Items

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  2020-08-24

  How I've Been Occupying My Time to Not Occupy Spaces

  Like most people, I have discovered an interest in hobbies that I never really had the time to indulge in prior to the pandemic. I was living in San Francisco, beginning the end of my college years and looking forward to what the future held for me and my beautiful, and not at all expensive, B.A. in philosophy that I was to receive in December 2020. Most of my friends were graduating in the Spring and I was so envious... that was until the pandemic hit. Everything moved so quickly. I had only 3 days to move out of my apartment, say good-bye the the people closest to me, and leave the city I've had the privilege of living in for the last three years. A city where I've scattered memories all over the place, danced through the streets with kindred spirits I hadn't met before, and developed a fierce love for my first home as an independent young woman. All stripped away from the palms of my hands, and in a matter of days it was the end of an era. It was the beginning of a global pandemic, something barely anybody had experienced before. The world seemed to only inhibit negativity and death, a cocktail very few people could take, and that's including a chaser. Sadness filled the air and polluted social media platforms. We all felt uncertain, scared, and alone. These feelings crept up, and leeched onto us. But one thing was absolutely certain, I had all the time in the world. There I was, 22 with no job and nowhere to go. There was nowhere I could go. So I did what any ordinary person would do in this situation, and I taught myself how to function the way humans did before social media and the internet. I learned to do some of the things that were once taught to young women in school with the intention of making them a qualified wife, but I called them hobbies. I learned to knit, embroider, sew by hand and by sewing machine, thoroughly clean a bathroom, and I also mastered the art of Mediterranean cooking. In the photo I have a attached I am showing off a scarf that I made in the first couple of weeks in quarantine. I playfully boasted my finished craft to my philosophy of nature class, and we all had a laugh. I miss that group of people. I do, however, find some happiness in being able to take a step back and slow down. The only reason I was able to do so was because I didn't have a choice in the matter. The world was crashing down right before my eyes and I couldn't do anything to stop it aside from staying home and staying away from others. What I think this narrative has to say about the pandemic is that people actually have the capacity to entertain themselves outside of the internet. Growing up I was always using the internet. I went from selecting my Top 8 on MySpace to watching prank videos on youtube to having class virtually. I have become sick of screen time that I have no choice but to pick something up to stay interested in the ordinary day to day. I've developed skills that could help me out in the future, if I could be so brave to assume there is a future of course. It is important for me to find some light, to find some joy. I giggled before this global pandemic, I've giggled during, and I will giggle after. Heck, I giggled while writing this personal narrative called an assignment. I have to giggle, it keeps me young and alive. It is important to find some light in all the darkness, and I think that's one of the most important things I've truly learned through all of this: To be the light you so desperately want to see. I've called that scarf my quarantine sqarf, and I can't wait to wear it for the rest of my time and then gift it to someone I love one day when I am old and saggy, if I am so lucky to get there. Stay safe and wash your hands.
• 
  2020-04-02

  Living Through a Pandemic

  It never occurred to me that a virus starting in Wuhan, China could create a significant impact in other countries far away. Nevertheless, here I am sitting in isolation, or as our government calls it "social distancing." Myself, and all the other college students have had to convert to online learning. Which has not been that bad, but there are some times where I have missed a class or two to gain more snooze time. Online school has made me realize how much I miss being in the physical classroom. The aspect of repetition every week kept my mental health stable. I as well as many others have also had to deal with heading back home to our parents. Just as I caught a glimpse of independence, I'm back under my mother's rule of "my house my rules." My mom works for DCFS (child protective services) and is considered an essential worker. She as well as many other essential workers are commonly face to face with the virus on the daily. Specifically, my mom has to evaluate houses in Aurora and Elgin, Illinois, where the virus is hitting Kane County the hardest. It's scary to know that someone in my family can be easily exposed to the virus. But I understand that she has to do her job and keep children safe, especially during a pandemic where she has told me, "people become crazier when they're stuck in their houses." In the first month of being back home, many arguments were had with my 22-year-old brother and mom, so I decided to move to my dad's house and have been here ever since. Many other families have experienced the same problems with communication and alone time as it is hard when you're stuck with one another for 24/7.