Items

• 
  2021-01-16

  TOMMY CHURCH! I ONLY MISS U WHEN IM BREATHING DADDY!

  I used to tell my dad if I had to choose between loving you and my last breath daddy, I would use my last breath to tell u I loved you! Then he got covid and I tried to give him one of my lungs. I would of given him both of them. I never got to touch him.ir comfort him only look at him thru glass. He had to be all alone to die. If I could if touched him I felt as thou I could of healed him as touch is more powerful then one will ever know. My dad was the most kindest helpful and giving man I have ever known. He will never be forgotten. Rising him the way covid took him has left a hole forever in my heart.
• 
  2020-03

  Some moments from March and April, 2020

  At the beginning of the 2020 COVID pandemic, I was a Sophomore in college. My friends and I had heard about the strange sickness that was spreading to the western states and after a few weeks, we realized that we might get sent home from college. The night we learned that we were leaving, it absolutely POURED rain. I was working at the front desk of my dormitory watching girls scream down the sidewalk to try to get to the dry dorm. Then, a salamander crawled through the front door. I was so shocked. After that, I raced around campus with a friend and got completely drenched. I loved it. When we got back to the dorm, a group of girls were leaning out of their 3rd-floor window reading off an email from the university to a group of boys standing outside. We were being sent home. I was devastated and cried on the phone to my parents. The two videos show a group of chickens my family and I got and my studying habits and how much I missed being with friends and outside of the house.
• 2022-11-08

  The Sunset of covid-19

  My experience with Covid 19 was all over the place. If I were to describe it in one word it would be chaos. I remember going to Kingsborough Community College at the time and just everything shutting down and not knowing what to do. I remember all my classes turning into online classes. During this time, my mother fell ill with covid before any vaccines came out. I remember seeing how ill and bedridden she was. I was scared My mother was going to pass away and started bawling my eyes out to brother. Covid hit alot of my family and I started to become depressed. I ended up dropping all my classes because mentally I was not there. Eventually, my mother and other family members recovered, but some were not so lucky. An old friend from down the block lost their mother to covid. We used to practice karate together as kids with my brothers and her brother. Her mother was Sandra Santos-Vizcaino the first NYC public teacher to die of covid 19. I used to know their mother from the karate tournament and block parties we went to so finding out she passed away made me realize how lucky I was with my family. After all of this I got motivation again to start doing something with my life because at this point i was just rotting in my room for a few months. I ended up finding a job at a covid hotel in queens where I had to always wear a mask, gloves, vizor, etc. I was working alongside some doctors and nurses. It was such a different experience from anything I worked at before. Covid 19 had such a significant impact on everyone's lives and will forever leave a scar in many family's hearts.
• 
  2021-02-17

  It took my world

  This is a photograph of my best friend, my mother. In December of 2020, we went to Disneyworld and came back with Covid-19. I was barely pregnant at the time, but my Covid symptom was only a cough. This cough would only hurt my uterus, so when I started to miscarry, I wasn’t too surprised. My mom, on the other hand, thought that her muscles were sore from walking around the parks for a few days. She had a cough and a bit of a fever, but was still walking around the house as we quarantined together. She was cold, which only ever happened when she was sick. One day, she didn’t leave her room because she was struggling to catch her breath if she did too much. She had me turn the heater on for her because of how cold she was under her blankets and comforter. She had been keeping her C-PAP machine on to give her the extra air support, but when we checked her oximeter, it was only at 70. So I called the paramedics like she asked me to, they came, we met them at the door, her vitals were taken, and they said that I could take her to the hospital or they could. I told her that I would drive. I had to take her to the emergency room that was not in our normal network because that’s what was open. I took her there with the expectation of getting her transferred the next day. When we called, the other hospital couldn’t take her because all of their beds were filled. So, she stayed there, and I couldn’t be with her because they were trying to keep the spread down. She was texting and FaceTiming me for the first 4 days that she was in the emergency room. On the 5th day though, she stopped responding. I called the hospital and they told me that she had spoken to her doctor and they had decided to put her on the ventilator to give her body a break for a few days. It was not a few days. On day 39 of her being on the ventilator, they lowered her sedation medication and she had no eye movement. So, I told them to let my brother go in and say his second final goodbye and to call me when they had ended her fight the next day. They called and said that she took a few seconds off of the ventilator before they called the time of her passing. I was alone now. My dad passed away in 2006 and my brother was a technical part of my family, but it was just me and my mom in the house still. Now, it was just me. A year later, I lost my home because I couldn’t get a loan approval to buy out my brother’s half of the equity. At that time, I was pregnant again with the baby girl that my mom dreamt of me having. This child that she had planned to be overly involved with, to play with, to snuggle, to kiss, and to have memories and adventures with. But now, the nursery would be someone else’s room. A stranger. Covid-19 took my baby, my mom, my house, my stability, and my will to love. I have been able to love my baby girl, but I am always comparing myself to my mother and thinking about how she could’ve been the best grandma. How she would’ve helped me. How we would’ve traveled to so many places together. And now, I struggle to pay rent on a single room. I leave my child at daycare 5 days a week and try to keep her there for each meal in case I don’t have enough to feed her. And I hide away from a lot of socializing because my mom was my favorite person to hang out with.
• 2021-09-24

  How COVID-19 affected me and my family

  September 24th 2021. It was just another normal day in the new pandemic experience, most of my day was spent on Zoom doing online classes for about four hours of the day. Today was different because I had an orthodontist appointment to finally have my braces removed after about 2.5 years of them on. As almost everyone else, I was finally excited to have my braces taken off and actually see my new smile. So after my 2 classes my mom drove me to the orthodontist and left me in the office to go run other errands. After leaving to do so, I had gotten my braces remove in what was really fast time compared to what I had envisioned. So when I had finished up and scheduled a future appointment for my retainer fitting I called my mom to see when she was going to pick me up and no response. I left a message and then called my dad. Again no response. I texted him and he said, “(Name) come home by bus. Mom had to go” I didn’t think much of it so I took the bus home. After I got home I called out in the house and had no response so I walked in normally, taking off my shoes and sweater. I walked into my parents bedroom and seen my parents on the bed. My mom almost curled up teary eyed and tissues next to her. My dad sitting on the edge of the bed next to her holding the tissue box. Obviously with the circumstances of that time, my heart sunk thinking someone died. COVID-19 is known to be fairly hard on the geriatric population so when my grandma from my mothers side had gotten it the night before, we were all on edge. My mom didn’t say a word, so my dad took me outside the room and said something. I still to this day can’t recall what he was saying and I just walked away. To this day I’ve been afraid to ask of the specifics, all I know was that she was alone in the hospital because of the country she was in had strict hospital visitation policies. I still don’t know how to deal with these emotions because honestly she was the person I loved the most second to my mother. She helped raise me and made me into the man I am today. Thank You وداد
• 
  2020-06-04

  HIST30060: Loneliness

  The past three years have been incredibly lonely. I've included here a picture of my younger brother on his 18th birthday: a picture I find eerily reminiscent of Edward Hopper's Realist paintings from the 40s and 50s. My brother has always been the most popular person in any room, constantly surrounded by friends, a real party animal. But on his 18th, he was alone (with me and my parents) and couldn't celebrate in the way he would have liked. Since then, he has had a makeup party, but it isn't the same. He also finished high school during this period, and god I feel sorry for the classes of 2020 and 2021. It is easy to be sorry for myself, who has only experienced university through the lens of a post-COVID world, but I was fortunate enough to celebrate my 18th with my friends, finish high-school not on zoom, go to schoolies and travel on a gap year before we were prevented by the pandemic. Poor Sam didn't get any of that, and that really makes me sad.
• 
  2020-03-21

  Education changed

  It was my first year teaching middle school history. I was bright-eyed, excited, and felt like I had finally found my calling in life. I went into spring break with such an excited feeling about my new career path. Coming from retail, I could finally have time to spend with my family and not have to worry about making a quota. Then the email came. We would be moving to distance learning and I would not get the chance to finish my first year as an educator with my first group of kids. The sound I most remember was the Google Meets login when someone joined. That sound will forever be associated with the pandemic. The sound I had never heard before became the sound that brought me joy as I was finally able to make sure my students were okay. I remember that sound and immediately checking to see who was logging in. It brought mixed feelings of compassion, empathy, and sadness. Even as we started to get back into the classroom, nothing would ever be the same as it once was. But that sound, that one quick sound, brought on the emotions of this educator. And I hope I will never have to hear that sound again.
• 
  2022-07-02

  Taking Care of My Grandma During COVID

  This is a story of taking care of my grandma during COVID. A lot of the time I was employed as a caretaker for my grandma overlapped with the height of COVID.
• 
  2020

  Family triumphs

  My parents are very scared of covid, they are in their fifties with a six year old at home. Due to this, I wasn’t allowed to even be home from the time I was a freshman to this day two years later as a junior. I just miss my family. Pictures and FaceTime isn’t enough for me.
• 
  2020-04-01

  Worst April Fool’s Day

  My employer ended every person's contract in a zoom call, somewhere around 100 of us. We were all students. The ending of our contracts meant we all lost our housing since we worked for a university (this was before I was attending ASU). We were given until Sunday to have all of our belongings moved out and our keys returned, or we could pay the multiple thousands of dollars that on-campus housing would cost. Hardly any of us could afford that, some of my friends suddenly had to grapple with the idea that they would be in debt, broke, or homeless in a matter of four days. I was one of the lucky ones as I had a place to go. 1 sleepless night. 4 days. 4 trips back and forth. 11 ½ hours driving in silence. $20 spent on one final dinner with my friends and coworkers. $25 spent on moving supplies. $52 spent on gas. 506 miles. 11 ½ hours driving in silence. I drove in silence, I couldn’t handle trying to listen to anything. I couldn’t allow myself to hear a sad song and get caught up in it, or worse hear something happy and get upset that I wasn’t feeling that way. The sound of my tires on the poorly maintained interstate for what felt like truly endless hours is something I will never forget and is something that will never leave me. Rattling over pot holes, turn signals, avoiding other drivers, sitting in traffic, the sound of my new tires being worn in very quickly. This story is not unique. Countless people lost their jobs, lost their homes, lost their livelihoods during the initial shutdown. I was simply one of so many, but I was privileged enough to have a place to land. The sound of driving, the action of having to move, and the feeling of sadness, frustration, or loss due to a sudden change in life is something that I think is relatable for a lot of people during the pandemic. Audio description: Recording of the sound of my car taking the last exit off the highway into my town
• 2021-12-04

  Grief and Loss in a Pandemic

  Most consider dying during the pandemic the end of the story, but for my family and myself, the death of my sister was the undoing of our culture. On March 13, 2021, just over a year since Covid-19 was declared a pandemic, my younger sister took her own life after a life-long battle with epilepsy, anxiety, depression, and PTSD. She was the youngest of my five siblings, aunt to fourteen nieces and nephews, and mother to two sons. My entire family, with the exception of one sister, all live within minutes of one another. Although we were raised as a close-knit family, disagreements had developed, resentments grew, and we all allowed “social distancing” to justify our lack of contact and communication for almost the entire year. And just like the rest of the nation, our family was divided by political and pandemic beliefs. As I mentioned above, my sister overcame her relentless struggles every day for almost forty years and on March 13, 2021, she lost that battle. Since that day, we have all theorized how the isolation brought on by the pandemic must have played a major role. However, we are only left with assumptions as she didn’t leave a note. What I do know for certain, is my family and I had no idea how to grieve during the pandemic. Social distancing, occupancy restrictions, stay-at-home orders and mask mandates challenged every aspect of how our Hispanic culture grieves. After an entire year of living in isolation, coming together as family, came with conflicted feelings of cultural proclivity and the health of our loved ones. As my family rushed to my parents’ home upon hearing the tragic news, there was a twinge of apprehension as we sought comfort one another’s arms. By midafternoon, their home was overcome with family overwhelmed with anguish, while instinctively gauging six feet distance. While notifying friends and family, tears and words of comfort gave way to requests to leave a note at the makeshift shrine in the front yard in lieu coming inside. Making arrangements meant we had to settle for any location willing to allow all forty of us at the memorial. Non-family members would only be allowed to walk through to say their last good-bye, once the family left the building to not exceed occupation restrictions. The cemetery would only allow fifteen people at the gravesite, not the dozens of friends and family who wanted to share their condolences. My mom, still reeling with loss, wanted to include those she loved and who loved my sister and chose a plot next to the street so the other family members could stand off the property while my sister was laid to rest. Following the burial, instead of opening our home and coming together to celebrate her life, we selected a secret location that wouldn’t be known to non-family members. Nine months later, despite continued cases and deaths, Covid restrictions have lessened and most people have resumed their lives as they were pre-Covid. For my family and I, losing my sister still feels unreal. I saw her in her final resting place, but grieving in my culture looks and feels so different than what I experienced. We find comfort and healing in community and in each other’s arms. We open our home to friends and family and welcome their offerings of condolences. We come together to share food, memories, and loss and we find healing. The pandemic unraveled all we knew about how to deal with loss, and the grief remains in isolation, unable to transition into acceptance.
• 
  2020-04-16

  Covid Consolation Puppy

  A week after the first shutdown began in March of 2020, schools were shut down and I was no longer able to complete my student teaching. I was furloughed from my job and locked inside for what we originally thought would be two weeks. With no end to the lockdown in sight and nothing to do, it became stressful and quite boring. Living with my parents at the time, the entire family was locked inside and tensions were high. One day, my mom got a call from a former coworker whose dog had just had puppies a month prior. She offered us a puppy and my mom, knowing how sad I was at not having a job or an internship, accepted and I was able to pick any puppy I wanted. Freyja, my dog, was my Covid-consolation-puppy. She was very young and I was up all night and all day with her, potty training and playing with her. My time was entirely consumed by this puppy and I was never bored or alone again. We joke that she was a consolation puppy because I never got to complete the typical training any teacher before received. A few months after the first shut down ASU canceled graduation and went virtual, it was another blow, and knowing I would not be able to walk the stage to get my degree was tough to handle. However, Freyja made things easier and took my mind off things. She grew with me and she became my best friend and protector. When I moved out, she kept me safe. When I separated from a long-term partner, she was what I found joy in. I love my dog very much because she came into my life when I needed her most.
• 
  2021-10-04

  Ashley Pierce Oral History, 2021/10/04

  A quick comment about Law Enforcement during the pandemic.
• 
  2021-10-03

  Ending High School at the Beginning of a Pandemic

  All of the fun memories that are normally reminisced upon later were replaced with stories of disappointment. My last two months of high school were basically stolen from me. COVID-19 stole the fun events that I deserved and worked twelve hard years for. A time that should have been filled with excitement and fun-filled memories with friends turned into memories of disappointment and separation. Everything that I was looking forward to at the end of high school was canceled. There was no in-person school, all sporting events, senior trips, prom, and graduation were canceled. The world turned virtual. I spent my days attending classes through Zoom not being able to truly interact with my classmates. I missed going out to get lunch with my friends and walking down the hallways talking about how much homework we got. I could not leave my house until the day came where we had to wear masks and social distance. My “prom” consisted of taking pictures with my friend and eating dinner at home rather than dancing the night away. My final goodbye to my teachers consisted of a drive-by car parade where we decorated our cars and were cheered on from afar. My graduation turned into a silent, empty auditorium allowing one parent or guardian to record me walking across the stage and receiving my diploma. I was extremely jealous that my Class of 2019 friends, just the year before, got the opportunity to experience all of the things that I didn’t. As a junior, I assisted the senior dessert and I remember how excited I was to be able to participate in it for my senior year. The disillusionment hit me when my senior dessert was driving to Crumbl Cookies, grabbing my cookie, and going home. All of these activities should have happened in-person surrounded by the smiling faces I’ve spent four years seeing, but instead I got a pandemic.
• 
  2021-09-16

  How I Adapted

  Starting a new chapter in your life can always be a little stressful simply because of the new change it brings. Coming from a farming county, I had just begun becoming comfortable moving into a big city during my freshman year of college. Second semester rolled around and out of nowhere COVID-19 immediately impacted my life. My once comfortable lifestyle I have adapted to in the big city changed back to my home where I started online classes. This was quite unusual because I had never taken any online classes and found myself struggling to learn from a screen rather than in-person classes. Weeks went by where I struggled to pay attention and succeed in the “classroom”. Although challenging, I adapted to something unfamiliar in my life and found my niche to succeed in a new environment once again. Adapting to something new can certainly be challenging for people. COVID taught people to adapt to something new in their lives. It brought people together in the community in ways that I had not thought possible. One example of this is when I found out my grandma of 88 years of age became ill with COVID. It was an unfortunate event for my family that took a toll on all of us when we first heard about the news. It became real. Real enough to worry, real enough to take action. Real enough to show the importance of family in times of pain and struggle. Our family had to adapt to my grandmother’s lifestyle for the next couple of months. This meant no big grandma hugs for 5 months until her body recovered from this foreign virus. This took some getting used to as I had not realized the real impact of COVID and perhaps did not see it as dangerous as I thought. Again, I adapted. I adapted to realize that the people around you can make situations like this less painstakingly hard. The comfort and prayers received from family and friends made it comforting to know people cared and were there for me and my family. COVID was something that impacted everyone in different ways. Just remember people listen and people are there.
• 
  2020-09-30

  The Sounds of What is Lost

  This story speaks to the ever-changing sounds of the pandemic. Sensory history allows us to engage with the past in ways the invite the senses of the past back into the story. As my partner and I were navigating all the trials and tribulations conjured into existence by the events of the past year and a half, we noticed how silent our home full of sadness and confusion had been. Gone were the overhead aerial shows, the chatty neighbors, the rattling railway tracks... Now there was nothing. Our sense of sound changed dramatically and began to represent how fractured our connection to the world was. We had to be plugged in to tune each other out. We had to stare at a screen to see a familiar face. While most things felt, looked, and smelled different, there was nothing that sounded the same.
• 
  2021-06-06

  Pandemic Thanksgiving

  Our first pandemic thanksgiving
• 
  2020-10-09

  Happy Birthday Mom, Goodbye Grandma

  It was just the turn of midnight and I called my mother to wish her happy birthday, but to my surprise the phone was picked up to deafening cries and the hurt can be sensed through the phone, something has happened. What could it be? Well it turned out to be the worst thing anyone wants on their birthday which is the death of their parents. My mom and I were supposed to go to Poland to see my grandma but now she has passed on my mothers birthday, there is no reason to go anymore as we must quarantine for two weeks. Just like that no goodbye, no funeral, no nothing we didn't even get to say a last I love you. Goodbye Grandma.
• 
  2020-06-21

  A Class of 2020 Student's Covid Story

  When I was in the second grade, I remember my math teacher telling my whole class that we would be graduating high school in the year 2020. It seemed so long ago, like this far away land that didn't exist. We all smiled and chatted amongst ourselves about how 2020 was such a cool-sounding year and we liked having that year to look forward to. Elementary school became middle school which became high school and then it was my senior year all the sudden. My high school has a tradition in which seniors paint some boulders behind our school with our class colors and have a barbecue. At senior barbecue, we complained about how we just couldn't wait 7 more months until prom and graduation, and how excited we were for them. If only we had known that none of those things would happen. I remember in March of 2020 going to Chicago away from my hometown of Baltimore to visit the college I'd decided on, and the news was a storm of talk about a virus called covid-19. My high school friends were blowing up my phone with texts telling me that we were off school for 2 weeks and how "awesome" this was. I remember having a gut feeling that this would not be "awesome." Though everything virtually shut down from March to May, my 4 best friends from high school and I were luckily still able to have a somewhat normal summer safely; we went swimming in the lake by my house and camped and it forced us to actually get some exercise. I also was fortunate enough to still make some money over the summer at the childcare center I worked at. I was fortunate in those ways, but I think anyone would agree it just wasn't the same. I remember being heartbroken about prom and graduation at first, until it hit me that this was a problem so much larger than Dulaney High School in Maryland. Bigger than the east coast, bigger than all of America. This was a virus affecting virtually everyone on the planet. That mindset is crucial to keeping everyone safe; your parties can wait. Your trip to Disney can wait. I knew my prom and graduation being sacrificed was for a greater good. I've heard that your true character isn't how you act in your finest hour, but in your worst. I'd say COVID has become a identifier for that.
• 
  2021-02-25

  Longing to go Outside

  Like people, my dog seems to miss going out to public spaces (like an out door mall, hiking, the patio of a restaurant, even the Pima Air and Space Museum) and getting attention from all the humans that pass by. He too is missing out on the social experiences that he used to enjoy before the pandemic.
• 
  2020-09-25

  A City Once Busy

  I once used to walk this street on my way to work at a restaurant. I always loved how busy it was, seeing the streets overcrowded with people who had places to be. When I lost my job because of the pandemic in March I had to go home for 7 months. At the beginning I think we all thought that things would have turned around by the time the leaves started to fall. When I came back, I went downtown to visit the restaurant I had once worked at. The restaurant was boarded up still and the streets were mostly empty, and I felt kind of empty too.
• 2021-01-31

  Suffering and Loss

  I work as an investigations contractor assigned to assist my county health department with interviewing positive covid-19 patients. I recently spoke with an 85-year-old C19 patient who was hospitalized and awaiting surgery for a brain bleed at the time of our conversation. She explained that she had fallen in her backyard trying to retrieve her feral cat's bed from a rainstorm, tripped, and laid in the rain for almost two hours before anyone found her. Both she and her late husband contracted covid-19 around Christmas, and he died soon thereafter. The hospital where he received his final treatments allowed her to visit him just before he passed, which is an unusual and gracious blessing at this time. The medical interview that normally takes 30 minutes required almost two hours and tears from both of us. When we finished, I wished her well, offered that I looked forward to speaking with her soon, and asked God to bless her. I called her hospital gift shop and ordered a carved wooden angel to be delivered to her room, as she’s a woman of faith. I had the card signed from me and the Health Dept, so I suppose I’ll find out this week if anyone complained about it. More than anything else, I’m hoping her file shows a successful discharge and recovery by now. She told me she looked forward to trading in the cafeteria food for her son's gourmet cooking, and I pray she's already done that.
• 2021-01-26

  we miss our family members

  COVID 19 has taken many lives that should not of been taken. all were very sad but we have to move on the death toll of covid will just keep going until the vaccine is spread out to the world. you can't stop it for now it has to run its corse but to prevent it wear a mask and social distance!
• 2021-01-10

  Wait, it's 2021? New Years Eve in a Pandemic

  For the past four or five years, New Year's Eve was always something I greatly looked forward to. Usually my night was spent with friends, playing games or enjoying a drink while waiting for the all-important countdown to the new year. One year, my roommate's mom came to visit and we celebrated by bombarding each other with silly string as the clock struck midnight. The next year, my friends and I decided to participate in the Spanish tradition of eating 12 grapes at midnight, one at each stroke of the clock, but forgot until about 5 strokes in and risked choking as we attempted to catch up with the clock. In 2019, which seems like so much longer than a year ago, I celebrated with a friend who worked for a dog-sitting company; as midnight came and the fireworks began, we toasted with champagne while comforting the nervous pups. Despite what had happened in the previous year, or whatever challenges I already foresaw for the upcoming year, New Year's Eve was a chance to end the year with some fun, and start the year with good company. Obviously, this year was different. Leading up to December 31st, I felt a sense of loss. In 2020 I had moved to a new state, and the friends I usually celebrated with were over two thousand miles away. Even if I was in the same state as them, it would have been irresponsible to celebrate in the way we previously have. What was usually a night I looked forward to every winter was instead serving as a reminder of the often overwhelming sense of loneliness this pandemic can bring. I was heading into the end of this year melancholy and disappointed. But then one sentence, which I saw on instagram, changed my outlook. While I did not screenshot it, it said something along the lines of this: Celebrate New Year's Eve by going to bed early, so you can start 2021 rested, refreshed, and ready to take on the year. So that's what I did. After finishing work around 7:00 PM, I went home, took a shower, read a little, and called it a night. I recall briefly waking up to the sound of fireworks, but for the most part I slept well and began 2021 rested, rather than exhausted from staying up all night. While I was still a little sad to have spent the night alone, without the usual fun activities, I think it was a good way for me to start out the year. I can use that night as a reminder that even though 2021 will still be unusual and, at times, a bit lonely, I can take this alone time to focus on myself, and what allows me to feel rested and refreshed. It's not the most revolutionary resolution, but as far as New Year's intentions go, I think it's a pretty vital one.
• 
  2020-10-28

  Pandemic Playlist: Reflections of Quarantine Life Through Music

  In March I was laid off from my full-time job of 6 years. Those first few weeks of unemployment found me struggling to stay productive and positive. With too much time on my hands I did what any well-adjusted person would do in that situation—listened to sad music to make myself feel worse. Tom Waits – More Than Rain Like many Americans, I live paycheck to paycheck. I knew that missing even one pay period would mean falling behind on several bills. I get paid weekly which means that even though I don’t make a lot of money, I at least always have enough to make it through to next Friday. Being broke made me feel like a failure. I resented my pre-pandemic life of always being so busy and going the extra mile at work. What did I have to show for it? “None of our pockets, are lined with gold Nobody's caught the bouquet There are no dead presidents we can fold Nothing is going our way” The “our” in this song made me think of all the other people who were in the same situation as me. I was sad not just for myself, but for everyone else who was out of a job. It reminded me to be grateful for the things I still had. Tom Waits is someone who I admire for his humor, but this particular song is void of any playfulness. The best way I can describe this song is to call it a cross between a lullaby for pirates and a circus ballad for depressed clowns. It features a melancholic vocal and a wearisome accordion sluggishly making its way through the song. “It's more than rain that falls on our parade tonight It's more than thunder It's more than thunder” The pandemic is much bigger than what we initially took it for. It’s poverty, depression, isolation, death… The Specials – Ghost Town The Specials are my favorite band, and this song which is perpetually on my playlist took on several new meanings for me. “Ghost Town” was originally written in response to unemployment and racial tensions in Thatcher era England. Now the song seems as though it was written against the backdrop of Trumpism. “This town, is coming like a ghost town All the clubs have been closed down This place, is coming like a ghost town Bands won't play no more” Driving around downtown San Antonio during the early days of quarantine was incredibly eerie. All the usual sights had vanished: tourists waiting at crosswalks, work trucks driving to their next job sites, bicyclists slowing down traffic, mariachis playing at restaurants, and people strolling the Riverwalk. San Antonio was dead. “This place, is coming like a ghost town No job to be found in this country Can't go on no more The people getting angry” The harmonized ghostly screeches in the chorus set the spooky tone for the song. How can we possibly live in a city that is dead? When everything was closed, I felt like a ghost--dead and unable to enjoy my favorite hobbies. I couldn’t visit friends, travel, or waste time browsing clothing stores. I had a difficult time figuring out how to enjoy life. Ginger Rogers – We’re in the Money Of course a depression era song would resonate with me. For the first time ever I had money in my savings account. This was only possible because I was temporarily laid off and able to receive unemployment benefits. I begrudgingly went back to work when my boss received a Paycheck Protection Program loan. Not only did I have to work in-person putting my health at risk, but I also had to do so at my regular pay rate which was much lower than my unemployment benefits. Body Count – Body Count I discovered this song while watching a video montage of BLM protests on Instagram. I was immediately drawn to Ice-T’s angry vocals complemented by an equally aggressive punk rock backing. The lyrics sound like they written this year, but they are from 1992—a year after the Los Angeles riots. “God damn, what a brother gotta do To get a message through To the red, white and blue What? I gotta die? Before you realize I was a brother with open eyes” The Specials – B.L.M. Just like Ice-T, The Specials have been singing about Black lives for decades. In 1980, Specials guitarist Lynval Golding wrote a song called “Why?” after he was violently attacked because of his race. In that song he seeks understanding and asks his attackers “Why did you try to hurt me?” Almost 40 years later, Golding wrote another song about his experiences with racism. Again, he takes a gentle approach by telling the listener: “I'm not here to teach you I'm not here to preach to you I just want to reach out and say Black lives matter” Cher – Chiquitita These days everything exhausts me, and I feel like I have no time to rest. As soon as Cher opens with “Chiquitita tell me what’s wrong?” I start crying. Thanks for checking up on me, Cher. As with most of her songs, I get happy when her music comes on because I know I’m about to do an ugly sing-along. Nowadays this song just hits different. “You were always sure of yourself / Now I see you’ve broken a feather” I have never felt so uneasy and uncertain in all my life. I used to be the shoulder to cry on when my friends needed comfort. I no longer have the energy to offer my strength. Lila Downs – Una Cruz de Madera Despite being a song about death, the Lila Downs version is a happy, upbeat tune. She turns it into a party song. The overall translation of the song captures how I want my loved ones to handle my passing. Instead of a fancy funeral, I’d prefer a big party in my honor. I don’t want my family and friends to shed tears, or feel any sadness. The only thing I want at my wake is a serenade in the early morning. Toots – Got to Be Tough Toots is one of those artists who radiates positivity. It’s hard to be in a bad mood when his upbeat tempos and powerful, soulful voice booms through the speakers. I saw him perform live a few years ago and watched him with awe. He would step away from the microphone and continue singing at an impressively loud volume—his voice filling up every corner of the auditorium. I was pressed up against the stage because he motioned for everyone to get closer. Toots came over to me several times and squeezed my hand and sang directly to me. In those moments I felt so happy and lucky to be alive. My best friend was right next to me and we both had tears in our eyes. How lucky we were that this Jamaican icon came all the way to perform for us in a stuffy San Antonio venue! We swore that we would see Toots again. I was excited when Toots dropped his new single “Got to Be Tough” earlier in the year. It meant that a tour would follow. The song itself was also a great comfort. “Got to be tough when things get rough You got to be tough and this is a warning You got to be smart, living in this time It's not so easy to carry on” Sadly, Toots passed away from Covid-19 two weeks after his “Got to Be Tough” album was released. Listening to the title single doesn’t bring me much comfort anymore. It makes me think of how excited I was that I was going to see him next year. Now it just makes me nostalgic for the days when we could go to shows and experience a more intimate connection with music. Nothing beats bonding with thousands of strangers who are singing, crying, and dancing to the same music as you. The song makes me miss being as happy as I was that day Toots held my hand and sang to me.
• 
  2020-03-18

  Farewell to Edinburgh

  I was on exchange in Edinburgh in the first half of 2020, and was forced to return home to Melbourne 3 months early. This was an incredibly sad and confusing time, where so many of my plans and dreams for the rest of exchange were scuppered. Things moved at a breakneck pace. My first exchange friend decided to leave Edinburgh on the 12th March, and by the 18th March I was flying home to Melbourne, having made dozens of rushed goodbyes in the previous few days. This object is a farewell post I made on Instagram, with 10 photos with my friends in Edinburgh. It sums up the mixed emotions I felt in those days - sadness, fondness, nostalgia, gratitude.
• 
  2020-03-13

  Plans Drastically Changed

  I was on exchange in Edinburgh in the first half of 2020, and due to return to Melbourne at the end of June. As borders began to close and Australian government travel advice changed, it became apparent that I'd have to return home some months early. This text exchange with my mother is the first time I flagged my intention to leave early, and captures the rapid pace at which events and plans were changing. HIST30060
• 2020-03-16

  Silence at School, March 2020

  This is a true anecdote about my experience as teacher during the pandemic, and the sensory experience by which I recall these events. I am a teacher at a middle school in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. In winter of 2019, I was aware of the coronavirus, which was something my students often joked about. For instance, if a child was out sick one day, the students would say the he or she had coronavirus, and everyone would laugh about it. It was funny to them at this time, because the virus was something that was mostly contained to places outside of the United States, and everyone thought it was preposterous that there was so much speculation about it on the news. My students engaged in speculation as well, and many of them concluded that it was actually a big cover-up for a zombie plague, and they would try to determine if I or their peers were also zombies in disguise. I recall hearing them laugh about it in the class, and I especially recall the return of one of our students to class after she had been out from the flu. I remember them asking her if she was a zombie, or if she had eaten bats before she got sick (remember, these are middle-school kids). Winter passed pretty much as usual, and cases began to occur in the US early in 2020. It was still seen as no big deal, generally. In March, we started to hear news stories about the virus in Winston-Salem. Some people claimed to know people who knew people who were related to someone with the disease in Greensboro. More and more cases began to appear, but it still seemed like something distant to us. Gradually, the sickness moved from Greensboro to Winston-Salem. I caught a cold in March, and by the end of the day on a Wednesday, I was feeling pretty bad. I told my many bosses that I would be out of work on Thursday, and on Thursday evening, I called out again. The first day that I was out sick, the school district had decided to close down the schools until further notice, starting the next day. I never got the chance to tell my kids goodbye, which was very painful, as we were all close and we had such a good experience in my class. Today, in October of 2020, I still haven’t seen any of them, as my school district is currently closed for in-person school. I wish very badly that I had the opportunity to say goodbye to them. Those are the events as they occurred chronologically. I will now recall the sounds that constitute my memory of the time. To begin with, my school is loud—our students are beyond unruly. I can recall the sounds of the end of a regular school day: raucous laughter, shouting, cursing, threats, insults, loud rap music, and the sound of me flipping the switch to cut off the overhead lights as we prepared to exit the classroom and make our way to the school buses. Then comes the sound of the announcements overhead, which no one can hear over the students, then the prolonged loud and dull tone of the "bell" which signals the beginning of the stampede to the buses. A chorus of shouts raises immediately—a proclamation of victory and freedom. It is exuberant. What follows is hundreds of footsteps on linoleum tiles, backpacks shuffling as kids adjust them on their backs, more yelling, screaming, and swearing, the sounds of an occasional "runner," who knocks the other students down to get to the buses, a teacher shrilly, piercingly yelling at him to go back and "try again", and reminding him that "you will not go up these stairs unless you can walk up them!," a muttered "f---you, b----," from a male voice that is just about to begin deepening as he turns around to try again, and so on until we get to the buses, load those kids up, and ship them out. Going to my car every day after work is over, my ears ring as I sit in the silence of my car with the doors shut before starting the engine and making my way home. I often sit for just a minute or two and enjoy the silence before departing, but the ringing in my ears gets uncomfortably loud, and I finally turn the car on and leave. When I go back to school on the Monday following my sick leave, the difference is remarkable. The school district has instructed us to come in safely, get whatever we need from our classroom that we require to work at home, and leave as soon as possible. Teachers are strictly instructed to only walk directly to and from their classrooms to their vehicles, not to visit with their friends, etc. Everyone is in their classroom, working quietly. The only sounds I hear as I walk down the halls to my room are the hum of overhead fluorescent lighting and my heels striking the linoleum tiles, echoing off the walls and rows of lockers. I hear my key turn in the lock of my classroom door, the flick of the switch to on, more humming fluorescent lights. Shuffling papers and sliding metal desk drawers and file cabinets come next. With a handful of papers in my arms (I travel light), I cut off the lights—the humming stops—and my heels strike the linoleum tiles until I open the exit door, walk across the parking lot, and leave. This time, the silence of my car is nothing extraordinary. Gone are the shouts, the yelled jokes, the subsequent laughter, the retaliatory swearing. Also gone are the kids coming up to me to just say "hey," do one of the complex handshake rituals we have worked out, and to ask me if they can have a dollar for a cookie in the cafeteria, which is a request that I have obliged so often that I will count it as a charitable donation on this year's tax return. On that last day in the school building, there was no sound of a kid coming up to me to tell me how well he did in last night's basketball game, and how poorly his best friend did by comparison, or a girl walking up to tell me that an unpopular teacher has once again worn ugly clothes to work, and that her shoes don't match either—middle school students pay a lot of attention to these things. Put simply, those are all happy sounds. They are the sounds of kids doing what kids do in 2020, saying the things that they say, and teachers managing the best they can. The sound of kids coming up to me to talk are the sounds of acceptance—acceptance of a teacher into their lives, who is usually the categorical enemy of the student. I'm glad to be an exception. These are the pre-Covid sounds. What follows conveys emptiness. The sound of echoing footsteps rebounding from the walls demonstrates how vacant the hallways are. The fact that I can hear the overhead lights hum is amazing in its novelty. The chatter of students is all gone, the desks, empty. For a teacher who loves his students, the sounds that follow the March arrival of the pandemic are the sounds of loneliness.
• 2020-08-20

  Helping my little brother move in

  Starting college can be hard at any time, and it's even harder for kids starting school during the pandemic. Since only so many people are allowed to help people move in, my brother had to pick between my mom and myself to be the last person to see him the night he moved in. He picked me, and my mom told me over the phone that she cried. Not being able to visit him has been hard because I don't even know how he's feeling during all of this. Being seperated from him because of coronoa for the first time this summer is horrible, and I know there are so many others out there separated from their loved ones because of Covid-19, as well. My brother and I hung out in each other's rooms all day over the summer, and now we can only see each other by appointment. I just hope my brother's first day of college was alright.
• 
  2020-08-17

  Anonymous Oral History, 2020/08/17

  This story shares my experience during COVID and how my life was different after COVID.
• March 25, 2020

  COVID Share Your Story #RITtigers #8, Hospitality and Tourism Management Major's Point of view

  Firstly, this weird situation caused sadness. Sadness that my last dance performance was canceled, my last volleyball nationals was canceled, and of course commencement. This was supposed to be a year of celebration. Now, I am finding ways to be thankful for all of the memories I’ve created. While the grief still lingers and will for a while, I am learning how strong I can be. I’ve been doing DIY projects, going on walks, and trying to look towards the future. If I could give a message to myself at the start of this semester, what would I say? Take in every moment and don’t wish your senior year away. The complaints about schedules and school work are not worth it.
• 
  2020-03-13

  Corona Doesn’t Spare Health Care Professionals

  Two intensive care professionals comfort each other in the halls of an ICU in a hospital in Cremona, Italy.
• 
  May 2, 2020

  Plague Journal, Day 50: Feeling very Brooklyn

  I'm keeping a Covid-19 journal. The most recent entry discusses Brooklyn's motto; the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake; the uncertainty that forms the foundation of CoronaWorld; and our latest and best edition of NYC's nightly 7 p.m. cheer for front-line workers.
• 
  2018

  Jewish Melbourne - Applesauce In The Meatloaf

  An unveiling of a dear friend , an unexpected lesson learned, and the value of every day.
• 
  2020-04-06

  Hopper Life Filter

  I have included this photo as it reminded me so strongly, on the night I took that photo, of Edward Hopper’s Nighthawks (1942). For some reason I have always found the colour palette and story of that particular painting to be really soothing and calming, and it has always been one of my favourite painting for that reason even though by genre and artist it falls well outside my usual area of interest. I remember reading something years ago which described the scenes depicted in Hopper’s artworks in this period as depicting liminal social spaces, characterised by public spaces designed for crowds (cafes, hotels lobbies, restaurants etc.) which are nearly empty and in between phases of activity, and this whole year has felt like one giant Hopper painting that I can’t escape from. I looked at a bunch of his paintings again whilst deciding what to say about this moment, and the painting Automat (1927) is one I have always identified with in a really positive way being both rather introverted and a ritual tea drinker. When I was looking at his paintings again and saw it however, I felt such a strange rush of both sadness and anxiety and I can’t help but feel like my enjoyment of Hopper’s paintings in this period has been ruined forever, though hopefully my feelings about the paintings will swing in the opposite direction again as I age and change myself, as great art is wont to do.
• 
  2020-04-08

  How will this moment be seen in the Future?

  This is a tweet reflecting on what it may be like explaining to people in the future what it was like living through Covid-19. The tweet also wonders what impacts this event will have on us. #HUM402
• 
  2020-05-08

  Crushed Endeavors? Learn Adaptability!

  *Judy Ortega, Marymount University
• 
  2020-04-29

  Dear Corona 1.0

  An open letter to COVID
• 
  2020-04-13

  COVID 19 Journal: 04/13/2020

  COVID 19 Journal by Kaitlin Whalen written 04/13/2020
• 
  2020-04-04

  My little brother

  His facial expression is sad and the fact that we are in a desolate area; no one is around.
• 
  2020-04-08

  PANDEMIC 2020

  Feelings concerning people who have the COVID-19 virus.
• 
  2020-04-09

  Goodbye

  the sadness of not being able to be in the same room with someone as they are claimed by this virus
• 
  2020-03-20

  The Twelve Days of Quarantine

  Lyrics for "The Twelve Days of Quarantine", sung to the tune of "The Twelve Days of Christmas"