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2021-03
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2021-03
Pandemic Wedding: Jon and Brittany Wolf
Walls- What things did you have to change for your wedding to happen? (i.e. limit the number of people, venue changes to outside venues, or making face masks required) Wolf-We never really wanted a big wedding so making it as small as possible due to the current world climate was something that we were more than happy to do. We had to limit the guests to only immediate family even though our original intentions were to have more people present; we just didn’t feel right having any bigger of a ceremony. Our ceremony was also outdoors so our family groups could social distance more effectively and we made face masks mandatory at all times. Walls- What was the biggest concern you had about having your wedding during a global pandemic? Wolf- It was the fact that we could not include many people that we know would have loved to have been there. Our decision to limit to only immediate family was a tough one, but the one we felt most comfortable with. We were worried that some people may have been hurt by this decision. That turned out to not be the case, we were not selective with our invites and instead only invited immediate family. Walls- Did you have any reservations about having your wedding at all? Did you have to push back your wedding? Wolf- Not really. It was pretty low-key so we were not worried about spreading the virus. We had reservations when we originally planned a larger ceremony which is why we decided to change it. Walls- What issues, if any, did you have with the vendors that you had scheduled for your wedding? Wolf- We didn’t have any vendors! :) Walls- If you had to push your wedding back, were vendors really flexible on giving you a new date/ refund? Wolf- Same answer as above. Walls- What does it feel like to have gotten married during a pandemic? Wolf- Surreal. It is amazing to have some sense of normalcy during this absurdly crazy time. The accommodations we had to make were things we never even considered before the pandemic hit. It is definitely a story we will look back on fondly! -
2021-03
Pandemic Wedding: Rachel Nichols
Walls: What things did you have to change for your wedding to happen? (i.e. limit the number of people, venue changes to outside venues, or making face masks required) Rachel: So originally I was planning on having a bigger wedding around 200 people. I wanted it to be a huge celebration but due to the pandemic My Husband and I made the decision to just have our family, bridal parties, and just a few of our closest friends. I requested that anyone that was attending the wedding get COVID tested. I also provided masks to everyone and had hand sanitizer stations throughout the whole venue. Walls: What was the biggest concern you had about having your wedding during a global pandemic? Rachel: My biggest concern having my wedding during a pandemic was the possible chance that my grandparents & any older family members could possibly come in contact with COVID. But they were my biggest supporters and assured me that all was well & that they were taking every precaution to stay safe. Walls: Did you have any reservations about having your wedding at all? Rachel: I definitely had reservations about having my wedding, for weeks I went back and forth on whether it was the right decision. It was honestly mentally wearing but I wouldn’t change a thing. My wedding was uniquely perfect and I had everyone there that I needed. Walls: Did you have to push back your wedding? Rachel: I definitely had push back from a few family members about having my wedding, it was a really hard decision to make. But eventually they came around. My wedding date was significant to me because I discovered that my Grandfather had gotten married on the same date I chose. It meant too much to me to change. Walls: What issues, if any, did you have with the vendors that you had scheduled for your wedding? Rachel: I actually had zero issues with the Vendors because all I needed was a bartender, the caterer was more than accommodating and I had a family friend be my photographer. Everything was smooth sailing. Walls: If you had to push your wedding back, were vendors really flexible on giving you a new date/ refund? Rachel: Everyone who helped make this wedding possible was very flexible, they understood the circumstances at hand. Walls: What does it feel like to have gotten married during a pandemic? Rachel: Getting married during a pandemic was interesting, before the wedding I was nervous. I didn’t want anybody to feel uncomfortable, that was my biggest worry. But as soon as the ball got rolling everything felt effortless and magical. It became a very carefree environment where everyone who was there was able to forget about what was happening in our world and just enjoy themselves. Like I said before I wouldn’t have changed a thing, it didn’t even feel like we were in a pandemic. Everyone was able to enjoy themselves and stay safe at the same time. I'm very blessed to have been able to get married during a pandemic. It’s unique and something I will be able to tell my children about one day. These memories I will hold dear to my heart forever. It was just the right people and it couldn’t have been better. -
2021-03
Pandemic Wedding: Victoria Beasley
Walls: What things did you have to change for your wedding to happen? (i.e. limit the number of people, venue changes to outside venues, or making face masks required) Victoria: I was supposed to get married in New York City for a destination wedding but because of Covid we couldn’t risk everyone’s health so we had to move it back to Florida, keeping the guest list smaller. We had COVID signs everywhere stating what people should do (staying six feet apart, wearing a mask, and washing their hands). We had masks specially made with our names and date and we had personalized hand sanitizers for people to take. It definitely was very focused on and thought about. Walls: What was the biggest concern you had about having your wedding during a global pandemic? Victoria: The thought of anyone getting sick because of our wedding really worried us but we had to just swallow the pill and pray for the best outcome. We luckily didn’t have anyone get sick and it was really amazing to get to see everyone. Walls: Did you have any reservations about having your wedding at all? Did you have to push back your wedding? Victoria: We tossed around the idea of pushing it back but after really thinking about it we decided not to because we had no idea when Covid would be over so it just didn’t really make any sense. Walls: What issues, if any, did you have with the vendors that you had scheduled for your wedding? Victoria: We didn’t really have any issues with vendors. Walls: If you had to push your wedding back, were vendors really flexible on giving you a new date/ refund? Victoria: Our photographer specifically was super understanding, he was going to go to New York with us and was completely understanding and okay with us possibly changing the date when we were tossing around the idea of changing the date and he was okay with us staying in Florida no extra charge, I think he just wanted us to feel comfortable given the circumstances. Walls: What does it feel like to have gotten married during a pandemic? Victoria: If anything it gave us a sense of relief, nobody got sick and like a feeling of reassurance that just because there is a pandemic, while yes keeping it safe, we could continue to live our lives. It’s also cool to think that we can one day tell our grandkids how we got married during a pandemic. -
2021-03
Pandemic Wedding: Sara Hamilton
Wolf: What things did you have to change for your wedding to happen? (i.e. limit the number of people, venue changes to outside venues, or making face masks required) Hamilton: My situation was very unique from a lot of COVID-19 weddings in that we were nine days away from our date when we decided to postpone the celebration. Everyone told us we were crazy and to just do it and Florida shut down less than a week before our original date. Because it was so close to the date and we already had our marriage license we decided to have a super small and intimate ceremony with 13 people including us and the officiant. Our original RSVP number was 152 people. Everything was shut down on March 22nd but we did our ceremony in my in-laws backyard. They built an arbor, put flowers everywhere, socially distanced all the seats and nobody was allowed inside the house except to use the bathroom. We did not wear face masks, but this was really before that became the responsible thing to do. Nobody got close to each other except my husband and I and we only had a champagne toast and cut a small cake before we all split off. It was so opposite of everything that we had planned that day but I am so glad we chose to do a small ceremony because we certainly did not know what the future held and we still don’t. Wolf: What was the biggest concern you had about having your wedding during a global pandemic? Hamiton: For us the biggest concern was travel and people not being able to get back home amidst the beginning of the pandemic panic. We also have a lot of older people attending and we could never forgive ourselves if anyone we loved became sick because of coming to our wedding. And as I so think we are allowed to be selfish about one thing, another concern was that it just wouldn’t be the dance party we envisioned. We are both relatively relaxed and wanted to have the “big party” without people worrying for their own safety. For these reasons, we still have not had our big wedding. Wolf: Did you have any reservations about having your wedding at all? Did you have to push back your wedding? Hamilton: We had so many reservations. How could we be selfish and have the wedding no matter what when there is a global pandemic going on? Millions of people have died, and we want to celebrate our love even if it means not having those that have supported us in our partnership throughout the years? It just did not feel right to either of us. Our dream wedding is not about all the expensive and luxurious things… it is about having the support system that has been there for us throughout the years. Without that, it is not the wedding that we want. It has been extremely devastating, but we try to remember WHY we have made these decisions. I am tearing up as I think about it. Yes, we have now pushed back our wedding three times. We had an original date of March 22nd, 2020 and on March 17th, 2020 we chose October 18th, 2020 to be our second date. In August of 2020, we decided to postpone our October date to March 21st, 2021. We were confident we could safely make it happen but come January with reservations from both of us and our families, we decided to indefinitely postpone the big celebration until the world feels safe enough. Come July 2021, we will sit down to discuss if we will move forward with a fall/winter date or if we will push back to 2022. Wolf: What issues, if any, did you have with the vendors that you had scheduled for your wedding? Hamilton: We are incredibly blessed and have had minimal issues with all our vendors. We chose to support local for all of our vendors and everyone that we picked is people that we personally know. Most people cannot say the same as us, especially after postponing three times. We only “lost” one deposit from our DJ but he is giving us a discount when we do rebook. We had to pay an extra couple of thousand for our venue (The Riverhouse) as our contract was only for 2020 and we had gotten a generous discount, but they were so gracious to us and all of the money we have put forward is being saved on an invoice for whatever date we end up choosing, regardless of if its in 2021 or 2022. So basically, all of vendors saved our money and will apply it to our new date when that time comes. This is very fortunate and we do not take that for granted, by any means. Our wedding was paid in full so with our vendors being so flexible with time and money, its taken a lot of stress of our shoulders and has made postponing multiple times a lot easier because we don’t feel pressured to move forth due to time and money. If it did not go this way for us, I’m not sure what we would’ve done…weddings are expensive. Wolf: If you had to push your wedding back, were vendors really flexible on giving you a new date/refund? Hamilton: The first time around everyone was incredibly flexible and actually gave us first dibs on a new date since we were only nine days away from the big day when we decided to postpone. Second postponement wasn’t as easy but everyone still stayed flexible. Upon our third postponement, we were worried we would get backlash at saving a date then cancelling which is why we decided to postpone indefinitely until we feel its safe so we aren’t taking a date away from another couple and not stopping our vendors from making money on that day, since we are fully paid. We aren’t sure what will happen when we do choose a new date as that will require signing new contracts but because everyone has been so flexible and generous to us, we have no problem paying extra money for every vendor we chose. We chose each vendor because we really liked their work but we will stay with all of them for how they have treated us. We will pick a date that works for them all because they have done so much to keep us comfortable and we couldn’t imagine our day without them being by our side. We have not asked for any refunds nor will we. Wolf: What does it feel like to have gotten married during a pandemic? Hamilton: I could come up with a lot of adjectives to describe how it has felt as we are closing in on almost a year since our “mini mony” as they now call it. It is overwhelming, devastating, beautiful, and happy. (Here I am crying again) On March 13th, as I stood in my wedding dress for my final dress fitting, I cried with my mother-in-law as we were receiving calls, emails, and texts left and right about people not being able to make it due to the arising concern. It was there that we both knew what was needed. We drove home and broke the news to my husband and asked him how he felt. He agreed but didn’t say much. His mother left and we cried. We cried hard; we were SO mad. How could this happen SO close to our dream wedding? It took a few days, but we accepted it and decided to do the small ceremony anyways and wear what we had planned to wear. It was the happiest day of our lives, regardless of what had happened prior to 5:00 pm on March 22nd, 2020. So, while its been one of the hardest and disappointing things we have had to go through, it has made our marriage strong, honest, loyal, and committed. If we can get through our first year of marriage during a global pandemic postponing our wedding three times, I think we can do most things. I got to marry my best friend and the love of my life and I would be so disappointed in myself now if we had let postponing the wedding stop us from getting married. The big party will happen one day and this has taught us one very important life lesson: patience. So while I don’t wish this circumstance on anyone and so many have gone through it, I don’t regret that I got married during a pandemic. What a story for the kids one day, eh? -
2021-03
How to Survive a Plague with a Disability
As I’m writing this, it is March 2021 and it’s been a year since I’ve updated this blog. Although I don’t only write about travel here, it’s been depressing to look back on my past trips and have to wonder when I could be in the world again. But I’ve been far from silent during this time. You can read many of my reflections on the pandemic and other topics over at The Mighty, where I have been an editor for the past five years. One year ago, when the pandemic was just beginning in the United States, one of my good friends posted a social media message about supporting each other during what most people thought would be a strange, scary, but ultimately short period of our lives. Part of it went something like this: My mask protects you. Your mask protects me. It’s a nice sentiment. Wearing a few layers of cloth over your face may not help you much, but it helps to prevent other people from getting sick. It’s a kind, visible act we can all do to show we care during a difficult time, to protect others who are at risk even if we may think we would not become seriously ill. It seems so simple, right? How could people not do this? But we all know what happened. “My mask protects you. Your mask protects me,” only works if the other person values your life enough to consider it worth protecting. I’ve been horrified by the number of government officials and online commenters who have viewed the deaths of elderly and disabled people as “acceptable losses” in exchange for keeping non-essential gathering spaces open. My life, and the lives of people with high-risk conditions, are more important than your trip to Disneyland. Don’t you think we want to go to Disneyland too? I’ve also noticed that able-bodied people often assume disabled people will be provided for in emergencies, and in general. They believe there are a lot of government programs and charities to help us, and that such programs are run well and meet our needs. This widespread — but utterly false — belief in a functioning safety net for “the vulnerable” gives people an excuse to behave selfishly while convincing themselves they’re not doing anything wrong. “Of course, there will be a plan to protect nursing home residents, and immune-suppressed people can stay home, so we can throw parties and go without masks if we don’t like them.” In reality, the needs of people with disabilities are often disregarded, misunderstood, ignored, and even actively opposed. We have to fight for access to everything, and sometimes end up on multi-year waiting lists for housing assistance, in-home care, and other essential programs and services. We must battle with government and private insurance to get the mobility equipment we need. We are GPS tracked like criminals if we need personal care assistants, with “fraud prevention” used as an excuse. We often depend on programs with ridiculously complicated requirements, and one missed deadline, one paperwork error, one month where we made “too much money” can cost us everything. -
2021-03
My experiences working and living in the Covid 19 Pandemic
When the covid pandemic started, I don't think anyone really knew the extent this virus would take on everyone's life and how it will potentially change the world as we know it. I have worked in healthcare during this pandemic and have seen and heard of many people dying from this virus. I work in an acute rehabilitation hospital where people come after having a stroke or major surgery and they learn how to use their bodies and adapt to their new lifestyles. My hospital is not a place where people die, it is a place where people go to get stronger to go home to their families. there had been countless numbers of people who had contracted the virus when at the hospital and eventually had died from it even though they were on the tract to getting stronger, physically. Not only have I seen how this impacts the individuals who contract the virus, but it is important to note how this virus is effecting people mentally. I have heard of many people's friends dying of suicide from being in isolation during their quarantining. I have also learned that many children who are learning how to talk are having a hard time learning how to communicate with others because they are missing the important aspect of facial structures and non-verbal language which is impeding their ability to communicate and understand others.