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  2021-01-22

  Slipping and Slipping

  School used to be a place where I would find comfort; a place to escape. Ever since the pandemic started, school has been the root of all of my problems. My mental state has hit an all-time low and I often wonder when I will become the cheery and spirited person again. Learning materials used to come easily to me but now I find it so difficult to retain a small amount of information. Now that I am a junior, I've realized that I only got to experience a year and a half of it. I am afraid that by the time the pandemic gets better I'd leave high school with nothing. As a child, I always envisioned my life to pan out to be like those in shows. That is quite a stretch, isn't it? A selfish part of me wants to be able to go live life like past generations have but that doesn't mean I will go out and risk the safety of others as well myself. The world right now is scary... Fate has a mind of its own and as people of this Earth, we will never know what it will throw at us. With that being said I find that the load of work that teachers hand to us derives my motivation. I knew for a fact that this school year would be hard but I never realized how much of a toll it would take on me. Even though this was enough to discourage me, I tried - believe me - to find something that will spark my drive again. I tried to challenge myself and reward myself to fuel my passion for school but it's proving to be impossible as of lately. Will this ever get better? It's been like hell.