Items

• 
  2021-04-07

  COVID-19 and the Brain

  COVID-19 has gone through a number of classifications. First as a “flu,” then as a “respiratory disease,” then as a “vascular disease,” and is in more recent studies, as a “brain disease.” Some reports are finding that one out of three COVID-19 survivors have mental health and/or neurological issues. This not only informs us of the complexity of COVID-19, but also brings light to the need to continue medical and psychological support of COVID survivors. Some survivors are described as having PTSD, and anxiety disorders are being diagnosed in a number of survivors. Neurologically, many survivors report “brain fog” and other issues. Another unexpected toll the virus takes on those infected.
• 
  2020-11

  Comparing the Impact of COVID-19-Related Social Distancing on Mood and Psychiatric Indicators in Sexual and Gender Minority (SGM) and Non-SGM Individuals

  "There has been direct correlation with mental health disparities and sexual and gender minority (SGM) compared with cisgender heterosexual individuals. SGM members report having elevatedrates of emotional distress, symptoms related to mood and anxiety disorders, self-harm, and suicidal ideation and behavior. Social support is inversely related to psychiatric symptoms, regardless of SGM status. The COVID-19 pandemic—with its associated limited social interactions—represents an unprecedented period of acute distress with potential reductions in accessibility of social support, which might be of particular concern for SGM individuals' mental well-being. In the present study, we explored the extent to which potential changes in mental health outcomes (depressive symptoms, worry, perceived stress, positive and negative affect) throughout the duration of the pandemic were related to differences in perceptions of social support and engagement in virtual social activity, as a function of SGM status. "-Front Psychiatry. 2020; 11: 590318. Published online 2020 Dec 22. doi: 10.3389/fpsyt.2020.590318
• 
  2020-09

  College Students During COVID

  This is a story about how college student's mental health has been affected during COVID as a unique population. I wanted to include this to provide context about why my interviewee may have been reluctant to seek out resources due to the extra stress that he had been experiencing. This study goes into how the factors that college students, in particular, are experiencing. This article was done by a survey and shows how common these feelings are that may have deterred students from seeking help due to stress.
• 
  2020-06-20

  For LGBTQ Patients, the Coronavirus Brings New Challenges

  This article by John Hopkins Medicine is talking about how the COVID-19 pandemic has impacted the LGBTQ+ community. The doctor points out that community members are more likely to be smokers and so they are higher proportionately to have complications with COVID-19. The doctor also points out that gender-affirming surgery in the Transgender community has been delayed or is not being done at all which has impacted that community greatly. It is important that the doctor gives the advice to not isolate ourselves in the LGBTQ+ community throughout the pandemic.
• 
  2021-03-28

  Unintended Consequences of Lockdown

  I am researching the unintended consequences of the COVID-19 pandemic. This article is an in-dept look on the consequences of lockdown in the US. While the article covers positive consequences like less pollution and less contagious diseases like the flu, I am going to talk about some of the ones related to my research. The article says most “unintended consequences fall generally into five categories: lack of care, isolation, wealth/health loss, psychological harm, and harm to children.” Lack of care includes people who do not feel comfortable going to the doctor or hospital for fear of catching COVID-19. The amount of people who went in for a severe heart attack has dropped by 40%. Isolation consequences include things like an increased rate of suicidal thoughts and an increase in drug overdoses. Wealth and health loss is due to loss of income, and as evidence shows, poverty is deadly. Psychological harm involves burnouts and stress related breakdowns, as well as mental health disorders and insomnia. The harm to children section includes many heartbreaking statistics about lack of school based mental health care, sexual abuse, drug use, and neglect. The article talks about how the effects of all of this may not be known for many years, but it is clear there have been many negative consequences of lockdowns due to the pandemic.
• 2021-03-28

  Vaccinated

  I know the LGBTQ+ Community has a higher chance to have depression, anxiety, and other health ailments like many other minority communities. This Friday I got my second dose of the vaccine. I have been encouraging others in my LGBTQ+ Community to get the vaccine so this is one less health ailment they have to worry about.
• 
  2021-03-21

  How does the pandemic affect children?

  This link provided showcases the severity of the pandemic's effect on children's mental health and it becoming the next "wave" in the pandemic
• 
  2021-03-10

  Justice for Angelo Quinto

  Tonight AAPIWL joined Angelo Quinto's family + community, the incredible organizers of @justiceforangeloquinto, Civil Rights Attorney @johnburrislawfirm , the mother of Oscar Grant- Rev. Wanda Johnson, @justice4steventaylor grandmother, @robbonta, Cat Brooks @antipoliceterrorproject, Antioch's elected officials, and hundreds of community members from all over the Bay Area to celebrate Angelo's 31st birthday. Tonight we all learned that Angelo was well loved by his family in Antioch and in the Philippines. His family talked about how amazing and special he was, and they were proud that he wanted to pursue his passions in art. We learned more about the powerful community that will continue to support the Quinto family in their fight for Angelo. Thank you again to the organizers for this beautiful celebration and vigil, for uplifting Angelo and his family, the call for solidarity, the need for mental health resources, demanding the end of police violence and the need for accountability for Angelo and the countless men who were also murdered by the Antioch Police Department while having a mental health crisis. We will continue to fight with you all. #JusticeForAngeloQuinto #JusticeForAngeloJusticeForAll #AAPIWomenLead #InSolidarity #StopAAPIHate
• 
  2021-03-17

  Cordale Handy in Mental Health Crisis Killed by Saint Paul Police

  In 2017, 29-year-old, Cordale Handy was killed by Saint Paul Police as he was navigating a mental health crisis. Since her son’s death, Cordale’s mother, Kim Handy-Jones, has continuously championed an end to police violence and demand accountability for her son's death.
• 2021

  The year that was, pandemic and my mental journey

  I live in Cleveland, Ohio. I grew up an hour away in Ashtabula, Oh. My fiancé and I went to a concert they day before everything else closed down. We had no clue it would be the lass mass gathering we would go to in over a year. We moved during the summer and that kept us going. However, after being in lock down and not being able to see our friends and family began to make things harder. We all know the tole that covid has played on physical health but mental health is something the news hardly covers. We have young nephews that we couldn't see. My dad turned 60 this summer and we couldn't have a big party. Summer passed and fall came we thought maybe we can get together for Thanksgiving. Then well if we skip Thanksgiving we can have a family Christmas. That would not be the case. My sister and brother in law had a big family Thanksgiving with his family and they all ended up getting covid. They were around my dad and he got sick. Christmas was a no go. I was worried about my grandma who was 84. It is now March 2021 and we are "remembering" the last year. People without anxiety are feeling the mental affects of a year were we were not able to have parties, gatherings, weddings, and even funerals to remember the lives lived and lost. It is hard not seeing the friends and families that we took for granted before covid. We all need to take a moment, and take a deep breath. Check in with our mental wellbeing. It has been a long year.
• 
  2020-05-16

  Covid-19 The Challenges of a Mental Health Provider #AZHISTORY

  Covid-19 changed the way we deliver Mental Health Services. This is my personal story of how it felt and what it required to provide Trauma Psychothery during the Pandemic.
• 
  2021-02-28

  #JOTPYLesson from Amanda Lehew

  I have learned to be more positive about my mental health. Before the pandemic, I was having uncontrollable panic attacks, and when everything went down it made me realize, I was not alone. @Ronway_Twitty @JakeSilbersack @JeremyZitnik @EGonzaba @ReelVisualProd
• 2021-03-02

  Quarantine Silver-Lining Moments.

  It is quite obvious that the Class of 2020 all share a collective disappointment with graduating via zoom but I personally had no problem with it. I honestly believed that it was a blessing in disguise, I didn’t have to sit in the hot sun and wait for my name to be called, wait there awkwardly as the teachers give an mediocre speech about me, and lie to all my classmates face when I claim that’ll I miss them and promise to keep in touch. In the beginning of Virtual Learning, I was the happiest I’ve ever been, which was due to the majority of my teachers teachers that were having a difficult time adjusting to online learning and were only able to assign one work sheet per week. During the first week of the pandemic, I was able to actually find my true self, my dislikes and likes, my ambitions, and my fashion sense. Although it got tiring staying home for the majority of my time, I still preferred to stay home and keep my safe from this deadly virus compared to actually having a social life, I learned that I appreciate my company and being alone more than I thought. As some may find quarantine completely damaging to their mental health and are unable to spend their days inside, it did the opposite for me, It improved my mental health drastically and gave me time to begin my journey of self-love and because of this I honestly would not mind if New York implemented yet another lockdown. I believe it would be beneficial to everyone because it would not only flatten the curve but it could potentially allow us to have less restrictions during the summer.
• 
  2021-02-25

  Time to Reflect

  Although we live in a time where mental health is getting so much recognition it is still nice to be reminded that it is ok to take a minute and reflect. It's been a year since Covid hit, almost a year since our first quarantine here in Arizona and it seems like so many people are trying their best to get back to "normal" life. We are trying too hard to work, study, parent, and live as we did over a year ago. The sad truth though is that people are still dying, they are dying in high numbers and we see those numbers daily. I'm one who has felt bad for not being "productive" especially when Covid directly affected my family, but posts like these remind me that it is not only normal but healthy to feel. Posts like these remind me of the importance of the grieving process. I have lost a lot this past year, but I will not lose my humanity.
• 
  2020-02-19

  #JOTPYPhoto from Coli

  My depressing room is basically me during COVID 19 #JOTPYPhoto #jotpyphoto
• 
  2021-02-14

  My Story: I Got COVID-19 Because of ICE

  I am sending a diary style writing where I share my experience during the pandemic. I focus on the issue of ICE during the pandemic. Before the lockdowns, my uncle was detained by ICE and was deported during the pandemic. My uncle has been living in the US for 25+ years and Mexico, my uncle's home country, has changed a lot since he last lived there. For that reason, I went to Mexico to take him home. This made me get COVID.
• 2020-01-01

  Surviving 2020 & COVID-19 Pandemic: Life As A College Student

  As the ball dropped on New Year’s Day I embraced and kissed my boyfriend in excitement of what would await us in 2020, if only I knew. As we said our goodbyes to our friends we drove home on a side road to avoid the frantic traffic of drunk drivers and people rushing to get home. All I remember is driving in front of my boyfriend’s car and then waking up to him sobbing over me. My car lights were on, sunroof open, glass shattered everywhere, my blood stained on my wheel and purple bruises on ribs. Long story short I was smashed into by a drunk driver, my car flipped, rolled, and was finally crushed into a tree with me inside while my significant other watched it unravel before his eyes. This was my beginning to 2020 and I wished and hoped that it would only be better from there on but I was horribly wrong. On March 11th of 2020 I received an email from my university stating that it would be closed and urged all students to return home for the remainder of the semester. As many college students saw this as an extended spring break at the time we were all happy since it basically meant more partying. After week one passed of receiving the email I quickly realized that being isolated would be my downfall and it sure was. By the end of the Spring semester I had failed a couple classes and was desperately trying to crawl out of a depressive episode. Since I am, or rather struggling to be a nursing student still, failing my Anatomy and Physiology I class sent me into a spiral of what ifs and how my GPA would recover from these failed courses. The realization of retaking these courses in order to save my future and using my only two chances of “erasing” my unsatisfactory grades crushed me. I was shattered by this reality but continued to push myself through Summer term to ace these courses, I studied day and night sacrificing friendships and days out for an A. As Summer came to an end Fall came and I barely passed the classes online because I struggled to adapt and truly retain the material meanwhile peers in my class were either completely giving up or cheating their way through the online, remote exams. To add the cherry on top, I was battling my university’s Housing Board in order to cancel my dorm agreement because many COVID cases had been recorded in my building and my roommates still went out to clubs while not wearing masks. As the months passed and semesters came and went, I felt my sanity slipping and today I still sit in fear of my future. I struggle leaving my apartment due to the fear of exposure to COVID and accidentally passing it onto my only parent who suffers from lupus. This pandemic has truly crushed me and unfortunately it seems that I will be spending the remainder of my college life and 20s in this chaotic, barren, and lonely society where we only see each other screen to screen.
• 2020-02-24

  My Coronavirus Experience

  In the beginning of the pandemic, I immediately realized how a large portion of the public was not focused on the virus itself, but the racial controversy of the virus' origin. This was unnerving to the core, because it is a fact that COVID-19 came from China. While it was unacceptable to accept this as fact, MERS literally stands for Middle Eastern Respiratory Syndrome. It is clear that there was a pro-CCP agenda being pushed in the background when propagating the "COVID Safety" spiel. As time went on, more and more inconsistencies began popping up. Beauty and barber shops closed, but Nancy Pelosi is more than welcome to get her hair done. Masks become required to enter any building or participate in society at all, but when the new President was sworn in, the spectators were sitting shoulder-to-shoulder and masks were few and far between. What my story says about the pandemic is that while we may have had a real potential global crisis, I believe things were skewed, twisted, and flipped so that it is most convenient for those who hold the power, and not done in the best interest of the American people. An example of this in real life was how the Los Angeles Lakers, Ritz Carlton, and Bank of America (per store) were able to get PPP loans, drain the pool of PPP money, and leave small business owners fighting for crumbs. I have linked a Washington Post article below that expands on the PPP loan problem and how our government failed small business. The pandemic I fear will have long-lasting, Orwellian effects on our society in the sense that those in power will continue to use fear mongering to control the public through COVID. Even though a vast majority of the population has already had it and are building antibodies, Western European-style, 1940s era vaccination cards are beginning to circulate. I fear these cards will be the new "gold star" or "Scarlet Letter'', except those without it would be barred from society, rather than those with it. In my opinion, COVID today is what AIDS was in the eighties. Lots of unanswered questions, lots of fear, and government intervention so that free thinking is minimized. These three, and you have a perfect recipe for controlling the masses. Both diseases were politicized to death, and public opinion of the disease swung back and forth with politicization. If AIDS was blown up to the proportion that COVID was, I couldn't imagine the backlash the political and science communities would get from a certain demographic of people who are very vocal and have a statistically higher likelihood of contracting HIV. I hypothesize that pandemic would turn into pandemonium. With that, my experience during quarantine was as expected. Mental health suffered due to lack of human interaction and ability to go outside, and physical health suffered due to inability to go outside and lack of motivation which was connected to mental health. The main positive thing from the pandemic I can identify is the performance of my stock portfolio. Even though I lost my job due to COVID, I was still able to afford rent, food, and supplies to stay hunkered down in my new $900/month prison for my three month sentence. Another big positive from the quarantine was my savings. The pandemic helped me realize how much unnecessary or emotional spending I do. It helped me point out lots of bad habits I have so I can work on fixing them. Things like spending money when I'm sad, and identifying vices that hold me back in my day-to-day. While the pandemic brought a lot of negatives to me and the world around me, I believe there are some positive things to take away from it. Opening your mind to more than what the government feeds you, appreciating every moment you have, embracing new hobbies, and learning how to maneuver through change. These are all things the pandemic has taught me, but if I had the option, I wouldn't do it again. In terms of being a part of history, simply by living you are a part of history. I was at Sloan-Kettering in NYC with my family getting a life-extending cancer treatment for my father when 9/11 happened. He was one of three patients that day because while in surgery, the first plane hit the towers. The rest of the patients to be seen that day were canceled. I suppose the point I am trying to make is that history is subjective. 9/11 wasn’t 9/11 to me. 9/11 was the day I was blessed with enough time to make some foundational memories of my father before he passed. It can be argued that since I have been invested in GameStop since November, I was a part of history there too. I went to the Game 7 Cardinals vs. Red Sox World Series Game in Fenway Park. The game that broke the Bambino Curse. Again, it could be argued that I was a part of history there too, except my three year old self was asleep for the last two innings. History is subjective, and every day, everyday people like you and I make history. Historians and memoirists will use these events in the future to write articles, make movies and tv shows, write books, and extrapolate many other kinds of art from it. However, most often historical stories are told through a lens of subjectivity, and because of that, eventually all history becomes skewed to the point where it is indistinguishable from fable.
• 2020-03-20

  Journal of the Plague Year

  The Corona Virus aka COVID-19 has drastically affected my life as well as the entire world. COVID-19 first affected my life during my second semester sophomore year of college. The beginning of sophomore year was when we first started hearing about COVID-19. At that time, it wasn’t really a big deal. It was more like a myth in a sense; it was happening everywhere else but here. And then, March came. More and more reports of COVID-19 in the United States were being presented. It was starting to become a serious threat. The day after Saint Patrick’s Day, I was with some friends and we were all hanging out and getting lunch. During our lunch, we received an email saying that we had to move off campus within the next week due to the threat and seriousness of COVID-19. We were all so shocked and upset that our sophomore year was cut short. In the blink of an eye, we had to pack up our entire college lives and leave to go home. All of the memories we were supposed to make were gone. For me, all of my friends were at school so going home was very hard for me. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family but, I also want to be able to see my friends. Once I got home, I had to do the rest of school online and had to be quarantined in my house. Online school was such a new and difficult experience. I had never done online school and neither had the professors, so it was a very difficult transition. Something else that was difficult was being trapped in a house from March until May. I am not the type of person to just stay cooped up in a house. I like to be out doing things and socializing with others but, I couldn’t do that. I was confined to my house with only my family. It was hard finding things to keep us all entertained every day while also trying not to kill each other. We tried puzzles, games, family walks and hikes, movie night, and everything in between. These things worked but only for a short period of time. Being quarantined really does affect your mental health. I also had to celebrate my twentieth birthday in quarantine which was not fun at all, but at least I was with my family which made it better. Then came July. July first was when I was moving into my first house in Pittsburgh for college. I thought that it was going to be such a fun and exciting time. But it was difficult with the whole pandemic going on. It was hard to see my friends, go out to eat, and go to the bars. I was still able to have fun, but it was still difficult to adjust to a new lifestyle. Online school full time was also hard, but I got through it and figured out how to do school efficiently. Come end of October, I got COVID-19. I didn’t realize of shitty COVID-19 was and that I could even get it because I was so young. I had all of the symptoms except loss of taste and smell. I was bed ridden for two weeks; it was awful. After that things were as good as they can be during this time. A week before New Year’s Eve, my entire family tested positive for COVID-19 except me since I had already gotten it. They got really sick and I had to take care of them and grocery shop and run errands for them. That was hard for me to watch them all be so sick. But they got better and became healthy. Yes, I haven’t had this extreme story due to COVID-19 but it did affect my life in ways that I didn’t think it could. I had to change my entire way of living because of this virus.
• 
  2021-02-07

  Canada's LGBTQ+ Community Struggles with Housing & Health (On Top of the Discrimination)

  Unfortunately, the LGBTQ+ community is no stranger to discrimination. From school, to work, to finding a safe place to stay. We have heard about campuses closing due to the pandemic, and thus left many in the community to reevaluate their housing options. Some have had to return to their family home, despite some of those homes being less than accepting of them. With everyone concerned over their health, it is only right to allow everyone to feel safe where they live, too. However, this does not only affect the youth populations. The older members of the community have also been struggling with housing and healthcare. As one of the linked articles wrote, there is a lack of data collection regarding the LGBTQ+ populations. Their needs and concerns cannot be tackled with if the data were never there to begin with. It seems to go downhill from here as health concerns increase while their mental health deteriorates.
• 
  2021-01-07

  As the pandemic puts strain on LGBTQ youth mental health, here's some advice

  A news article discussing the mental struggles of the LGBTQ+ youth, and how quarantine is negatively affecting their health, as well as some helpful tips.
• 
  2021-02-07

  Supporting Children with ADHD During A Pandemic

  ADHD is thankfully not as new of a topic to talk about, but I cannot deny that the stigma against mental health still exists today. While thinking about how so many children are now spending a year and an uncertain future indoors, learning from home, and some unable to grasp why, I thought about those with ADHD. A person’s home is supposed to be associated with comfort and otherwise relaxation from a day at out in the world – at school and work for guardians. Associations can be very powerful, and it can be rather disruptive for children with this big of a change. Half a child’s day is typically dedicated to academics and social connections and is especially important for children in their formative years. Due to the pandemic, they have been pulled from that environment they have already associated with learning, friends, and routine. The links provide some assistance for guardians who may be struggling with their child(ren), especially those diagnosed with ADHD. Concentration and routine seem to be the biggest obstacles, so I do hope the strategies provided may be of help to guardians and their dependents. https://childmind.org/article/giving-kids-with-adhd-support-and-structure-during-the-coronavirus-crisis/ https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/COVID-19/Pages/ADHD-and-Learning-During-COVID-19.aspx https://chadd.org/adhd-and-covid-19/
• 
  2020-10

  Keep Trucking Along

  In the beginning of the year 2020 no one knew just how historical this year was going to be. As a high school senior, senoritis was really kicking in and graduation was in sight. One day, in my global studies class, on the news, we heard of this crazy virus going around in China. I remember thinking, “Oh, it’s fine. It won’t affect me in anyway.” Little did I know there was a whole storm of challenges, obstacles, and battles coming my way. At first, I thought I was just getting a nice two-week break from school and we would be back, and everything would be fine. That two weeks has tuned into over 150 days of lockdown and a completely changed way of life. Every single person all over the world was affected someway by this virus, which is crazy to think about. Nearly everyone struggled with mental health and life changes throughout this time. I did as well, and although my mental health was at its utmost low during the Covid-19 pandemic, and is still recovering as the virus is still taking its toll with a new strand and heightened cases, I want to bring attention to an even bigger struggle I dealt with during this unpredictable, utterly horrible time period: the loss of my best friend. On October 26, 2020 my grandmother passed away at the glorious age of 90. My grandmother had health issues for the past five or so years of her life, but her state started to rapidly decline in August of 2020. At this same time, I was preparing to leave for my first semester as a student-athlete at Duquesne University. Leaving my family, my friends, my hometown, and my significant other was already so difficult but adding on the fact that leaving and knowing that it would take away my last moments with my grandmother was a pain I never thought was possible. I chose to still go and start off the semester since my grandma was moving around hospitals and I could still call her and see her on weekends if I wanted to go home and do so, and it was what she wanted me to do. I talked to her right before leaving for school. With the pandemic, she was only allowed two visitors everyday between the times of 2 and 5pm. So, with the majority of our family living around the hospitals, we had to all schedule times each day so everyone could get a chance to talk to her because of the one visitor limit in the hospital rooms. And I will never forget talking to my grandmother through my face mask about college and hearing how excited and proud she was for me to be where I am in my life today. Only a few days after that conversation, my family and grandmother made the decision for her to go into a hospice facility. This hospice facility was far more strict than the hospitals. My grandmother was allowed no visitors in her room. The only way we could talk to her was over the phone. We are extremely lucky that she was given a room with a window. My family would go and stand at her window so we could see her and more importantly so that she could see us while we talked on the phone with her. I came home for a weekend or two to talk with her through her window and got to see her in her chair with her favorite blanket smiling at all the accomplishments and stories I wanted to share with her. Once her health was at its lowest and her long, well deserved time here was nearing an end, me and my two siblings got to go into her room and say our goodbyes. The next morning my mother got a phone call that my grandmother had passed away. Losing someone, especially someone so close like my grandmother was to me, is the hardest thing in life. But with a global pandemic on top of it … the difficulty and feelings of it all cannot be explained. In the end, I know my grandmother would want us to keep living our lives and “keep trucking along” as she used to say. So that is what we did. Knowing now that she is at peace, out of pain and that she does not have to deal with this crazy world situation in her unstable health condition anymore, gives me and my family closure and security during this time of uncertainty and fear. And I will always know she is right beside me, pandemic or not, watching over me and cheering me on each and every day.
• 2021-02-01

  Covid-19 Statistics

  Over the pandemic, I've learned a lot of things about people and the world. The pandemic was a lonely time, but I think it's made me realize that you can't give up just because things get hard. I've heard a lot of teens and people my age became depressed instantaneously. Especially on social media, everyday people were only talking about how bad things have gotten instead of trying to keep their spirits up. 26.2 million people have gotten the virus, and 440K people have died, but all of us had to find a way to be happy. In our city(LA) especially, we have higher covid cases than any other place in the county. Even though things are hard now there still are a lot of exciting things to think about.
• 2021-01-31

  My Second COVID Christmas

  My wife and I just had our second COVID Christmas, this time with my mom's side of the family. Because very few on that side can work remotely, almost everyone has had and survived COVID due to work exposures over the past six months. Until we're able to secure vaccines, I also expect at least some of us will have to endure a second round of illness. Having Christmas in January was a strange experience, much like Baseball in November from 2001. I'm glad we finally got to assemble for a few days, and I appreciated most everyone's responsibility with their conduct. My sister is a nurse and treats the pandemic with too little respect. Although she's potentially outside her immunization period, she still acts as though she's chock full of antibodies capable of defeating every new identified strain. AND, she waited until we'd all been together for a full day to reveal her boyfriend has had COVID symptoms for a few days but refuses to be tested. Beyond the drama and anxiety that inspired, I'm grateful to have seen my grandmother, and I'll be even more grateful to know that she doesn't develop signs or symptoms of illness in the coming days. The lesson I learned from this family function is that I can't trust those closest to me to candidly assess the risks those pose to the rest of us. They can't differentiate between their right to make their own health choices and my right to do the same. My understanding was that we had all been sufficiently careful for several weeks to ensure no one would bring COVID to the Christmas celebration, and I was wrong. My bad. I promise it won't happen again, and I won't attend another family function without being vaccinated first, at least not with my sister or a clear, deliberate, and sworn confirmation that everyone I see has been sufficiently cautious. This entire pandemic at this point for me is a balance between mental and physical health, and it turns out they can't both win.
• 
  2021-01-31

  Distracting Myself with Latte Art

  At the moment, the only reasons I leave the house is to shop for essentials and for work. As a barista, my job can get fairly uncomfortable, as there is often a struggle between me and the customer, as they immediately want to remove their mask and take a sip of their drink instead of waiting until they are at a table or outside, or they don't want to wear one at all and refuse to comply when we ask. We also have pushback against limiting indoor seating and maximum capacity of the store, as we do have a small shop that makes it difficult to distance. It has led to tense interactions and anxiety leading up to shifts, and I have been struggling to find reasons to enjoy work. Because of this struggle, I turned towards improving my latte art as a way to both improve my craft and distract myself from the complications and uncomfortable interactions that have disrupted my workplace. It has brought me a sense of productivity and calm, despite the issues pervading the shop. This is my progress so far.
• 2021-01-26

  COVID 19

  It is January 2021 and Covid 19 has now infected almost 100 million people around the world. Although I have not experienced Covid first hand it still effects everyones day to day life, simple things like going to the grocery store or even school put us at risk. Covid 19 was difficult for everybody and my biggest struggle was making sure to keep in touch. I found it was easy with all the time at home to just hide in your bubble. Do online school, finish homework, go outside, watch some television and repeat. It started out like this but as time went on I realized the importance of getting out of routines and trying new things which significantly made my quarantine better. I facetimed friends, did zoom call secret Santa gift exchanges, walked the dogs, reached out to family. Although it was rough, This whole experience truly made me appreciate the small things and learn that going through times like these are really when everyone needs to come together and support one another.
• 
  2020-12-16

  À boute

  French comedian Pierre-Yves Roy-Desmarais sings about the difficulties of quarantine and encourages the public to seek help.
• 
  2020

  Canadian 24-Hour Movement Guidelines For Children and Youth: An integration of Physical Activity, Sedentary Behaviour, and Sleep

  The Canadian Society for Exercise Physiology published guidelines to encourage Canadians of all age groups to maintain their health by pursuing a balanced lifestyle. This comprehensive guide emphasizes the importance of sleep, exercise, and reducing sedentary behaviors.
• 2021-05-01T12:30

  Covid statistics

  In the world there are currently 99.4 million cases and 2.13 million deaths. It's insane that in a little under a year so much damage has been done. The ratio of cases to death doesn't seem too bad if you think of it as numbers. But each number is a person, a person with friends and family who lost their life. In California there are 3.19 million cases, cities like LA with dense population are hotspots for cases. Living in California and very close to LA comes with lots of rules that others states have eased up on. It's hard to grasp the fact that so suddenly we are living through a pandemic. A lot of people have taken this time to improve their life and self but it has also messed up so many peoples lively hoods and metal health. Everyone's adapted to Covid after all this time and things are slowly going back to the original way. Before the first shutdown it was terrifying to think of what the future holds but now its become normal. Its going to feel strange going back. At the end of the day everyone is just trying to keep themselves safe and okay.
• 
  2020-09-10

  Mental Health Care Was Severely Inequitable, Then Came the Coronavirus Crisis

  This article describes how the Covid-19 pandemic has compounded the mental health disparity in the United States. As the title suggests, those suffering from mental illness already did not receive equitable treatment; the pandemic has widened this inequality through a variety of issues, chiefly, disruption of service that was already minimal.
• 
  2020-01-22

  Diary of a Quarantined Teen: 2020-2021 Edition

  Here lies a photo of my monitor, which I believe represents my current experience as a junior in high school. Pictured on the monitor is classwork, the bane of many students going through distance learning. It connects to the pandemic as most, if not all, students are being forced to go online to complete classwork and connect to Zoom classes as we suffer through our teen years. The internet is where many have come to meet new people, find answers, and much more, which all starts through our electronic devices. Personally, my devices have kept me sane since the pandemic first struck, but also became a major source of anxiety. This miracle holds numerous games in which I can release my stress and anger through, such as Valorant and Minecraft. In addition, it allows me to communicate with my friends through Discord, something that most teens utilize. However, it is where I sit for hours starting from as early as 7:30 am, to as late as 3:00 am, just for school. This may not be the healthiest thing to do, especially since all of this occurs in my bedroom, a place that used to be my haven. What was initially my safe space became a source of a multitude of emotions, such as stress, anger, joy, and much more. There is no longer a true feeling of comfort in any place I can think of, which really is the most disappointing part of it all. But, it’s just part of being a quarantined teen, right? During this quarantine, I believe I have changed for the better in most aspects, though my mental health has reached the lowest point it has ever gone. I’ve made so many new friends, something that I believe is somewhat hard for me, so I consider it a significant accomplishment. Most importantly, I have learned to prioritize myself. Although I’m not quite there yet, big decisions take baby steps, and thanks to it, I feel like I’m slowly getting better mentally. Unfortunately, I have also lost and drifted from friends, and lost a few people in my life due to the virus. As much as I want to feel sorry for myself, to just cry and complain about the unfairness of life, almost everyone is going through something due to the pandemic, so the best I can do is to stay silent and keep on pushing.
• 
  2021-01-22

  More Espresso, Less Depresso

  The item that I have chosen that connects to the pandemic was a Starbucks Coffee. The reason why I decided to choose this item is that there are days that learning over zoom is quite a challenge and that it gives so much pressure on me to be able to adapt to this kind of style of learning. With coffee on my hand, I can focus on class more and it makes me more energetic. When I drink coffee during my zoom classes, I tend to be able to participate more. I love caffeine, it encourages me to also be a positive person during these times because, without any coffee, I wouldn’t be able to learn anything from a monitor screen. Coffee best represents my current experience as a junior in high school because there are days that are sad and depressing, and there are days that are happy and bright. Online learning is a cycle, wake up and learn, after that you rest. I have been doing this since MARCH. Again, this is me with coffee because without any coffee, I am really tired and not energetic. When I have my coffee, I am always feeling refreshed and active! Online learning is something that I am not used to and I fear how with the difficulty of learning online, I am not able to understand the lesson which can lead me to bad grades. Hopefully, I will be able to accomplish my goals by staying determined and dedicated to online learning, resulting in a better grade for my classes, (with coffee of course). One word to describe my 2020 year is a challenge. It’s a challenge because there are things I have been through, like losing my grandpa who sadly passed away due to a heart attack and not being able to visit him because of COVID. COVID was mainly the reason why my 2020 was a challenge because I have to figure out new ways to keep myself happy and motivating. Online classes have made me less motivated because it didn’t feel the same and that everything was quite last minute last year. I wasn’t able to keep up with lessons, which discouraged me to continue and of course my grandpa’s sudden death. As from my experiences, the various holidays looked the same for me this year. Christmas and Thanksgiving were the same because I usually hang out with my family. When I do my online classes, I usually have a workspace. Since I know for a fact I am going to sit in one place for the next 9 hours, I have my coffee next to me to keep me up, I have my water, some chapstick, a big monitor screen, my textbooks, and my journals. I also have an office chair with a pad seat cushion for me to be comfortable! Even though those were the basic items on my quarantine workspace, I like to keep things simplistic. I only have things that are essential for me to use for working online, so I am not bothered by that. The three things that I would include in my quarantine survival kit would be some energy drinks, chapstick, and a pen with a journal. The reason why I chose these items is that for the first two, I cannot do anything without them! It’s great to have a lot of energy to do tasks, and some chapstick to have my lips not chapped. I also wanted to bring a pen and journal to describe my experiences in quarantine. I would also use that journal to write down things that bother me and things that I am appreciative of. Words do mean a lot, so I love to express my feelings in a journal to remind me that overall in time, things can get better.
• 
  2021-01-22

  Reliving my Life as a 6 Year Old

  You know, I don’t see much difference between the lifestyle I’m living right now and to the one I was living 10 years ago. 6 year old Me’s daily routine: Wake up: check Do school work at my desk: check Mope around the house: check Annoy my siblings: check Attempt and fail at anything in the kitchen: check Look outside my bedroom window and daydream: check Draw and doodle endlessly: check Want to see my friends: check Think about what I want to be in the future: check Sleep without expecting much the next day: check This year was horrible. There is, of course, covid happening and political events and natural disasters and death. The world and society is constantly changing and shaping due to the actions of people, possibly in the worst way possible, while all I’m doing is sitting in my room, looking out to the vast blue sky. And I have a confession: I feel like I’m missing out on everything. I KNOW I SHOULDN’T BE SAYING I’M MISSING OUT ON CONTRIBUTING TO THE WORST YEAR POSSIBLE, but I just miss the other not-so-horrible things in life such as experiencing highschool (debatable though), meeting new people (also very debatable), going out for the day, traveling to see family and friends; you know, making memories, having fun, the things that make life worth living. For the past few years of my life, like any teen going through adolescence, I’ve met hardships, failures, tears, but during this lockdown, I’ve haven’t felt any of those things in a while. The same goes for the successes, the excitement, and the joy-- it’s been a while since I’ve felt those too. My life at the moment has reached a straight. Life is supposed to have its bumps - its highs and lows-- a road with unprecedented surprises, but I’ve been going through life as if I’ve pressed autopilot, set to one direction. Time is passing all around me and I’ve been on this one way road, destined to who knows where, and I haven’t done much to enjoy life for what it truly is. However, my situation hasn’t been nearly as bad as others though and I’m truly grateful for that. One thing I won’t ever regret doing is resisting the urge to go out. I’ve been tempted a few times, but I’ve stayed quarantined from others-- you know the one thing that we all should be doing. I’m glad to say that I haven’t put my family, my friends, my neighbors, heck, random strangers’ lives at danger and I’m going to keep doing this until things finally boil down. The last thing I want to do is change someone’s life for the worst. Though it sounds like I’m all gloomy and what not, I don’t think quarantine was a complete waste of time. I’ve been able to sit and reflect in my own thoughts-- the one thing I’ve been trying to avoid. Like I said in the beginning, the life I’m living now is nostalgic of my 6 year old self. Not like the goldfish crackers and PBS kids TV shows kind of way, but the experiences I’m reliving. The last years of my life have been hectic and I’ve been striving for self improvement. I haven’t really sat down and let those experiences marinate. I’ve been doing, doing, doing, but I haven’t asked myself the true reasons for my actions. Self improvement, development of my character, blah, blah, blah, everyone says that stuff, but I’ve asked myself what DO I truly aim for: an end goal? A life goal? Why did I do the things I did back then, and how would they affect me now and later. Thus I revert back to my 6 year old self-- curious about what I want to be in the future and learning what it is to be a good person. I’ve come to realize my many flaws and rethink my mistakes and actions I’ve acted in the past. I’ve come to realize some of the things I did back then and the things I do now aren’t very nice-- for others and myself. Sometimes I’m too judgemental, I overthink things, I’m brash, I take things for granted, I do things for my own benefit-- heck, I can keep listing. To say the least, I’ve become more self-aware. Things aren’t all rosey posey and sunshine and rainbows-- quarantine helped me back down to earth and analyze my own character. I’ve also begun to realize the small things. Not my patience, but the things that give me joy. The nature in my backyard, windy days, my favorite nail polish, hot meals. I’ve been on this 1 track mind for so long that quarantine has made me stop and find joy, even the slightest bit of it, in things I would normally overlook-- the things my 6 year old self would smile for the brim for. I guess it hasn’t been all that bad. Could be better since I miss seeing people THAT aren’t constantly nagging my name to do the dishes, but hey, at least I’ve got my family to entertain me. I don’t know if we’re going out of quarantine anytime soon, but we did just get out of 2020. Cheers to 2021- maybe it’ll get better, maybe it’ll get worse, but hey it’s going to be quite a ride. Hope you enjoyed reading my brain dump and wish me luck as I try to tackle my kitchen; I am very determined to make both something at least edible and some new memories I can look back on.
• 
  2021-01-20

  The Bed of Growth

  My bed has been a significant part for the past 10 months. It's where I had my sleepless nights, a place where I cried, a corner that held my dreams, and most importantly a place of comfort. Throughout this pandemic, my bed has given me comfort that I couldn't get from my friends due to distancing. It's been my new happy place, a place where I resort to when I undergo stress. I've done lots of growing and thinking during this time, mostly in the late hours of the nights while everyone was asleep. Going through this pandemic has been hard on my teenage mind, but it has helped me become a better person. Though this pandemic has been hard on the whole world, it's changed the way I think and the mindset that I've gained throughout the past year is something I wouldn't give up.
• 2021-01-20

  The Rules of Covid

  This time of fear called the Coronavirus came with many rules and restrictions, many being annoying and unpleasant. During this epidemic we have had to wear masks to prevent us from spreading the disease through the air. Another restriction that have to follow is staying six feet apart from other people as to prevent getting the disease through close contact. At the time of writing this I would say that the whole world is sick and tired of having to seclude ourselves from other people. It has gotten to the point where many people are lonely and depressed.
• 
  2021-01-20

  Mental Health Gone Crazy

  Throughout quarantine, I can feel my mental health decrease. As time go by, my confidence went down and I lost motivation. I don't have confidence in my work or the things that I used to do. I don't feel motivated to do my homework or motivated to take care of myself. Instead of talking about it with others, I would rather keep it to myself because I don't want to be a bother and it's hard to convert my thoughts into actual words. Whenever I would feel down and want to let my inner thoughts out, I would pour my emotions out into my diary. It honestly feels relaxing and it felt like weight have been lifted.
• 2021-01-19

  COVID 19: Rules

  When the Covid 19 pandemic began, many rules were put in place. Some were not happy with these new restrictions, some were excited for certain laws, but one thing is for certain: nearly all of the rules are necessary. If these rules were not put into place, the death toll would have increased dramatically. I, for one, am thankful that the guidelines were put into place, but that doesn't mean I have to enjoy some of them. For instance, it is uncomfortable for me to wear a mask every time I step outside, but I still wear it for the greater good of saving lives. However, there were a few orders I was actually happy to carry out. One of the main orders that I had no problem following, and I'm sure many of my peers will agree, was doing school virtually. I enjoyed it because I got to spend more time with my family, and as an extra bonus I had extra time to finish homework. Of course, I still think physical school was important, but virtual school was a fun experience. Overall, I am glad that the new regulations were put in place to slow the spread of Covid 19.
• 
  2021-01-17

  Entering 2021

  2020 was rough. I don’t want 2021 to be a repeat. This is my hope for 2021. This is what I hope to accomplish this year to keep myself motivated.
• 2021-01-11

  COVID

  A conversation I had probably back in February was with my dad. We had talked about what would happen if the virus came over here to America. He said that the stock market would crash, people would panic and go to mass hysteria, we would obviously have to quarantine too along with not letting people into stores and such. It did worry me at first but I had my doubts of much happening, although there still was a part of me that believed it would happen. But now that we're here I'm surprised he was able to accurately guess what would happen if the virus did come over here. When it first arrived, everyone panicked and stock piled on toilet paper or whatever, the stock market has been doing bad but I think it's gotten better, we were in quarantine for a while and those of us who are sick are still doing self quarantine. The stores and restaurants now have opened back up, some maybe just for pick up and stuff. The self quarantine has changed me a lot though, it really affected me negatively along with a lot of my friends and people I know. The stress and anxiety of just everything going on has worsened my mental state by a lot.
• 2021-01-07

  Covid-19

  My first memory of Covid-19 was in late December of 2019. I was sitting on my couch watching TV when I heard my dad in the other room talking to my mom about how the new "coronavirus" desiese was getting worse in China. I was shocked at first about what he was talking about, so I went into the next room to ask him what was going on. He explained to me how there was an epidemic going on in China, and how some people have died. It all seemed very new and since it was all the way in China I wasn't very concerned with it other than thinking that it must be scary for residents of China. Fast forward a few weeks when we get back to school, lots of kids in the hallways were making jokes about the disease that was spreading, and were saying things like, "Don't forget to use hand sanitizer cuz of corona." Up until mid march the jokes kept on running, and the epidemic in China became more and more of a big deal. Until the night before march 14, 2020 everything was still a joke, and the rumor of us doing online school from home was still a running joke. But on the night of march 13 we all got an email telling us that we'd be doing virtual school from home for the next two weeks. The following Monday we started online school, and we all thought it would just be for two weeks. I was up in my room all day, and we only got short breaks in between classes. The first week everyone seemed to enjoy it was we had to use zoom calls for our class periods. The second week of school everyone including myself started not liking the idea of virtual school as much. Even though we got to sleep in later, people were sick of sitting at a desk almost all day long. Soon enough they extended our time we would be doing school from home because of a pandemic for longer. The coronavirus had spread to the U.S. and most people rarely left the house except to go to the grocery store because everything was closed. Whenever my mom or dad would go to the store they would wear a mask and gloves to make sure they didn't catch any germs. Lots of other people did the same. By this time almost the entire country was in lockdown. It had grown into a full-blown pandemic; other countries like Italy we also bombarded with the panic of Covid-19. Everything was a complete disaster just by mid-april. I had no idea when we would be going back to school, or when things would return to normal. I still don't as a matter of fact. by this time I thought we'd go back in may, but we didn't. In the first couple weeks of may, just a few days before my 13th birthday, everyone at this point hated online school, it was dreaded by children across the country. This gradually got worse and worse, teenagers' mental heath was tanking by a landslide. Quarantine was now taking over my life completely. Most days I would sit in my room the entire day even on weekends since we couldn't go anywhere. Throughout June was probably the worst moth for my metal heath, and I think many others would agree. Saying we were bored would be an understatement; I wasn't depressed much like a quite a few of my other friends ,as far as I'm concerned, but it felt like all of our happiness and livelihood had been taken from us since what we started lockdown. Soon after, in July things started to open up again, the cases for covid-19 were getting lower(which was good), and people basically assumed quarantine was over. The nest month since things were opening up previously we all thought we would go back to school, but a few days before school was supposed to start we were informed that we wouldn't be going back, and we had to continue with online school. I was extremely disappointed, and I thought hopefully we'd go back by at least October. The following months through Christmas break we stayed in online school, and almost nothing happened. I spent my days the exact same as the day before I would sit in my room do school and then look on my phone or listen to music(mostly One Direction, The Beatles, and 80's music). My life became dark, boring, and quiet. By this time everyone was so fed up with quarantine, since we had been in lockdown for the past 9 months. Even Christmas felt different this year; usually I'm super excited and this year I almost didn't even care about the holiday's and I can't explain why. I'm currently writing this on January 7, 2021 at 9:05 pm. We've luckily gone back to school yesterday for the first time in ten months. There are plenty of safety precautions to make sure none of us get sick like: wearing a mask, social distancing( staying 6 feet away from people), and there are even certain ways to we have to walk around hallways and the campus to keep us in order. I can already feel a change in myself since we went back yesterday. It already feels like things are getting better now that we don't have to do virtual school with zoom calls for classes. I'm also really glad I get to see my friends, and hopefully make some new ones. If there's anything I've learned from being a part of the current pandemic it's that you can't give up or give in to other things going on with the world or even within your own life. No matter how tuff things you have to remember who you are and what you want to be. If anyone in the distant future is reading this I want them to know that, and how lucky they are to be apart of something as wonderful as life can be. I found myself more often than never longing for the past hoping for answers, only to find out the past is inside all of us, and even when the hardships of reality kick in you have to remember how amazing it is to get to experience something as rare and beautiful as life is. So don't take things for granted and appreciate every moment because you'll never know when something as mind-boggling as a world-wide pandemic will happen to you. Long story short never give up on your hopes and fantasies; it might just be the thing you'll need the most.
• 
  2020-12-05

  Being a 25-year Suicide Survivor and my QPR (Question Persuade Refer) Suicide Prevention Training Save a Life of a Total Stranger 2000 miles away

  I just wanted to send you the story about meeting Chaz Ah You, the young man that went from a total stranger to another son. He is a football player at BYU. It was a very emotional meeting but one I'll never forget and treasure ALWAYS. I was able to save Chaz's life through divine intervention and QPR Suicide Prevention Training. That is why we can't sugarcoat the importance of addressing suicide prevention head-on. It's not a comfortable conversation nor is it warm and fuzzy, but we have to have those uncomfortable conversations to become comfortable to evoke change. I am so glad Chaz is here. We will continue to have these uncomfortable conversations to change not only how people view suicide but to educate and break down the walls of stigma to STOP suicide. Have some tissues when you view this story. Everyone should take QPR Suicide Prevention Training! It saves lives! 25-years ago, my Aunt Kellie nicknamed "Aunt Spankie" saved my life when I called and told her, "She could have my shoes," she didn't hesitate to have me involuntarily committed. She's a HERO in my eyes because she did whatever it took to save my life. She didn't worry about me getting mad at her, my mother, or my grandmother being mad. As bad as February 14th, 1995, was to be involuntarily committed, handcuffed, and taken to a mental health facility, it saved my life and started me on the long road to recovery. It also awakened me to help others like me, especially in my culture and people of color. Mental health isn't one size fits all. Today, I'm a board member with NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) NC, a volunteer with AFSP (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention), MHA (Mental Health America) of Central Carolinas, an NC certified Peer Support Specialist, a certified Mental Health First Aid for Youth Instructor and a certified QPR (Question Persuade Refer) Suicide Prevention Instructor. When the Governor of NC issued the Stay Home Order in March, I was given the opportunity to do QPR Suicide Prevention Training online. I had no idea I was going to train so many. I started training on March 26th, through May 30th and trained 600 people from 23 states and 5 countries for FREE. I took a break in June and started back training in July, finishing on December 19th. To date, I have trained over 1000 people from 24 states and 5 countries . I am not done. I plan on continuing my quest to stop suicide through paid and free training online until the QPR Institute tells us to stop training online and go back to face to face. That's over 1000 people that are now certified "Gatekeepers that can and will save a life through positive action while providing HOPE. I have trained people from all walks of life, sports psychologists, directors of sports medicine, directors of nutrition, teachers, a congressional aid, social workers, student-athletes, pastors, an NFL player, therapists, social workers, college professors, 10-D1 college football coaches (Michigan, AZ, Wake Forest, BYU, Navy, Perdue, and others) former Charlotte Mayor, Jennifer Roberts, DA Spencer Merriweather, 36 nursing students from NCCU, sorority sisters (AKA & ZETA), colleges students, two CBS News producers, a CBS News reporter, a local news reporter, nurses, an entire college conference (Sunshine State Conference), 56 student-athletes from the Sunshine State Conference, 80 student-athletes from WSSU, a Native American reservation, directors of sports wellness, numerous college athletic trainers (Carolina, Ohio State, UMASS, Liberty University, Howard University, South Carolina, UCF, UT, Clemson, High Point University, UVA, UGA, WSSU, FAMU, Notre Dame College, UMass, and Eastern Washington to name a few) and many others have taken the training. In an hour and a half, that is how long the training is, I can train anyone how to recognize someone in crisis or suicidal, talk and listen to them in a nonjudgmental way and help them to get the help they need all the while providing HOPE and positive interaction. The training teaches you that anyone can save a life while being positive and providing HOPE. I also use my own suicide attempt to dispel the stigma that surrounds mental health and to show you can get the help you need, you can recover and you can have a good life. You don't have to be a professional to save a life. You just have to care.
• 2020-12-17

  Searching for Spirituality

  I turned 19 years old just before the pandemic hit. 2020 marked my last year as a teenager, and I had spent the beginning of the year searching within myself for who I really was, flaws and all. I worked on becoming more self-aware. Then the pandemic hit. When my entire life was derailed, I felt this overwhelming need to search for meaning. Growing up, I was raised agnostic. I didn't know what I believed in, and it frustrated me. Since I had more free time on my hands, I decided to research the religions and faiths that I had been interested in. These included Judaism and Paganism. I came about Paganism because I was quite interested in witchcraft which has strong ties to Pagan traditions. Judaism was always a religion I admired. From when I was a child singing Hannukah songs to listening to my Jewish friends talk about their faith, I felt oddly connected to the religion. The pandemic may have derailed my life and put my aspirations on hold, but it has also allowed me the opportunity to search for what I believe in. I have felt an emptiness since I was a child yearning for belief. I still haven't figured it out yet, but I hope that one day when this pandemic is long forgotten, I will find myself and feel at peace.
• 2020-09-22

  2020-09-22 covid summer

  This journal entry was written as a part of the American Studies class at California High School in San Ramon, California. Over the summer i guess i did change quite a bit. The main thing that changed was really my hobbies or rather, my newfound disinterest in my old set of hobbies. I always took my hobby far too seriously and it turns out that when i didn’t have any pressure to keep pursuing it, i kind of dislike it a bit. I had a bit of an existential crisis over it but it’s been nice to take a break.. I’ve also gotten used to school a lot better. I’m a lot more responsible nowadays and i have no missing work so that’s nice. It’s partly because of all the time i don’t use up on my hobby but it’s mostly that i just find find it fun to organize my computer. Now that i think about it i really don’t want school to start. I won’t have the choice to stay home because then i’d lose touch with my friends but I’ll really miss not being mentally drained from talking to strangers. There’s also the fact that i don’t want my room to be filled up with papers that i’ll just stare at become overwhelmed by. There’s just so many reasons that i don't want to go back to in-person.
• 
  2020-08-10

  Seeing the Shades

  It is human nature to ignore somethings over others through the application of selective attention. According to human psychology, we tend to focus on information that we think matters more while ignoring the presumed irrelevant details. The same applies to colors. They are flamboyant, bringing out the best, most salient parts of objects. However, they are merely as alluring without the shades, the easily ignored parts that make objects pop. If you were to ask me before the pandemic COVID-19, what the utensil that produces shades means to me, I’d probably tell you schoolwork. It means working on an assignment in Spanish class, drafting an artwork for art class. It’s something that blends into my life, something so easily accessible that I had ignored. COVID-19 inspired me to expand my selective attention, giving me an opportunity to deal with my personal crisis. It allowed me to realize the importance of shades. Pencils are typical. They have long and narrow bodies, a burgundy pinkish eraser on the top, and a greyish carbon tip. It’s everywhere, in school, stores, houses…So obtainable that people tend to disregard its essentiality. Before the COVID crisis, I use a pencil mostly under instructions: “use a pencil to darken circles for this section”, “please use a pencil to do the annotations”, “always draft your artwork with a pencil”. It had been an object that I associate with obligations and restraints. I enjoy socializing and being in crowded locations. Deep down, I know that spending time with others provides me an excuse to not face “me”. Being accompanied by technology since my early childhood, it’s easy to feel lost and hollow when I’m idling around; when I’m truly alone with myself. I didn’t like being with myself because I know I would overthink. So, I used to go out whenever I could. It is a personal crisis that I have avoided and procrastinated on fixing. Coincidentally, the pandemic happened, and I was forced to quarantine in my house, with me. As a member of Generation Z, I spent most of the first two months immersed in technology: Tik Tok, Instagram, and YouTube. I used all my time absorbing useless information online, to fill the emptiness I feel from lack of social stimuli. Until one day when I was spacing out at my desk, thinking which information dump to go to next, I noticed my pencil lying on the table. I picked it up, with nothing in mind, I started scribbling on a piece of paper. The products are in all forms, intersecting with each other but not showing any outline of specific objects. They are abstracts piled together. It struck me as I realized the freeing side of pencil. When you press it on to the paper lightly, the shade that comes out is lighter, and vice versa. I understood that I have control over the pencil and over what I want to do. Not some structured art assignment that tells me to have a meaning in my artwork, to go with the norms of art. It’s a language of my own. When I see the overcrowded lines, I feel the noisiness; when I see spaced lines, I feel the indifference and coldness. That day, I spent the entire afternoon scribbling and looking at lines and shapes that I had created with a pencil. A language is forming. Being focused on my “language”, I registered my change as I started tuning out my anxious and overthinking self. I am feeling the present, because every single line, is controlled by me. I need to stay focused on expressing my feelings through lines. One might ask why I wouldn’t write journals instead, that way I can articulate my feelings more intentionally. But writing is restrained, you have grammatical and spelling structures to follow. There are so many rules to adhere to in order to let the future you look back and be able to understand what the present you are trying to say. That’s exhausting. I started to use pencil to scribble every day before I go to bed. It’s refreshing, almost like a personal space where I express all my feelings that I’ve experienced in the day. Through utilizing my pencil, I can appreciate the beauty in gradient of shades, the beauty of my consciousness. I consider penciling the medium that allows me to connect with myself and be more aware of my thoughts and feelings. Even though pencil can only produce monochromatic colors, they mean color to me. It is my form of communication with myself. I’ve been out with my friends several times after quarantine. But now, I no longer feel the constant need to be accompanied by someone to be distracted from my thoughts. I’ve learned how to respect my personal space and alone time. A clear line between my “me time” and my socializing times is established. This change for me is immaculate as I change the lens I use to see the world in, but this time, with more self-consciousness with it. Pencil helped me comprehend the importance of self-acceptance and appreciation of the unnoticeable things in life. It made me more conscious of my surrounding as I continuously try to seek things that I’ve taken for granted or have ignored. It freed me from my personal crisis, giving color to my world through shades.
• 
  2020-11-24

  Conditions in Hospitals

  An article from the Globe and Mail about the conditions hospitals workers experience.
• 
  2020-09-09

  Crisis Line in a Pandemic

  An article from the Aboriginal Peoples Television Network (APTN) about the importance of crisis phone lines to mental health in Indigenous communities
• 
  2020-12-03

  Worsening Mental Health in NB as Pandemic Causes Stress

  A statement from the Canadian Mental Health Association concerning the negative impacts the pandemic is having on mental health in Canada
• 
  2020-04-11

  Mental Health Check-ins for People Isolating in Nunavut

  An article from Canadian Broadcasting Corporation about mental health workers in Nunavut trying to support people in self-isolation
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  2020

  Chief Public Health Officer Orders

  Orders from the Chief Public Health Officer or Nunavut and video to remind the public to take care of themselves, adapt, and stay safe.