2020-03-18
"Take My Hand" - A Song Written On March 18th About COVID
HIST30060 This is a very rough demo of a song I wrote and recorded on the 18th of March 2020, right near the beginning of the Coronavirus pandemic. Moreso than anything else, this song expresses my emotions about COVID come March 2020, namely the fear, insecurity, and dread. The first verse draws on the imagery of the empty University campus, and of the two-week quarantine period. The second verse includes a reference to an image I remember seeing from Wuhan, where a dying COVID patient was wheeled out of the hospital to view a final sunrise, as well as the videos from Italy of people in quarantine singing together from their balconies. The chorus is about the paradox of wanting physical contact but being afraid of breaching social distancing. The bridge references St Jude, the patron saint of lost causes and hospitals, drawing on those feelings of hopelessness about the rapidly degrading pandemic situation. -
2020-10-06
Fear, Fiction, and Facebook
(HIST30060) Content warning: suicide mention. As the pandemic has developed over the course of the year and Victoria has progressed through lockdowns, a Facebook friend of mine from high school has taken to discussing COVID-19 extensively. She posts very regularly (on average between 20 and 30 times per day) with commentary on the pandemic, ranging from sanctimonious to outraged, sharing posts from conspiracy groups, pandemic-denying politicians, and other Facebook users that downplay the existence or severity of the virus. The series of unsubstantiated claims and recurrent mentions of ‘breaking news’ from various unnamed rogue health workers results in some of her Facebook friends querying her content and questioning the validity of her sources. When they reply to her posts, her Facebook friends often attempt to share news articles and updates from verified, fact-checked sources, but when this happens she talks past them, avoids the question, engages in a range of logical fallacies, or outright denies the validity of the information with which she’s been presented. In particular, she received significant backlash from her friends when she shared a post about the Australian suicide rate in 2020, crediting an alleged (untrue) increase directly to the lockdowns: one friend responded to say ‘I’m swiftly losing respect for you and the misinformation you keep posting.’ Earlier in the year, her posts gained greater traction among her Facebook friends: people would react to them, comment with information, speculation, or gentle disagreement; by now (November), the engagement her posts receive has dwindled down to the occasional like, but usually nothing more than that. Seeing her posts when I checked Facebook began to remind me of a conversation I’d had with my housemate about the role of fear and a desire for control behind belief in conspiracy theories; namely that these belief systems might bring warped comfort on some level. In situations that are scary, believing in some nameless, faceless ‘them’, or connecting with other people who claim to have secret insider information hidden from the general public, might help ease a feeling of powerlessness by believing someone is in control. I would allege her Facebook posts stem at least in part from fear, which I feel is more than understandable given an underlying experience for many people this year has been a deep, semi-constant sense of paralytic uncertainty. While I empathise with this, and genuinely feel compassion towards her for what she’s going through, I can’t help but think the way she has responded to these feelings is irresponsible at best, and dangerous at worst. I find her advocacy of the importance of independent research and critical thinking approaches irony, as the ‘research’ she describes appears to consist of discussing factually incorrect information with other scared people who are also searching for stability and predictability. I don’t begrudge her the fear she feels in any capacity, nor do I want to pass judgement on how others cope with this experience, but I can’t help feeling that this does more harm than good; I worry it proliferates false information, and further demoralises those who read it. While individual conjecture, ideas, philosophising, and critical thinking are absolutely necessary and a healthy degree of scepticism is vital when reading anything, I believe there is a degree of responsibility one assumes to check, even cursorily, that the content they’re sharing has some basis in fact, especially in instances like this where people are quite literally dying. While the experience of the pandemic is undoubtedly having a severe effect on her, I feel irritated reading her advocacy of things that will objectively place other people at risk of illness. It seems to me insensitive to spread deliberately divisive misinformation, given there are people who are assume risk every day when they go to work (even in a country that has implemented measures to control the spread of the disease, when many countries overseas have not). I worry about the broader social repercussions of the division and polarisation that misinformation contributes to, both in the case of COVID-19 and in other contexts. When I look over the things she’s been posting on Facebook, I feel overwhelming pity and compassion for what she is going through individually, and what everyone in Victoria is undergoing as a collective. I understand that everyone is coping with an extremely stressful and emotionally taxing experience and is attempting to manage as well as they can. I’ve seen parallels drawn between the COVID-19 pandemic and previous pandemic disease outbreaks and major historical events in general, and the comfort people derive from a sense of shared experience during difficulty. I think in part the pandemic has cemented in my mind the confronting fact that being alive is just living through a series of major historical events; that history is not something that has happened to other people, in other places, at other times, but is happening now and will continue to happen, over and over. While this is incredibly confronting to think about and dredges up an overwhelming feeling of powerlessness at times, it seems to me by looking at both the past and the present that people working to mutually support each other make upheaval, fear, and uncertainty much easier to bear. -
2020-11-06
Summer School and COVID19
One thing that scares me about becoming a teacher is the fact that I may not be able to go into a classroom to teach when all this schooling is said and done. After reading the archives that I have it seems that teachers are being affected by this just as much as the students are. The schools that are allowing students to enter are in limited fashion with a lot of rules that apply. for example, the archive I am referencing shows a picture of a classroom with only chairs in it and no desks. due to covid they are not allowed to use desks for sanitary reasons. It makes it seem as though the schools should not be open anyways if they arent able to take notes. It really makes it seem as this is a trial run for this school to see if they are going to be able to allow students into the school when the regular school term starts. The time that we are in is making it hard to do the things we loved to do before the pandemic and I think we can all agree we will be happy when things get back to normal. -
2020-11-06
The Faculty Perspective
Both of my parents are teachers, one working as a fourth grade teaching assistant and the other an eighth grade math teacher/soccer coach. Though I have left home, and started my first semester of college, I have heard their rants, their grievances, and complaints regarding the ways in which the school system is "taking care" of their faculty. My mother and father are both paranoid about the coronavirus, rightfully so, however they were told they must return to the classroom to teach students in person. While there are rules and restrictions in order to carry out this plan safely, there is only so much they can do. Take my mother's fourth graders for example, they don't understand the concept of a pandemic or the need to socially distance. She must enforce rules upon these kids that they don't see as necessary and, more often than not, choose not to follow. This makes my mother, and teachers in general, feel as though their safety is not a priority and as if they are not being thought of by the school's administration. The same can be said for my father. Though his eighth graders may have a better grasp of the new restrictions, his soccer season was a mess. Socially distanced, masked, and with only three games total, it simply did not make any sense. What appears to be happening is the school is choosing to cater to students' parents' wishes, to obviously provide their children with as close to a normal schooling experience as possible; however, by doing so, they are ignoring the comfortability and safety of their teachers by placing them back in the classroom. -
2020-04-29
"Reasons I Can't Do My Homework"
This digital comic demonstrates the anxiety and fears that arose during the pandemic around April of 2020. The artists shows how they are being overwhelmed by the fears for their own life and the lives of their loved ones because you can clearly see “mom” and “grandma” in the fears scrolling through their brain. Because of these fears there is no room for “school work” and “classes”. -
2020-10-29
First Day of Cold.
It's cold. I usually waited for the cold. I enjoy wearing a sweater, and the escape from the heat of summer. This year, for the first time, I dreaded winter. They said COVID-19 is stronger in the cold. I guess we will find out. -
10/09/2020
Anonymous Oral History, 2020/10/09
This interview was conducted as a part of a COVID-19 archive project. In it she discusses her day to day life, how her life has changed since COVID hit the US, and how her home is coping with those changes. She discusses the effects that COVID has had on her family and community and how it has affected her son who has OCD. Lastly, she discusses her hopes for the future. -
10/10/2020
Angelica S Ramos Oral History, 2020/10/10
Angelica Ramos is a full time mother and student living in Gilbert, Arizona. She is studying history at Arizona State University. She is an Arizona transplant, having moved from her hometown of Los Angeles, California when she was 23 years old. She keeps busy caring for her two small children; balancing school and activities for her children, her own schoolwork and managing her household, all in the time of COVID-19. In this interview, she discusses her thoughts, challenges and feelings on the pandemic year, and what she hopes is on the horizon for next year. -
2020-03-21
Policing the Plague
This is a photograph of myself that I took just prior to the service of a search warrant on March 21st 2020 in Salinas, California. The state of California was the first to issue a statewide lock down order due to COVID-19 and had done so just the day before on March 20th. Officers in my department were required to don our gas masks for the service of search warrants and other specific activities at this time due to concerns of contacting the virus. These specific gas masks are issued to be used in environments in which CS or CN gas is introduced. They are also designed to be effective in nuclear fallout and are subsequently extreme overkill in regards to protection against COVID-19 and additionally utterly unpractical for officers whom work 40 plus hours a week. The requirement to wear these masks was very short lived as we soon downgraded to surgical masks and cloth masks. Nonetheless, this exemplifies the fear that has surrounded COVID-19, especially in the early days of the pandemic, and the often drastic reactions we as a society have had in response. -
2020-10-14
Driving to Apartment
The audio recording are the sounds of my car and the cars around me as I drive home after another day at work on Dover AFB. I could explain and explore all the things that COVID impacted on the base as well as in regards to deployments, missions, and military/civilian personnel, but that will have to be a separate COVID story for another time. As for my car ride, the audio highlights one of the most confusing things about human behavior for me during the pandemic. Where was everyone going? Majority of businesses were closed. Visitation to family and friends were greatly discouraged. The beaches were closed. All the states around us were closing their borders. Yet, people were driving all about the roads like the COVID wasn’t going to stop them from being somewhere. Don’t get me wrong, the base was still open and I was still going to work. Also, a good portion of the people living in or around Dover were military or military families. Still, traffic around me didn’t ever seem to really slow down or make sense connection to the pandemic. In fact, the closer you got to the base, the worse the traffic became because the base had closed all their gates but one. This meant that everyone who needed to be on base to work or go to medical (not much was open at the start of COVID and things are slowly working their ways back to somewhat “normal” hours) had to go through a singular gate. I would sit in my car for almost an hour, listening to my music and the music of the cars around me as I waited impatiently for my wheels to a spin a few more inches forward. In some ways, this audio clip reveals something special about the history of the pandemic. The audio and my story attached to it showcases not only the human nature to adapt, but also humanity’s resiliency to sustain a way of life. At the same time, pandemic unveils our values and driving force. For instance, were those driving around the pandemic going to work for monetary value? Were they driving to see loved ones through a window? Maybe they were driving just to have a purpose? Or they just trying to escape the confines of the sanctuary of their home? Was it about politics? This also brings about the question of fear. Fear of being alone. Fear of confinement. Fear of death. Fear of boredom. Fear of lost freedom. -
2020-10-15
Covid-19 in One Word: Present
I was on Spring Break during my senior year of high school when my school closed because of covid. They said it would be closed for one week, then two, then a month, then until next fall. No one knew what was going to happen. How will classes work? How will finals work? Will we have graduation? Can we go to college? What's gonna happen? The virus itself is scary and intimidating, but arguably more so is the uncertainty it brought to everyone's life around the world. No one could answer all of our questions. No one knew what would happen, and still, no one knows what the future holds. This uncertainty caused fear in almost everyone. Not knowing what will happen or how things will turn out, is a very uneasy feeling. This also caused fear. Now, this was a dangerous thing; fear weakens the immune system. As soon as I understood this, I realized I could not live this way. I needed to change my perspective or I would fall into the dark hole of fear of the unknown. So I decided to accept what was, let go of what was not, and be what is. I decided to focus purely on the present. This did not come quickly or easily. Honestly, I am still having to choose daily to focus on what I can control in my life at this moment. Every day is different. Some days I smile into the sun without a care of what the world will throw at me. Other days, I sit in bed wondering what could possibly go right. But despite it all, I remain in the present, the only place to truly be. This is why instead of thinking of everything covid has caused me to miss or how long it will last, I am focusing on the opportunities I have now, the new connections I can make, and the ways I can live in spite of this pandemic. That is why my one word for Covid-19 is present. Although covid may be horrible, it offers us the gift to learn how to live in the presence of uncertainty. -
2020-10-13
The Pandemic Lifestyle
When this whole pandemic started I was startled. I had to start living my life in paranoia. Everything I did had to be careful, safe, and with caution. Covid 19 has become one of the United states biggest worries. How do you know if your friend is sick?; but she is known to have severe allergies. How do you know if your father has covid?; but, he gets really bad back pains on a regular basis. All the common symptoms of covid are also regular issues in someone's daily life. Not knowing who's sick, who isn't, who carries it, who's immune to it, is very scary. Having to be quarantined for months just made me feel like I was being held captive. Not by choice but by demand. The fear of being sick and not knowing. Knowing that this deadly virus could have infected your neighbor who sleeps on the bed on the other side of your wall. This pandemic has brought me nothing but fear. Fear of dying, fear of being infected, fear of losing a loved one in the process. It all just comes down to faith. During this pandemic that's what I tried to have most of. Following precautions to avoid it, staying distant from my family, not going to the fun places i enjoy.School will never be the same. Having to do online learning is difficult. The focus is harder and understanding what's going on in class is frustrating. Not only that but civilians had to learn how to adapt to the new life. A mask became a part of everyone's daily necessities. Walking into stores without a mask is prohibited and even walking your dog now has an extra twist to it. Having to walk 6 feet away from each other has become a primary concern. While I was sacrificing my boredom other people were sacrificing their lives. Doctors, nurses, cops are all the important people who make sure our lives are safe. They put their lives in danger to protect our own by choice. While people complain about not having fun, workers are fighting for their lives everyday, and they may not even know it. They are at risk every step they take, out of their home, or office, or facility, wherever they are based. They are taking a risk to save civilians who can barely listen to protocols that are given. While people are complaining about not being able to go outside,they aren't wearing their mask. How do you expect for things to change if no one can make it better on their own? That right there, is a question you should be asking yourself. -
2020-10-08
How Covid-19 took over the world
It has been such a crazy time witnessing how this pandemic has evolved these past couple of months. I clearly remember how queasy I felt once I heard that there was a positive case confirmed at my university. The environment around campus just seemed a bit odd; everyone felt confused, anxious, and even a bit fearful. At that moment, people really didn’t use masks and were downplaying the virus as if it wasn’t anything to worry about. This made me feel a bit hesitant to wear a face mask since I didn’t want people to think I seemed too exaggerating. As the days passed, the number of positive cases drastically increased not only on campus, but around the world as well. At that point I knew it wasn’t a simple virus and that I shouldn’t care about others’ opinions in regard to face masks. I started to be very precautious and wear my face mask everywhere I went. Eventually, the transition to virtual classes was instituted and I got to stay home for the rest of the school year. Although I felt safe staying inside, the news and social media was very successful at causing anxiety in my household. It was very overwhelming to hear the progression of this virus and how many people were losing their lives because of the pandemic. This made going out to buy groceries such a fearful experience, especially since not everyone used their masks which could have exposed so many people to this deadly virus. I remember asking myself, will wearing a mask become the new norm in this society, will we have to get used to carrying face masks everywhere we go just like our purse or identification card? I remember learning about the bubonic plague, or the Spanish flu in my history classes, but I never imagined I would experience a pandemic myself. -
2020-10-05
Fear More Deadly Than The Virus
The story I chose to upload was my own short story written in the perspective of third person. I wanted to submit something that would be set apart from the other submissions. We focus so much on the pandemic and how if we don't use a mask or follow rules we could die. We have allowed fear to control our thoughts and emotions, allowing fear over facts to control our actions. I am more afraid of those acting out of fear as opposed to the virus itself. I hope the simplicity of my story brings a different perspective to the table of this topic. -
2020-07-17
‘They’re scared’: A look inside the COVID-19 crisis in Arizona prisons
As COVID-19 began to spread across the Southwest in March, lawyers representing incarcerated Arizonans reported “unsanitary conditions,” “inadequate medical staffing and treatment” and a “failure to take strong and sensible precautionary measures” in state prisons. The combination left prisoners “highly vulnerable to outbreaks,” the attorneys wrote in a letter to the state before asking a federal judge to intervene. The judge did by issuing an order for officials to release more information, but prison advocates say it hasn’t been enough. Nearly four months later, complaints of insufficient safety measures and subpar medical care continue to plague Arizona prisons. At least 569 prisoners at 13 of the state’s 16 prison complexes had tested positive for COVID-19 as of July 15, according to the Department of Corrections, Rehabilitation and Reentry, and at least 371 staffers have reported positive results. Justice reform advocates and others with ties to the correctional system worry the state is running out of time to prevent an even more dangerous surge in cases. COVID-19 can spread swiftly in crowded indoor spaces and among individuals with chronic health problems.