Items
Mediator is exactly
Mental Health
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2021-10-05
The Road Rager
It was late October 2021. The quiet and muted reactions to my provocative liberal bumper stickers on my Toyota Prius became louder and louder as the pandemic restrictions concluded. I was drinking my kale smoothie when I heard loud shoutings while waiting for the light to turn green. I immediately felt fear as I thought a violent incident was happening outside. I looked to my right and left and noticed an angry truck driver. As I pulled my window down, I thought about how much life had changed during these last two years. Folks crippled with COVID anxiety and forced inside had returned to the jungle that is car traffic. The result? Anger at the other side. Anger at those they deemed responsible for their restricted life. Anger at those who they believed were trying to muzzle and isolate society. The noises subsided, and I noticed I had just thrown my medium Burger King Drink at the car. Was I the angry road rager? Yes. -
2020-03-05
Germs and Touch: Contact OCD during the pandemic
The pandemic, rather the first 5 months, was debilitating for my mental health. I suffer from a type of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) called "Contamination OCD". This could also be known as germaphobia. When the pandemic began, I began to be cautious. I would slide my sleeves over my hands to open doors at the college I was attending. I stopped touching things directly. For years I already practiced this in the bathroom, such as not touching stall locks before using the toilet or always washing my hands before and after I went. Due to medical issues, my doctors advised me to truly quarantine for 30 days or more. This sent my anxiety into a severe shock. I truly, genuinely did not leave my home for 30 days. There may have been a few trash outings but I did not go to the stores or see friends; nothing. It is hard to describe how my touch was affected, especially if the reader does not understand contamination OCD. An example that truly became a problem for me is Amazon packages. For everyone else, Amazon was still running and this allowed everyone to still have fun; to still live. For me, any package I took in, I used gloves. I would not touch the box. In my mind, the carrier could have had COVID, which would be outside the box. Inside, the handler could have coughed on the item as well. Even the manufacturer could have contaminated it. I cut trash bags in half and laid my items on them as I carefully dissected each one. Anything that came into my home, groceries too, was wiped down with bleach or Clorox wipes (if I had them). Amazon packages were quarantined for 10-14 days in a cupboard so the alleged virus would die and then I could use it. I remember how dry my hands were from washing 20 times a day, at least. The way the bleach would hurt my hands if I forgot gloves. Clorox wipes were familiar and on ration as I cut each one in half to make them last. The gloves I had were the last box in my city after searching for a whole day. I had tickets booked to Seoul, South Korea the first week of March 2020...which was obviously cancelled. For me, everything was dirty until I got to it. Even then, I barely trusted it. My couches, handles, walls, phone, laptop, window, groceries, bags, clothing, and more all went through cleaning as they came into my home. I would never sit on any furniture in "dirty" clothes from the outside. I had to shower and throw them in the wash. My mind was obviously anxious and ill. While I have severely recovered and pushed those limits, I still find myself holding onto those habits, knowing the risk is still out there. My hands still dry out from washing and I use hand sanitizer too much. I haven't had COVID yet, so I am holding out. -
2022-07-02
Taking Care of My Grandma During COVID
This is a story of taking care of my grandma during COVID. A lot of the time I was employed as a caretaker for my grandma overlapped with the height of COVID. -
2022-05-26
Tucker Carlson tries to link Uvalde massacre to COVID "lockdowns" while rejecting gun restrictions
This is a news story from Salon by Meaghan Ellis. This is an opinion piece on what this author thinks about Fox News contributor Tucker Carlson and his approach to the shooting in Texas. The news story says that Carlson claims the lockdowns increased mental illness cases. Whether this is true remains to be seen, but from my own experience with lockdowns, I did have trouble adjusting. I had at least a few mental breakdowns over feeling like a prisoner in my own home. I don't think the lockdowns would trigger everyone into becoming a potential mass shooter, but I do not think they were healthy for many people either. People need human contact regularly, and being cut off from that and only having social media or very few people to see in-person would feel isolating. I think mental health is not paid attention to enough by public health officials when it comes to lockdowns. Mental health is still part of overall health. I do understand why the lockdowns happened, but I think many went on too long, which has had a bad effect on society. It is obviously not the only reason someone would have a mental illness, but for people that already did have mental issues, it made them worse. I have high functioning autism and without a good support system, I'd possibly be doing way worse. -
2020-05-01
Background Noise
From 2005 to 2020, I was a police officer. My life was hectic and noisy. I carried two mandatory work cell phones everywhere I went, 24 hours a day, which rang, beeped, and chirped continuously. A police radio was on in my house, in my car, or in my ear, every hour of the day. In my world, people were always talking, at work and at home. I resigned from my position in April of 2020, just as the COVID lockdowns were coming into effect. I suddenly found myself with nowhere to be due to no longer having a job and having minimal to no contact with others due to the lockdown. Being an avid flyfisher, my days became about spending most of my time on the river alone. This was also not normal, as I am also a flyfishing guide, and am used to fishing with other people, who are usually talking to me, but due to COVID, I no longer had clients. The constant of my life went from hearing people talking (and yelling) and devises making noise, to the sound of the rushing water of the river. I soon found improvements appearing in my life. I began feeling better, sleeping better, eating better, was able to focus more, and had a much more positive attitude. All of which were side effects of being on the river everyday by myself. The COVID pandemic was an opportunity for people to re-connect with nature unknowingly, as outdoor activities were their only choice of recreation outside of their homes. Due to outdoor activity being the only option for recreation, people learned, or remembered in some cases, the value which nature can add to life, as well as how simple it is to take nature for granted. The pandemic forced people back into nature, which re-awakened (or maybe awakened for the first time) the special relationship between the human senses and nature. -
2020-05-23T09
Sampling a dystopian world
We lived in a very town in western Illinois as the pandemic arrived in America. Covid-19 seemed abstract until circumstances caused us to travel to a major international airport. The eerie quiet, in place of what should have been a noisy, madcap atmosphere, elevated sounds I normally would not have heard. It was as if a scene from a science fiction film had jumped off the screen and into my life. The experience had a nightmarish quality that has stayed with me two years later. -
2020-05-26
Reyes_Gia_
C19OH -
2022
Teacher Burnout is Real
826 National is a non-profit organization focused on helping students with their writing skills. In this post, they highlight statistics related to teacher burnout and stress during the second year of the pandemic. One of the most alarming statistics is that 90% of teachers that participated say that teacher burnout is a serious issue. The pandemic has exacerbated the stress put on educators and they have received little support in return. -
2022
Not a Normal Year for Teachers
This post shows an example of teachers supporting each other through the end of the 2022 school year. In many different places, people are acting as if life is "normal" again. Schools are not requiring masks or sanitation procedures, school is in session like normal, in-person assemblies, activities, and sports are occurring. However, teachers can definitely tell that everything is not normal, and our job continues to be increasingly more difficult. -
2022
Teachers are Tired
Now that we are ending the 2022 school year, many people have "returned to normal". Most students no longer wear masks in schools. However, we are still working through the pandemic. Teachers are still at risk for contracting COVID and are navigating the severe behavioral problems of students. With summer approaching, everyone is looking forward to a break from an extremely stressful year. -
2022-01-10
Criticizing Teachers
Even before the pandemic, many teachers have felt that they are underappreciated. During the pandemic, the number of responsibilities on teachers increased. They have been forced to teach during a health crisis, putting themselves at risk. When teachers are sick, the remaining teachers are forced to pick up the work without any empathy if they are not able to fulfill all obligations. The expectations have increased as teachers are also battling increasing behavior issues. -
2021-09-08
How the Pandemic Has Changed Teachers' Commitment to Staying in the Classroom
According to the article, there was a 16% national turnover rate for teachers before the pandemic. A survey given in January 2021 shows that almost 25% of teachers stated that they wanted to leave teaching. Pre-pandemic surveys and surveys given during the pandemic also show that less teachers believe that they will stay in education until retirement. The pandemic has required that teachers maintain the same responsibilities, while also piling on constant communication with parents (even without a response), social-emotional lessons, plans for asynchronous and synchronous learning, teaching students virtually and in-person at the same time, keeping up with changing health and safety regulations, and having to deal with increasing behavior issues. -
2022-04-22
Teachers Are Calling It Quits
Before the pandemic, teachers already experienced a job where they are overworked, often underpaid, and underappreciated. This article details rising frustrations by teachers during the pandemic and the subsequent leaving of many people from education. -
2021-11-14
Emotionally Exhausted Teacher
This item is a screenshot from a Twitter account known as the Diary of a COVID Classroom Teacher. This account's response to a picture about children with big emotions shows the frustrations that many teachers are facing during the pandemic. Many students have struggled due to the lack of routine and disruptions in their lives caused by COVID-19. Throughout the nations, behavior issues are being seen. Teachers are struggling more than ever while they try to help these students who are acting out while also staying on top of their other responsibilities. -
2022-01-08
Frustrations of a Teacher
The item is a screenshot from a Twitter post of someone known as "Diary of a COVID Classroom Teacher". For their post, they had edited a motivational photo to question how to handle a toxic person if they are in your classroom. This post expresses frustrations that are shared by many teachers during the pandemic. With many schools being entirely in-person for the first time in two years, teachers are experiencing a huge amount of behavior issues, most likely caused by lack of routine and social/emotional growth during this time. -
2020-07-14
Love in Covid 19
My roommate and I agreed because we felt that owning a puppy would help us cope with being confined at home, but then my buddy stated she would not return and hoped that we would adopt it immediately. After a year, my roommate unexpectedly informed me that he wanted to get a large dog. My roommate, by the way, is more scared of dogs than I am, but after a year of getting along, he has progressively become less afraid of dogs. So we went to the Pima Animal Center's kennel in search of a suitable dog, eventually settling on a Belgian Shepherd. Having these two dogs has brought both delight and stress to me and my housemates. -
2022-05-08
Depression and Nature
The Covid-19 pandemic has been a low point in my life. The incredible isolation felt by so many has certainly not been lost on me. Indeed, I like so many had to place my life and plans on pause. From a lost Study Abroad trip to Ireland to putting off graduate school, covid-19 has fundamentally reshaped my life in a very negative way. Like so many people, I became deeply depressed and anxious about this new world when the old world had begun to look up for me, personally. One of the ways I learned to cope was nature. Living in Arkansas, or the "Natural State" I am surrounded by immense beauty. Fresh air, rolling hills, an abundance of green and vibrantly colored flowers allowed me to find and reflect on the natural world around me. In a way, nature has a way of providing consistency and stability in an every changing world. Spring is a time of tremendous rebirth, and I have included a picture of some flowers that have just bloomed. Indeed, this representation of rebirth demonstrates an optimism that the world will move beyond Covid-19 in a hopefully positive direction. -
2020-11-26
Thanksgiving 2020
This was the homemade stuffing I made for Thanksgiving of 2020. Due to social distancing my family had in order to protect people, my extended family ate at two separate locations. For me, that meant going to my parent's place next door and dining with my aunt and uncle. My grandparents had their own celebration with other family members. One interesting twist to this was that we all ended up eating the same food between both houses because it was split up. This is why I ended up making a lot more stuffing than I normally would for Thanksgiving. In addition to this, I brought over some homemade cranberry sauce and homemade jam. I had learned to make canned jam during 2020, and I had some leftover to give. Everyone enjoyed the food I made and my aunt said it was some of the best stuffing she ever tasted, and she isn't really a big fan of stuffing. Sadly, the stuffing was not enough to ease tensions on the politics happening at the time. Other parts of the day included my family getting into a political discussion on the 2020 election. I had different views on it than my family did, so I left once that started. Later on in the evening, me and my husband went over to my in-laws. My sister-in-law was sick with COVID, so my father-in-law gave her food from the evening for her to take home. I was bummed about that, but people did not want to take their chances of getting others sick, which I understood. My father-in-law invited someone that year from Egypt for the occasion. It also turned into a political discussion there. I felt more comfortable voicing my opinions there than I did with my immediate family, but it was still draining. It made an otherwise okay evening into something that I don't want to think about. 2020 was a hard year for many people, and the election being so close to Thanksgiving made it very awkward. It has toned down since then, but I think people being locked down and exposed to constant social media and news coverage made it harder for people to actually discuss things. I think it's a good thing to be informed, but I do not believe the information overload many dealt with during 2020 was healthy. It even took a toll on me, as it made my mental health worse. Between the lockdowns, protests, and election, it was hard for me to take all at once. My only real solace was school and my husband, as both forced me to think of things not happening at the very moment. As a history major, I find it easier to think of events in the past than I do the present at times. It's why I really like the medieval period in Europe because it is far enough removed from the current era, so I am less likely to get heated about some of the topics brought up. With current events, I need to take a break at times. It was very obvious that the Thanksgiving from 2020 was not something that really made my mental health better. I enjoyed the food and the company, but I had a hard time wanting to discuss politics with people that I interact with regularly. It's one thing to discuss with strangers I might never see again, but completely another to talk about it with people that you need to interact with daily. Now that things are back to normal, for the most part, the tensions are not as high. I find myself being able to discuss politics again with some family members without it going badly. Overall, I would say that Thanksgiving 2020 was a good social experiment on how much overexposure to media and lockdowns can be detrimental to personal relationships. Seeing things behind a screen too often and being away from others takes a toll on humanity. This is why I was so glad when things started opening up again because people need to be out more and with others. As much as technology has helped us communicate, it still can't make up for the human interaction everyone needs. My own mental health has been much better since the ending of the restrictions and I don't want to go back to them again. -
2020-07-08
Motherless Immigrante Through Covid-19
Before the covid-19 pandemic, I immigrated with my father to the U.S. after my mom's death. It was a fresh beginning, I was living like in a dream, exploring, and being mesmerized by how beautiful and advanced LA is. However, one day everything changed and a lockdown that was supposed to last for 2 weeks, ended up lasting more than a year. At first, it was fun. I was looking at the positive side, doing times I haven't done in a while, watching movies and shows with my dad was incredible fun. However, with time my dad started to worry because he lost his job and did not receive any type of help. He eventually find a job for the summer, but I had too much time by myself that everything I could do was miss my mom. There were days that I didn't see my dad for the entire day because he needed two jobs to be able to pay our expenses and his dad's expenses outside the country. I started to get depressed. School started again but my cheerful character and interest in school never came back. Now, I feel like I am in airplane mode all the time. -
2022-04-29
Depression during a Pandemic
The COVID-19 pandemic has been one the hardest things for me to deal with. I suffer from depression and often combat this by spending time with friends and family. Before the pandemic I would often spend my weekends with friends and visit my family after work on half of the weekdays. Throughout the pandemic, until recently it has been rather unacceptable to spend time in close contact with others. In the being of the pandemic during the first shutdowns and mandates I struggled deeply with having to stay home all the time. I became quite depressed and would often just sleep through my days off. I tried to do virtual hangouts with my friends and family, but it just wasn’t the same. I ended up planning socially distanced hangouts with my friends, often picnics/lunch in the park 6 feet apart. This really helped me because I was able to socialize with them in person. As the pandemic progressed, and I wasn’t able to see friends nearly as often as before I became more comfortable with being alone. I started to find the things I enjoyed doing on my own. I took time to really work on some of the issues I had been avoiding. I used the time I was forced to be alone in a productive way. Although the pandemic challenged my way of living, I still found a way to grow. Now that we are starting to get a better handle on the virus, life is slowly starting to return to what it was before. With the release of vaccines I have been able to start seeing my friends and family again. With the lower rate of cases a lot of the business I used to visit are reopening. As we start to return to “normal” I’ve found my new normal and I quite enjoy my alone time, just as much as the time I spend with others. -
2022-04-29
Social Drought
Social Drought is a text story about how the pandemic erased all hopes of maintaining an active social life and how I had to find ways to fulfill my need for social interaction. -
2022-04-29
Dementia and Covid
Over the last two years, being away from people, and having to social distance, I have still taken care of my grandfather. He has Dementia. Now that things are starting to get a little better, and a lot of people have been vaccinated, I have been able to have him come stay the night at my house every Friday. The first couple of times he was confused, but now he seems to instinctively know the routine of it all. He likes getting to spend time with my stepdad and my girlfriend, and walk outside to see the horses. Covid has taken a lot, besides the countless lives. It rapidly increased my grandpa’s progression in memory loss. Most days he can’t quite remember my name or my mom's name. But at least he is happy, he laughs and smiles, and knows that he loves and trusts us. Him not being able to have as much social interaction as he used to has drastically changed his cognitive abilities. Today is a Friday. He was pretty quiet on the drive from his house to mine. I got him an ice cream cone. No matter where he is cognitively that man will always, always want an ice cream cone. Vanilla to be specific. We used to get ice cream cones from McDonald's when I was little when he would pick me up to spend the night at his house. I wonder how many ice cream cones we have left. I hate that his memory has been cut short and stripped from him. He had been slowly declining for the last few years before Covid, but once we hit the lockdowns, it was all over. He was good at hiding it for the first 6 months or so, but in the last year and a half it has been very clear. I miss who he was, I know we all do. -
2020
How the Internet Saved My Mental Health During the COVID-19 Pandemic
Prior to the first major COVID-19 breakout in the US, I was already doing online school. I had some health problems that led me to take my senior year of high school online; this was already a little hard, as my school had many senior year traditions that I, unfortunately, missed out on, so my general motivation was already pretty low. The main thing that really helped was being able to hang out with friends in person and talk to people using social media. I remember very vividly when COVID-19 first hit. It was sometime in March; I remember it so vividly due to a joke that my friends and I made. Senior skip day happened right when the news about the virus started to spread everywhere - my friends and I started joking about whether or not they skipped the last day of high school they would ever attend. This joke eventually came to fruition; first, it was a two-week "vacation." Then it was a month. Eventually, the rest of the year was called off, and my friends joined me in the ventures of online schooling. The beginning of quarantine was relatively easy from a mental health standpoint. We were too busy being excited over the "vacation" we were given, and all the time we had to play video games with each other. This excitement soon began to fade, however, mainly when the weather began to get warm again (I live in Massachusetts) and the seasons started to change. The feeling of being trapped inside during the only time of year truly worth being outside for is pretty suffocating. It is no surprise that my mental health started to suffer, mainly in the form of motivation issues and increased anxiety, and depression that was normally seasonal began to manifest itself in the only season it usually didn't. If not for the internet connecting my friends and me, I would have had a much harder time throughout quarantine in general. Despite my mental health being worse than usual, it was not nearly as bad as it could have been given the circumstances. The horrible statistics and lack of hope for a vaccine that clouded my thoughts when not distracted disappeared while I was in my own world talking to friends through a computer screen - escapism was my main source of comfort, and I have the internet and my friends to thank for that. Eventually, the feeling of hopelessness went away. Vaccines started to be distributed, and life returned to (slightly) normal. We got used to wearing masks in public, and avoiding crowded areas, but this was a small price to pay considering how bad it was before. -
2022-04-19
GB Oral History, 2022/04/19
The interviewee discusses vaccine hesitancy and life during the pandemic without having received the vaccine. -
2022-03-07
There’s A ‘Vibe Shift’ On Reddit—People Are Sharing Heartfelt Stories Of Loneliness And Isolation Due To The Pandemic And Working From Home
This is a news story from Forbes by Jack Kelly. This story is about loneliness felt from isolation that people are discussing on Reddit. Subreddits like r/antiwork and r/wallstreetbets, a lot of these conversations are sharing details about their feelings they might not want to share elsewhere. Since Reddit allows people to submit anonymously, it gives others an environment they can give more details on subjects they maybe wouldn't tell to even their family members. Some of these discussions are about those that are single and work from home, which creates a very solitary experience. One woman, 27, on Reddit describes trying to join Facebook groups and do online dating to have more interaction during the pandemic. She says she felt a slight panic seeing her other friends get married, have kids, or engaged, which made her feel even lonelier. Others describe the challenges with finding remote work and needing support to help cope with that hardship. The lack of socialization has had massive effect on young adults just starting out in life, and it has given some worse mental health as a result. While some might thrive with being alone, others have suffered. Another woman, 32, says that prior to the pandemic, she was a 'social butterfly' and outgoing, but is now antisocial and a shut-in. She says that she lacks the motivation to go places like she used to. In addition to this, her place of employment is considering permanent work-from-home for employees, making some of those social struggles even worse. Some Redditors ended up giving advice for people that shared stories like these, such as smiling every day towards someone, or going outside for 15 minutes or longer. Simple things like this were common suggestions to help with some people's mental health issues induced because of the pandemic isolation. I think that this story helps show some of the negative effects young people have had with readjusting their entire lives, and then feeling lost once they get too used to it when things are starting to go back to "normal." -
2022-04-01
Living Through the Pandemic
One thing that really stands out to me when I look back on the past two years since the pandemic began is how much fear there was at the onset. I remember it being about mid-March of 2020 and schools had moved to online learning, all nonessential businesses were closed, and it was almost impossible to find even basic groceries. The overwhelming majority of people were wearing some sort of face covering at this point and just the act of going outside felt dangerous. I should point out that since I work in the aerospace and defense manufacturing sector I was classified as an essential worker without the possibility of working remotely. Given that all of my friends had jobs that had moved to remote work and could isolate in their homes I felt that it was too risky to be around them given that I was out every day. I think that it is interesting that this was the state of affairs when there were maybe 1000 confirmed cases in the state of Arizona at this point. When contrasted with the reality that there have now been a total of over 2 million confirmed cases with approximately 25,000 currently active cases and for the most part everyone is going on with life as normal, I am left wondering if the fear at the beginning was irrational or if the current sense of complacency is the result of a society worn down to the point of indifference? -
2021-06-27
Pandemic lockdown gives a new opportunity towards homeless mental health. A study from Spain
While the COVID-19 pandemic has drastically altered mental health, see https://covid-19archive.org/s/archive/page/mental-health, I hope that there could be benefits to mental health as COVID rates around the world drop. It is now more convenient than ever to partake in counseling services from the comfort of your room, especially if you have social anxiety or pandemic anxiety. Unfortunately, statistics are not out as of March 2022 that demonstrate that mental health is improving with waning COVID rates, instead counselors, psychiatrists, and psychologists seem busier than ever. While telehealth meetings are convenient, wait times and schedules are full of the backlog of people whose mental health was affected by the pandemic. I wanted to find an example of a positive outcome on mental health through COVID's global sweep, especially as COVID wanes. Attached is an example of a study in Spain that focused on a group of homeless in Spain that were in lockdown. "More than 60% of them presented mental disorders and within 8 weeks they were visited in person 2–3 times...Finally, 51.8% were linked to social and health care services and 37% to mental health resources, which can constitute a step forward in their reintegration and normalization." They argue that if it was not for COVID and these efforts, these homeless people may not have been diagnosed and helped. The paper concludes that this study is useful for the future because it shows how under immensely stressful situations, primary and secondary interventions worked. This can be repeated without a pandemic. While the pandemic was very stressful, it reaped some benefits such as a new focus on mental health, new methods of talking with trained professionals, and studied like this that show data of improving mental health in times of stress. -
2022-03-27
Were masks and pandemic anxiety a useful distraction towards ideas that should not matter, but did (to many)?
Like everything having to do with public interactions during the COVID-19 pandemic, social distancing and lockdowns significantly impacted "traditional weddings." Gone were the days of large weddings, dancing around mask free and hugging the happy couple. If you search the internet, you will find a large amount of information on happy couples who had to cancel or alter their plans. Many of the #COVID BRIDES stories on this archive illustrate the extreme panic of changing plans and constant change, such as wearing masks in their pictures. The pandemic altering, delaying, or even preventing weddings has impacted society's mental health and perhaps future cultural traditions in weddings. This archive has a collection on mental health, https://covid-19archive.org/s/archive/page/mental-health, which demonstrates how hard this pandemic has been on many people. The effects on mental health shows how weddings are a popular and important tradition in American society. The ceremony is a way to share your love before others, blend families and friends, and move from a "single person" to a team. When I say wedding, I mean the customs and celebration within the ceremony, not the genders of the couple. Gay marriage has not been legal throughout America long, only since 2013. The anxiety and stress of two years of delayed/cancelled weddings during a pandemic pale in comparison to the longstanding social pressure for LGBTQ people not to marry, on top of previous legality issues. There is still a large group of Americans that have the opinion that it is "evil" or a sin. I have seen and heard in person, movies, or television disparaging remarks on the idea of two men or two women getting married and/or kissing. I wanted to highlight this picture from TIME magazine as I hope it demonstrates that masks made people freak out. The idea that the officiant and the people were so distracted and concerned about the two brides either not wearing masks or being the only two kissing while not wearing masks----rather than not being male/female made me smile. I hope some of the pain, anxiety, and discomfort of the pandemic was turned into positivity by distracting people from the meaningless idea of couple's gender and that some LGBTQ opponents realized there are bigger problems in the world. -
2022-03-26
Coping with the Pandemic--A Personal Look at Mental Health and COVID-19
According to the Center of Disease Control, in June of 2022, US adults reported considerably elevated adverse mental health conditions associated with COVID-19. Out of a survey they did on 5,412 people, 40.9 percent of respondents reported at least one adverse mental or behavioral health conditions, including symptoms of anxiety and depressive disorder which were around 31 percent. One of the causes of this is due to increase sedentary behaviors and low levels of physical activity due to quarantines and lack of business operation. Over the past two years, government mandated quarantine, work from home, and online schooling has caused me to stay at home for longer periods of time than what I use to. Because of this sedentary behavior, I had dealt with the negative effects of isolation, stress, and anxiety on both my mental and physical health. According to the World Health Organization, 150 minutes of moderate exercise or physical activity is usually recommended per week, however, with working a full-time job and being in school, the question that remains is how that is possible? I have learned to accommodate these physical needs indoors, by taking active breaks during the day and exercising at home. While this does not necessarily help with isolation and loneliness sometimes, I have learned to take these matters one day at a time and not shun myself for feelings them. CDC argues that from a recent comprehensive review that the impact of COVID-19 on mental health particularly seems to affect more young women disproportionally than any other group. Therefore, I recommend any young adult or women facing severe mental health to take advantage of online support or mental health services through telehealth such as ZocDoc. It is important to highlight COVID-19's impact on mental health in the United States and my personal life because it shows how the pandemic changed the means and the ways we received mental health services in the past. As the pandemic ventures on, people like myself will continue to have to find ways to cope and receive services for our problems. Thanks to the pandemic, much of our mental health problems have come more to the forefront due to us having ample amounts of time now to navigate and deal these issues unlike never before. -
2022-03-21
Logistics in the COVID Era
Logistics and Transportation have seen dramatic changes since the beginning of the pandemic, and as such, my life has drastically changed as well. When the pandemic started, I worked for a trucking company that had grown into a major corporation. With all of the uncertainty in the world, I decided to bet on myself and leave that job to start my own company. This is how my life has changed since then, and what a typical day in my world looks like now, which is much different than it looked at the beginning of 2020. I wake up at 6 am and grab my laptop, I then log in to my load boards and post the loads I have to work on for the day. 90% of my business is done over email, so I am able to get my work started before I even start to get ready for the day. I then have time to talk with my wife as we get ready, answering emails as we go. When 8 am rolls around, I wake up my two sons, ages 8 and 1. We have family time in the morning, eating breakfast and watching the news before my wife heads off to her Law School. I then take my boys to their respective schools and drop them off for the day. At this point, if I have any errands to run I usually try to knock those out. I then head home and start bidding on new loads for the days to come. And since most of my work is done over email, I am able to knock any household chores out that need to be done for the day. When lunch rolls around I like to meet my wife for a quick bite some days, and other days I eat a simple lunch at home. I am usually able to wrap up most of my business by 3:30 pm and head to pick up my 1-year-old son from his school. When we get back home, we meet my 8-year-old son as he is getting off the school bus around 4:15. We have some father/sons time, and my wife usually arrives back home around 5:30 pm. Once we have dinner, I then get to work on whatever schoolwork or reading I need to do, and then a little more family time before bed. Since the pandemic forced/allowed me to take on this new opportunity, I am able to see my family much more than I did when I was spending 50+ hours per week in an office, with another 5 hours spent commuting. The pandemic has been awful for a lot of reasons, but as a silver lining, I hope that we have learned how to be more efficient with our time and to realize that the bulk of our waking hours do not necessarily need to be spent in an office when we can accomplish the same amount or more remotely, while greatly increasing our mental health. -
0002-03-01
SMhopes at the SMPL Teen Lounge
A variety of submissions to the SMhopes website, designed as posters and banners by Paula Goldman, and installed in the Teen Lounge at the main branch of the Santa Monica Public Library. The Library asked for a variety of hopeful messages as they begin having students visit the Teen Lounge again. -
2022-02-25
The Fall of Covid
This flower represents the growth I have attained and hope. While the petals represent the things I felt like I lost during Covid. I think it is important for people to see how Covid affected everyone. This may open their eyes or give them something to relate to. -
2022-02-22
COVID support groups
I did some heritage work for this hospital a couple years ago so I follow their social media. Apparently they’ve founded a COVID support group for people who have been profoundly impacted by COVID-related illness, death, and disability. I sometimes think that the chronic illness and disabling nature of long COVID is often overlooked. Who can blame anyone for overlooking it with all of the more obvious, loud, visible problems wrought by the pandemic? Anyhow this is something to think about. -
2020-03-22
reverse life
Since the quarantine, my life has been completely turned upside down. I wake up later, eat irregularly, and am also much lazier. At that time, I was really lonely. I don't communicate with anyone and I don't want to do anything, I just lie in bed scrolling through my phone and playing games. I study superficially and have no interest in it at all. After a while, my sleep was completely reversed. I sleep during the day and stay awake at night. Every time I wake up I sit at the table and play games until morning, forgetting to eat and study. I have lost a lot of weight since then. Only when I play games do I feel happy because I get to meet my friends online. I got to know a lot of new people, even though we don't talk much now, but the time we spent together was really meaningful to me. Although I really enjoyed the quarantine, it also made me feel very weak. My lazy life ended when I went back to school but it took me a lot of time to get back to my normal life. I feel more positive and my life becomes more meaningful when the quarantine is over. -
2020-03
Dealing with my anxiety
As most young adults my age, I suffer from severe anxiety. Dealing with anxiety daily, can be very challenging at times, especially during a pandemic. I have been fighting a battle with anxiety most of my life. At this point, I am really used to the extra thoughts in my head. I have learned to help manage it, but not completely get rid of it. I believe that anxiety has made me who I am, in a way, because I do not remember a time where I was not struggling. In 2020, a pandemic instantly flooded the world. This completely impacted my entire life. I was not able to experience my last year in high school, I was not able to be around the one person that helped me with my anxiety, etc. I was forced to wear a mask that I could barely breathe in. I lost touch with most of my friends that I developed over my lifetime. This instant wave of depression suddenly hit me. I was so nervous on what would happen next, and how long will this last. People were dying from this pandemic. I constantly worried about if the sickness would hurt one of my family members or someone important to me. Over the time of being in quarantine, I thought to myself ways on how I could relax and not worry so much about the pandemic. I told myself every day, “Everything happens for a reason”. This is what I truly believe and for some reason it really does calm me down. I am Catholic. I am a very deep believer in God. To me, trusting in the Lord is the best anxiety reliever around. Covid-19 is still around today. Without Covid-19, I would not be where I am today. Although this pandemic has an abundance of negative impacts on my life, it also had some positive ones, too. I would not have attended Duquesne University, met so many amazing people, and made a plethora of memories that I would not trade in for. I believe talking about my anxiety, especially during the pandemic, is very critical because I am not the only one who is suffering, too. Everyone is nervous about what is going to happen next. To me, this is HUGE on helping me with my anxiety. I can finally think to myself that I am not alone. I believe that people who suffer from anxiety, especially from the pandemic started in 2020, can have a place to go if they are nervous. When I was struggling, I felt alone, and I was the only person who felt this way. My story will allow people to realize that they are not alone. Everyone is dealing with this stress and anxiety that I suffered from. My story tells people that I have worries and doubts, too. The pandemic not only had negative impacts, but they also had positive impacts. Focusing on the positives, will distract you from the anxiety and worrying. My story should help prove that. My story should allow people to see and find new ways to cope with the stress. I hope my story leaves a positive impact on people who did or are struggling. Everyone is in this together, and nobody will be alone in this major impact on the world. -
2022-02-07T10:00:00
Taking Covid-19 Step by Step
My story describes the cycle of emotions I went through during the past two years of the pandemic. I try to make sense of the situation, especially with high school, and find some negative and positive outcomes from my quarantine experience. -
2020-05-30
POV: Graduating during 2020
I graduated high school in the year 2020, right when Covid-19 was growing at a rapid rate, and the world was on a lockdown. March 13, 2020 was the last day of high school for me, but I didn’t know it at the time, no one did. Senior year was supposed to be me and my friends’ last year together before we all went our separate ways for college, but the only way I could see them was social distancing in a parking lot or on face time. My mental health began to plummet, I was never one to be home, I was always out of the house. Just the isolation, not seeing your closest friends, not having anywhere to go outside the house, and doing the same boring stuff every day was so frustrating because there was nothing you could do to change that because the rest of the world was doing it too and it just was how it was. I never got to go to prom, something that was supposed to be the best night in all of high school. Events that we have been looking forward to all our lives were being taken away from us, including graduation. It felt weird to be celebrating me graduating, since we weren’t even really having school. I tried to be optimistic, I mean I worked so hard for 18 years to get to this point in my life. My high school decided to do a drive-thru graduation, where I stayed in the car and was handed my diploma, not with all the teachers or friends who helped me get there, but I was grateful to have my family. I never got to shake my principal’s hand, had people cheering for me, or able to stand with my friends and throw my cap in the air. My graduation party was the following week and held outdoors, and I was excited to see close family and friends. However, 2 days before my event that I was already kind of sad about how many important people weren’t going to be there, my extended family contracted covid. My extended family was as close as my immediate family to me, my aunt was my baby-sitter growing up, and they were unable to make it. I was crushed and crying for days leading up to it and even after, it just wasn’t the same without them. It’s sad writing this, something that I spent my whole life working forward to just ripped away. It was a true test of character, adaptability, and mentality. This was the lowest point in my life, all thanks to Covid-19. -
2021-10
The Division of Covid-19
Since the pandemic started life has definitely changed in plenty of ways, not just for me but for everyone. From the way we learn in school and work jobs to the way we interact in public and meet people. One thing covid brought that I saw prevalent in a few different aspects of my life was a new reason for division amongst people. This new reason for division is almost a political thing, where there are people that are nervous and scared that covid is harmful and then the people who do not care and believe covid is blown out of proportion. I see this division in things like media, politics, family, and friends. It makes a lot of things confusing for me because I never know which side to listen to. The crazy thing to see for me is how a pandemic can come around and cause so much separation. At a point it started to seem like it was the only thing I heard people talking about and it would drive me crazy. If I put on the news, it was always someone saying everyone needs masks, then I flip the channel and the next station is saying mask are bad and should not be on all day. Then it came to my family, my dad would tell me I needed all the vaccines and booster but my mom on the other hand told me to do whatever I wanted and did not care. Seeing all of this back a fourth throughout this time would frustrate me because it made making my mind up so difficult. This eventually even got to my friends, and I saw friends that would argue about whether people should get the booster or not, and I thought it was so ridiculous. The reason I bring up this point of division is because I believe it is interesting how everyone has reacted to covid. I also feel like it has made people feel the need to push their opinions and ideas onto other people, it is something I have seen first-hand in my life. Similar to the way Hitler or Stalin pushed their ideas on everyone, but on a very different level. Maybe one day people will just let each other choose for themselves. -
2020-03
Suffering from Anxiety
As most young adults my age, I suffer from severe anxiety. Dealing with anxiety daily, can be very challenging at times, especially during a pandemic. I have been fighting a battle with anxiety most of my life. At this point, I am really used to the extra thoughts in my head. I have learned to help manage it, but not completely get rid of it. I believe that anxiety has made me who I am, in a way, because I do not remember a time where I was not struggling. In 2020, a pandemic instantly flooded the world. This completely impacted my entire life. I was not able to experience my last year in high school, I was not able to be around the one person that helped me with my anxiety, etc. I was forced to wear a mask that I could barely breathe in. I lost touch with most of my friends that I developed over my lifetime. This instant wave of depression suddenly hit me. I was so nervous on what would happen next, and how long will this last. People were dying from this pandemic. I constantly worried about if the sickness would hurt one of my family members or someone important to me. Over the time of being in quarantine, I thought to myself ways on how I could relax and not worry so much about the pandemic. I told myself every day, “Everything happens for a reason”. This is what I truly believe and for some reason it really does calm me down. I am Catholic. I am a very deep believer in God. To me, trusting in the Lord is the best anxiety reliever around. Covid-19 is still around today. Without Covid-19, I would not be where I am today. Although this pandemic has an abundance of negative impacts on my life, it also had some positive ones, too. I would not have attended Duquesne University, met so many amazing people, and made a plethora of memories that I would not trade in for. I believe talking about my anxiety, especially during the pandemic, is very critical because I am not the only one who is suffering, too. Everyone is nervous about what is going to happen next. To me, this is HUGE on helping me with my anxiety. I can finally think to myself that I am not alone. I believe that people who suffer from anxiety, especially from the pandemic started in 2020, can have a place to go if they are nervous. When I was struggling, I felt alone, and I was the only person who felt this way. My story will allow people to realize that they are not alone. Everyone is dealing with this stress and anxiety that I suffered from. My story tells people that I have worries and doubts, too. The pandemic not only had negative impacts, but they also had positive impacts. Focusing on the positives, will distract you from the anxiety and worrying. My story should help prove that. My story should allow people to see and find new ways to cope with the stress. I hope my story leaves a positive impact on people who did or are struggling. Everyone is in this together, and nobody will be alone in this major impact on the world. -
2020-03
Growth Through a Pandemic
The Covid-19 pandemic has brought an array of challenges for not only me, but people across the globe. People have lost loved ones, lost touch with some of their closest friends, got covid themselves, and so much more. Although Covid-19 has taken a long-lasting toll on my life, it has also brought me great change in an extremely positive way. When the pandemic first started my family and I were forced into a “lockdown”, only leaving our house for the essentials like food. I was unable to see my friends as online schooling became more and more prominent. This took such a toll on me both mentally and physically. I was longing for a social connection that I could no longer get and was unable to do one of the things I love to do most, workout. Although at the time I thought it was the worst thing possible, the lockdown caused my family and I to get extremely close. We would have family dinners, play games, and watch movies. The pandemic helped me to realize how much I rely on my family, and that through thick and thin they will always be there for me. As the pandemic progressed, I got accepted into Duquesne University, and started college soon after. This was a huge adjustment for me as I am from Buffalo, three and a half hours away. I had to meet new people and get adjusted to home away from home amid a global pandemic. I had to overcome fear of the unknown and fear of the pandemic to grow as an individual, and I did just that. Through the last three semesters I have met so many amazing people and found the things that make me happy while at Duquesne. I learned to not let fear override you, and that to grow physically and mentally you must overcome fear. Across the entire pandemic I have also learned that sometimes you need to focus on yourself and put yourself first. Throughout the pandemic I got into the habit of going to the gym consistently and began to eat more cleanly. I found joy in the little things, like going to work and building relationships with my fellow employees. In the end, the pandemic taught me to always look on the brightside no matter what and to make the most of everything that is thrown at you, good or bad. Looking back at it, the Covid-19 pandemic helped me grow and become the person I am today. -
2020-04
Blessing in Disguise
2020 started out great. I finally started to like my experience as a freshman at Duquesne. I really took a liking to my classes and the sorority that I joined, and I was always busy which was a nice change of pace from the fall semester. With this, I met a lot of amazing people who soon would become my closest friends. I was having a great start to the year. However, that all came to a pause in the middle of March. What I thought was going to be a 2-week vacation turned out to be a complete change in the way we live our lives. Zoom University was a nice break but it soon turned into a nightmare. I myself am a home-body, but getting up every single day knowing that I was about to have the same exact day as the next and the next was really hard. I had a really hard time not seeing family, friends, maintaining relationships, and just trying to stay sane during this quarantine. While this seemed like a never-ending cycle that would soon drive me and everyone in my house insane, it turned out to be a blessing in disguise. While I really loved my life at school, I realized that I didn’t have much time to focus on myself. It was just one distraction after the next. I finally got to really do things for myself. I made it a habit to workout inside the house, go on daily walks with my family, journal my thoughts, and really work on finding my inner peace. During this time, I realized that some things I had in my life pre-covid that I thought were serving me and bringing value, were not. Covid really stripped down every distraction and made it clear what was making me happy and what wasn’t, and for that I am grateful. Although it came with many struggles, covid taught a lesson to myself and I think to a lot of people of how to adapt well to a situation and focus on what is important, your well-being and the well-being of those closest to you and get back to your roots! -
2020-03-16
Focusing on Physical Health During the Pandemic
The COVID pandemic of 2020 affected many lives including my own. For me, it greatly affected my ability to focus on my physical health. When we were all sent home from school to finish our semester online, the gyms closed. This drove a wedge between me and where I wanted to be physically. While I could still do calisthenics at my house, I was unable to do the heavy weight training that I had grown so accustomed to. This caused me to lose some of the muscle mass I had spent so much time trying to gain. Not only that, I also lost the one place I could go to be alone with my thoughts. While I’m at the gym, I can focus on problems inside my mind while also making myself stronger. I don’t have to deal with any unnecessary external interactions with others while I’m at the gym. While I was at home, I would sometimes find myself being irritated by my family with nowhere to go. During these times, I would end up going outside or locking myself away in my room. Since I had nowhere to blow off the steam, I could only sit there and let the irritation manifest into anger. While calisthenics were good for my physical shape, they did not help me the same way heavy weights did. To fix that issue, I took up boxing with two gloves and a small yoga mat. I put the mat up against the wall and began teaching myself how to box. This was helping. While I had to deal with the occasional interruption by my family, I finally found an activity that helped me effectively blow off steam. Still, I always knew that none of this was going to last. I knew I needed to get back into the gym in order to feel like myself again. Much like many others, I waited until the day when mine reopened again. When my gym reopened, I considered the pandemic to finally be over in my eyes. -
2020-03-28
What to do when stuck at home
Once the world shut down and everyone had to quarantine, I found that I had a lot of new found free time to deal with. Over the first few days I thought it was awesome, because I was able to relax at home and basically do nothing. After those beginning days, things started to get boring. I didn’t know what to do with myself. It took me a few days, but I began to look for more things I could do with my life. As a music major, I practice my instrument about 3-4 hours every day. I took advantage of my free time by putting in a lot of work on the horn which greatly helped my development. I have also been very interested in learning new languages. I decided to start learning German. So far I’ve been studying German everyday on my own since then. It has been very fun to read stories and news articles in German. I have also found a great podcast and YouTube channel that does an awesome job teaching German. I had also begun to exercise more during the pandemic. My friends and I would go on runs outside together. It was a great way to meet up with friends and be healthy. The pandemic was a very difficult time when it first broke out. Most people did not know what to do with themselves. There was a lot of sitting at home, watching television, or playing video games. I didn’t want to remember the time of the pandemic as a time where I didn’t improve as a person. I had decided to make these changes or improvements to better myself for when the pandemic was over. It has been a great lesson for me as the pandemic is still going on today. I have learned how to deal with difficult situations and also how to make the most out of them -
2021-09-13
Mental Health in the Eyes of a Pandemic
For years, I believed there was something wrong with me that wasn’t similar to anyone else. This “something” wasn’t easy to figure out. The pandemic consisted of trends, exercise, masks, and heavy cleaning. In high school, girls consistently made fun of me for my body, weight, and the way I looked. The bullying wouldn’t stop- I was fifteen. My mom took everything to the police. Things were dealt with. Things were okay, until they weren’t. On April 5th, 2020, while doing a heavy clean of some junk drawers, I found the red folder of printed screenshots. Sorrow began to creep up my spine as I began to cry. I couldn’t understand why people ever thought this was okay. I stopped eating. How does this happen? By choice? No, not really. By coincidence? Not that either. I kept my eating disorder hidden. I never told the doctors, friends, employers, and most regretfully, I hid it from my family. Beginning from April 5th, 2020, to approximately September of 2021, I was not okay. Within the duration of starving myself out, burning 800 calories a day at the gym, making myself throw up after every time I ate, and weighing myself four times a day, I didn’t see anything wrong with my lifestyle. It was June 11th, 2021, when I was at the doctor’s office. She asks, “Do you have any questions or concerns?” I didn’t. Well, I did. Words of anger went in and throughout my brain. I had been battling an eating disorder for well over a year and I wasn’t ready to admit it. I was always the perfect, angelic, do-no-wrong child in my family- I couldn’t let them know about this but, I also couldn’t stand to hate myself for another day. It came out… “I think I have an eating disorder”, I said as tears ran down my face. For the next few months, I was monitored. It was the hardest battle I’ve had to face. I came face to face with my parents and explained everything. They sobbed as they couldn’t understand why their first-born child refused to understand how beautiful she is. My heart shattered into a million pieces. Soon after that doctor’s appointment, I was on the road to recovery. Many people hate covid because they felt robbed of love, opportunity, and most importantly, time. If anything, Covid-19 saved my life. I finally ridded of those demon in which lived inside my precious thoughts. There’s no more “I look fat” or “I can’t eat that”. This wasn’t something that was wrong with just me- it affects millions. Covid taught me that there is no room for negativity in this world. Time moves too fast. The presence of eating disorders during the pandemic can help historians understand the impact of cyberbullying, food scarcity due to supply chain issues, etc. I don’t believe that researchers realize how many adults and children were affected by mental illness due to persistent lockdowns, isolation periods, restricted visitation, and new introductions to a virtual society. My experience offers intel to how mental and physical illnesses were underestimated throughout the entirety of the pandemic. Whether it be an eating disorder or a cancer patient, it’s difficult to watch because it seems like covid-19 patients are prioritized everywhere even if they choose not to be vaccinated. It’s a hard thing to watch in terms of priority because cancer patients, heart disease patients, etc. have less room in hospitals because people choose to not be vaccinated. With that being said, being vaccinated has no 100% guarantee of not being hospitalized but it lowers the rates substantially. -
2020-03-01
The Hardest Year Yet.
March 2020 A week before the world shut down, I was enjoying spring break in the Bahamas still joking about covid 19. By the next Friday, I was preparing for the worst year of my life, and I did not know it yet. In two weeks, I lost the rest of senior year, prom, graduation, my stepmom was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disorder which made it impossible to visit my dad, faced the fear of my mom working with covid every day despite having an autoimmune disorder herself. I could have never predicted that my entire life would fall apart so quickly. I was mad that I ever took it for granted. I dreamed my entire life what my graduation night would look like, and I never pictured graduating in our local drive-in movie theater. I carried the guilt every day of not wanting to go out or choosing to do something else instead of seeing my dad. I wished I could go back and take any opportunity given to me. At this point, I still had hope that the nightmare would end by Easter of that year, but it seemed like it would go on forever. I was scared. I was scared that my mom would catch covid and not be able to fight it. I was scared my stepmom would not get better. Everything was so unknown I found myself fearing the future. I spent months doing absolutely nothing every single day. I was so upset I could not even bring myself to get out of bed to eat. All I wanted to do was sleep. I could not get more bad news if I was asleep. Every morning I woke up I felt like there was just more bad news and I honestly did not want to know what it was anymore. Waking up every day to more life-altering news with no end in sight was exhausting. I now believe that this has forever changed my life in both ways. I do not take things for granted anymore because I quickly learned how quickly they can be taken away. I have learned to always look for the light at the end of the tunnel because even if it feels like it will never end it will. The most important thing I learned was that life is like a wave, there are highs and lows, but you need to learn how to rise again. I have included a picture of the walking trail in my area. This trail was an escape from the scares of the world. I would often take long walks on this trail to calm the anxieties of the future. It was a chance to leave the house and almost forget what was happening in the world. -
2021-02-16
A Journey for the Jab
With the start of 2021, I was excited for the prospect of the vaccines that were starting to get rolled out. I knew at the beginning that I would be one of the firsts to get it because I was a teacher in Texas, where we had only had 3 weeks of online school, and the rest of the year had been in person. That high risk meant that by the end of January, the first week teachers were allowed to get the first shot, I signed up at the nearest hospital who had the Pfizer vaccine. The first one went without a hitch, with barely some soreness in my arm in the week following. It is the second shot that was a bit derailed. The week I was supposed to get my second shot, Texas was hit by one of the worst snow storms we have ever faced, and millions lost power. My apartment had rolling black outs the first day, and my apartment became colder and colder. My partner and I initially thought to stick it out, piling cover after cover of blankets and huddling close for warmth. Then, at 6PM that night, the power went out and never came back and we were driven into darkness and the cold seeped into our bones. We made the decision to suffer the cold, icy roads, and the long journey to my partner’s parents’ house, which had not lost power. We packed up the food in coolers, feeling for what may have spoiled during the blackouts, and feeling for what remained cold and frozen. We shoved as much as would fit and headed out. The drive is normally only 35 minutes, but with no snow tires and ice everywhere, we could not travel more than 30 miles an hour. As we reversed out of our spot, you could immediately feel the tires lose their traction and hear them spin loosely over the ice that had gathered under the truck. As we began our journey, the heater finally began blasting our faces with air that slowly began to warm up, and started the long process of thawing our frozen limbs. Two hours on this slow trek, constantly worried about sections of black ice, and losing control of tires, both ours and others, but we finally made it to their home. The first thing we noticed when we entered through their door was the strong smells of hot chocolate being prepared on the stove. The next day, when my appointment was set for the second dose of the vaccine, I called and asked if they were still giving the vaccine or if I should reschedule, and was told that I would lose my spot if I rescheduled because they only had so many doses at this time and did not want to have any go to waste. My partner’s parents decided to drive all of us to the hospital. Several times on this trip, we heard the squeal and slam of cars losing control of their cars and careening into one another. We all held our breaths at each close encounter, and did not realize until we reached the hospital how we had all clenched our bodies in tension. It was not until we pulled into the parking garage that I heard all of us let out a collective sigh of relief. I went in for my second shot as the family stayed on the first floor, waiting out of the cold but away from the mass of bodies huddling to be let into the hospital. Inside, I quickly walked down the hall, not wanting to make my partner and his family have to wait too long for me, and I was gently guided through the path by the volunteer staff. Because of the cold, I had worn three long sleeve layers, and found after much stretching that it was not possible for the nurse to get at my arm to receive the shot. Feeling the burn on my cheeks in embarrassment, as I had to publicly remove the top to layers, and pull my bottom shirt over my head. The cold of the room chilled my body, and I had to stop myself from shivering. With the second shot complete, and as I headed to the room to wait the required 20 minutes to make sure I did not have any immediate reaction to the shot, I was stopped dead in my tracks when I saw my partner and his family being ushered into the room. My partner was not yet eligible for the shot, and we both had had arguments with his parents about the shots, since they didn’t believe in needing them. I later found out that a nurse had been looking in the hospital lobby for anyone who hadn’t had their shots to come up because they had 5 extra shots that would be expiring if no one received them soon. Somehow, my partner in that split moment where they were being given this golden opportunity, shouted yes for all of them, and began shoving his parents down to the room before they could protest. Once we had all piled back into the truck after all four of us received our shots, we went home as quickly as we safely could. Though I had had no reaction to the first shot, this second dose threw me for a loop. That night, the chills began. Even as the house had its heat blasting on full, and I was sitting as close to the fireplace as I could safely sit, my teeth could be heard chattering across the living room. My head began pounding, and I fell into a deep sleep an hour later. Thankfully, the cold was gone from my body when I awoke the next morning, and two days later, the snow had melted enough, and our power was restored to return home. The pandemic has induced so much fear and anxiety in all of us over these last two years, have really made me so much more aware of those around me, but for me, when I think about the vaccines, and the reluctance of those who can receive them but don’t, I think about the treacherous journey I was forced to make to get mine. I think about the cold. I think about the squealing tires. I think about how terrible I felt after my second dose. And I also think about the relief at knowing that all of this awfulness led to my partner’s parents suddenly getting vaccinated. For that alone, I would experience the fear of the snowstorm once again. -
2020
Scents of Indoor-Focused Life
When the pandemic began in earnest in March 2020, I was, like so many others, caught pretty unawares. I had heard in passing of the existence of the covid virus, but was pretty ignorant overall of the rapid spread and severity of it. I worked in a customer service job at the time, and as it happened, continued to do so through the rest of 2020, 2021, and now the beginning of 2022. While some businesses closed down in spring 2020, my workplace was considered to be essential, and so I continued to go to work everyday as if nothing had happened. Except it had, and would continue to do so, growing worse as time went on. I, always having been a bit of a homebody, immediately searched for ways to find regularity and comfort at home, where I spent all of my time that wasn't at work. I've always found the sense of smell to be very compelling, if only because so many memories can be associated with them. Getting that one whiff of a fried pastry in your own house, for example, might bring to mind that funnel cake you had at the amusement park as a kid. In spring 2020, I bought a selection of scented candles in a saga of online shopping, all of them based off some book or character from such. I've always taken comfort in my favorite books, movies, television shows, etc., and thought that extending that escapism in one more way might help me out as work became ever more stressful. I quickly discovered that this was very true, and started looking for and purchasing many more candles, a hobby that has continued to this day. I'm sure my bank account does not appreciate it, but my mental health does. I can still connect certain candle scents to days I felt particularly at peace at certain points throughout the last few years; a whiff of vanilla musk and rose wafting through the house, for example, reminds me of that day I had off in summer 2021 where I had new records to play, read a new book by my favorite author, and just enjoyed the day with my dog. It's hard for a lot of people, including myself, to find moments like that through the pandemic. My candles, and the ongoing memories and peace they bring to mind, have helped me find some semblance of happiness through the covid experience. -
2020-04
How Stuffed Peppers Kept Me From Killing My Roommates
In March of 2020, I had just turned 22. I was prepping to graduate from Loyola University Chicago and searching for a job in journalism — a notoriously tough field to start out in, pandemic or not. The virus started spreading, and the jobs started disappearing. Chicago, my once-vibrant home where people scattered like ants as the CTA trains screeched into the station, was deserted. It was eerie. The internet was swarming with newly viral recipes: banana bread, sourdough starters, homemade pizzas. I wasn't interested in those, they didn't strike my fancy. In a time of severe isolation for most, I was stuck with roommates. Don't get me wrong, we had our issues. The dishes were almost never done, and we disagreed on whose responsibility they were. But in my boredom, I took up cooking, and for once I didn't mind cooking for them as well. I was one of many COVID-induced chefs who began as amateurs and blossomed into connoisseurs that rivaled the best of takeout menus. The only problem was, I'm a vegetarian, and my roommates are born-and-bred Midwesterners, set in their ways of eating and enjoying meat at nearly every meal. But by April, I had sprung head-first into a phase of cooking stuffed peppers several times a week, and they had followed me down the rabbit hole. There were no disagreements about whether to put meat in the filling or not — we didn't need it, there was enough flavor and protein regardless. And the dishes were always done, somehow without a single argument or passive-aggressive slam of a door. The peppers were fun and colorful, Instagram-worthy in a time that lacked almost anything visually intriguing. They became a source of collaboration instead of the division that had seeped in through our 100-year-old Chicago apartment's walls, a result of being trapped with no one but each other for weeks on end. It's superstitious, maybe, but I think these peppers may have saved us from severing our relationship forever. We mended our fracturing friendships and became a family once again, eating dinner together and making sure the kitchen was clean. -
2021-04-08
Cocomelon or Blippi
In the early stages of COVID, I was in Utah finishing up my Bachelor’s. Finally, after reuniting with my sister’s family in Washington, not only did I have a hard time adjusting to the noise, I had to deal with the 24/7 nonstop routine of my nieces and nephews watching either Cocomelon or Blippi. We can’t even have a movie night because the kids will end up crying to change the movie to Cocomelon or Blippi. Night and Day, my nieces and nephews would be singing to the nursery rhymes on Cocomelon or the opening song of Blippi. Although there were times when I would get annoyed or frustrated watching the same thing on the television, I am grateful for these moments. After spending many years on my own, I am thankful and blessed to be with my family during these times. In the end, it became a routine for me and my nieces and nephews to watch Cocomelon or Blippi in the evening. Not only do I get to see their sweet smiles, but I also get to hear their cute little chuckles and laughter while singing “The Wheels On The Bus” or spelling Blippi’s name. The noise that I once had a hard time adjusting to and the overbearing sound of the nursery rhymes from cocomelon or blippi's name did not matter as their sweet laughs and chuckles filled the house every evening making COVID quarantine bearable. -
2021-01-01
Navigating my mental health during COVID- Working out and Dieting
Have you ever had a hobby that was critical to your mental health? Well ever since High School, my sanctuary has and still is, the gym. As someone who works out almost every day, the pandemic put a hamper on the manner in which I would have to work out. Gyms were closed, at the time it was winter, so it was not like I could go outside to workout. I was left with only lightweight dumbbells. During this time, things were hard for me as I felt out of shape and weaker than normal. I always felt as if I could go to the gym and block out the rest of the world and now I couldn't do so. I struggled at first, and there were times I would get so mad at the world over it. But what could I do? Nothing. So, I had to figure out what could help me get through this awful time. Which led me to learn how to properly diet and make myself the best out of the workouts I could perform. By counting my calories in a journal and still using those dumbbells in different variations, I was able to get into the best shape of my life. Now I weigh around 170 (was around 190 prior to doing this) and feel more energetic and happier than I have been in a long time. My mental health in my opinion is the best it has been in a long time. I figured that without the gym my life would go through a spiral, but it got better. This was the one time that I have been grateful for the pandemic because although it has unfortunately ruined many lives, it forced me to better myself in ways I would not have thought of prior to that. Now because of the experience, I know now that no matter what, you have to make the best with what you have and never let it bring you down. There is always a bright side to things, and contrary to belief, things WILL get better. For me, finding new ways to work out and diet helped me tremendously. I am grateful I was able to find another way to be in my "sanctuary" without actually having to be at a gym and hope others can find their "sanctuary" The moral of this story: Don't let COVID completely control your life, there are ways to battle this Pandemic and stay in good mental health. Find your method and take off with it as I did!