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scared
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2020-03-20
Life of a Retail Worker During COVID-19
Throughout the entire pandemic, I worked in retail (specifically at the "Meijer" grocery store). As essential workers, it was frightening going to work and exposing myself to illness while many others stayed home in quarantine. I went to work and was met with frantic customers panic buying everything and anything they could find - the meat aisles were empty. The bread was gone. There wasn't a roll of toilet paper to be found. Although stock of popular items was low on a national level, we still received questions about when we would be getting more shipment in. It seemed as though people were gearing up for an apocalypse rather than a pandemic. We went around cleaning constantly, wiping and spraying down every surface we could find. Masks were mandated and giant plexi-glass shields were installed in the check-out lanes. It was incredibly difficult to work alongside others who were absolutely terrified - I was worried that I would do something wrong and set them off. Working throughout the pandemic completely wore me out and shed light on who people become when they're scared. -
2020-01-01
Travel
Before the pandemic, my family, friends and I were traveling and getting to see amazing sites! This photo here is from Africa. We were able to have the luxury of going on this trip right before covid. When covid hit, we couldn’t go anywhere. Places got shut down and people were to stay in their homes. During the summer when covid started to get better, we planned a trip to Spain. A few week later I receive a call from my parents telling me our trip has just been cancelled because covid could shut down the borders and we could get stuck. To this day it is still scary to travel. When I used to be able to go and see the world, now I can’t because of covid. -
2020-07-15
Tips for Managing Anxiety in the Midst of COVID-19
A blog post from Banner Health about managing stress and anxiety during Covid-19. -
2021-10-07
Covid Vaccine Reminiscence
This is a recording I did of myself where I reminisce on my Covid Vaccine experience and the feelings it brought -
2020-03
Riding the Covid Wave from Quito to Sydney
The pandemic was declared as I was en route to Ecuador. I was trapped in a strict lockdown isolated from any other travellers. My book describes my reactions and rescue. As a doctor I was not surprised that a pandemic was occurring as I knew that epidemiologists always say it is not an if but rather a when. -
2020-10-14
Empty Chicago
Normally Chicago is one of the busiest city's in the United States, but due to the pandemic, everything was shut down and people became scared to come outside. This photo represents the emptiness that the pandemic has brought upon this typically alive city. -
2021-04-14
I Thought It Was Safe
It's been over a year since my daughter has gone to a birthday party. She got invited to one at an indoor kid's place and I had plans on taking her. She's gone to school online and only had playdates with one child ever since the pandemic began. She is not more likely to catch the virus than any other child, but, if she were to contract it, her symptoms would likely be severe and it would be very difficult for her to recover from it. My family has been very worried and take tons of precautions to protect her. We got an invitation to a private 2 hour party at an indoor amusement facility for kids. I got a text two hours before the party was set to begin saying that the party was cancelled because the family had just been notified by the school that there was an exposure to COVID-19 in the birthday boy's classroom. I am so glad the family was notified before the start of the party, but it just really hit me how dangerous it is to go to a simple kid birthday party. I immediately began to beat myself up... I had a thousand "what-ifs" go through my mind. I don't know when we will be able to go to indoor play facilities and I don't know when we will get to go to another birthday party. It's still just too scary and risky. -
2021-03-13
Friday the 13th...my last day at work
This is a reflection of the first day that Covid affected me. -
2021-03-09
#JOTPYSilver from Tina
#jotpysilver my silver lining during the pandemic was that I was able to get closer with a lot more people. I have become great friends with those who have stayed in touch, and I am so grateful for them. Having a community during the pandemic really helped me feel less scared and alone overall. Otherwise, the pandemic would have been too lonely and isolating.🤍💗 -
2020-10-05
Asian American students discuss experience during COVID-19 pandemic
Long-standing stereotypes and new pandemic-related misconceptions against Asians and Asian Americans still affect their day-to-day lives. University students of East Asian descent say they’ve felt alienated and scared during the COVID-19 pandemic. Since the pandemic began, hate crimes against Asians in the U.S. have increased and stricter regulations have been enforced against international students, particularly those from China. Since the spread of COVID-19 from Wuhan, China, Asians have been strongly connected to the virus in the public sphere. President Donald Trump has called COVID-19 the “Chinese Virus” and “kung flu” — associating Asians with the spread of the virus. -
03/10/2021
Ellen Galindo Oral History, 2021/03/10
This is an oral history of Ellen Galindo, a teacher in Orange County, California. The date of this interview was three days shy of the one year anniversary of when her school shut down. She has been teaching online for a year now. She is also expecting her first child. Her oral history is focused on her experience teaching through Distance Learning and her feelings on being pregnant during the pandemic. -
2021-03-06
This is not how this is supposed to go.
Friday, March 13, 2020, was my last full day in the office before the shutdown. We came home that night not knowing what was next. Then my sister called. Things hadn't been right for a couple of weeks, she said, and when she had been to the doctor that morning he ordered her directly to the MRI lab. And there it was. Cancer. The exact same kind that had taken our mother a few years ago. And our grandmother several decades ago. Dammit. So what do you do? You get on a plane, you go there tomorrow, and you face this thing together, as family, right? Except no. It's COVID time, and only one person was even allowed to accompany her to the hospital for surgery three days later. We all decided that my other sister should be there, since she has medical expertise and also a more flexible schedule. But yeah. Here I am, on the other side of the country, not knowing whether my sister would live through the day and not able to go be with her. It's a year later, and I'm very relieved to say that she's still with us, lasting far longer with this diagnosis than either our mother or grandmother did. Still very much in the fight. But thanks to this damned disease, and to everyone whose stupidity has caused it to last longer and be worse than it had any need to be, I have seen her exactly once in the last year. For about ten minutes. Right before her second surgery. Will I get to see her again? Who knows? We have a trip planned in a few months, if things get better with this pandemic. And if she lasts that long. It's sad and exhausting and infuriating and unchangeable. -
2020-04-20
During the War... or A Gift of Time
When the going gets tough, the tough get going... I think I understand the meaning of hunkering down and getting to work now. I have always loved creating and now more than ever am embracing its healing powers. During these last six weeks I feel like we have been dodging bullets. We have become hunter gatherers looking for supplies to combat the germs. We are obsessed with stocking our little fort with enough of everything (art supplies), to survive the war. Through it all, my husband and I have also been obsessed with creating. Me in my home studio, learning how to collage, make books, creating paintings, greeting cards and finding new techniques to immerse (distract) my self. My husband in his shop behind our house making cigar box guitars! I read a quote from J.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring, that sums up, like most things, will be our attitudes that will help us accept this interruption of life..... ”I wish it had not happened in my time”. said Frodo. ”So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what we will do with the time that is given to us.” Since the start of the pandemic I have created over 65 paintings. I need to create in order to find sanity and feel productive and not scared and anxious. The photograph is a painting I created using Rohrshadk blots as inspiration. -
Anxiety during the Pandemic
Since I can remember, I have always been a very nervous and anxious person. On my first day of second grade, I couldn’t even bring myself to leave my mom, and usually kids grow out of that stage when they go off to kindergarten. Throughout all of grade school, and my freshman and sophomore year of high school, I was always insecure, self-conscience, and very sad. It finally got better my junior year of high school and the only reason it got better is because I was on medicine. I went to a therapist and took my medicine on the regular, but I still was very anxious. I guess anxiety is just a part of who I am, and it is not something I can grow out of. After giving explaining my background with me being a very anxious person, you can probably see where this story is going. Obviously moving away for college was a very scary and anxiety increasing time. I could not sleep, eat, or smile the two weeks leading up to leaving for college. The sad thing is is that I was finally getting better, but then college came. Believe it or not though, I moved to Pittsburgh for college, and my anxiety got better. I was not as insecure and really learned to not let things get to me that used to get to me. It was March 14, 2020 where my life, and my anxiety started to go back to how it used to be in grade school and the beginning of high school. This pandemic has not been easy for anyone, and everyone can attest to that, but having anxiety and then having a world pandemic hit was horrible. I remember getting the email that told us we had to go home, and I had an anxiety attack. Because of my anxiety, I am a big planner and having to leave campus and not knowing when we will return put me in a state that I hope I never go back to. My mom picked me up on Sunday, March 15th, and that day I did not sleep, eat, or talk for about fourteen hours. I did not like how I did not have a scheduled day to go back to school, which made me so anxious because like I said before, I am a planner. We never got to go back to school and let me tell you online classes made me so anxious. I felt so behind, because going from all in person classes to all online classes is not an easy transition for anyone. Being a person with anxiety, I felt as though I was put into a world, I was not meant to be in. It felt so rushed, confusing, and honestly, I was at my lowest in the middle and end of March. I remember crying to my parents about how I didn’t want to do school because it was miserable and going out in public was so scary to me. This pandemic was publicized everywhere, and I thought in my brain, if I go into the grocery store, I will get COVID, and I know that is not true, but that is how my anxiety works. I did not go anywhere for about four months, and if I did, it would be for a drive in my car. I did not see anyone for about five months because I was worried about where they have been, and if they have the virus. This whole virus really made my anxiety worse and put me at my lowest point in my life. I felt like I did not have any friends, and I also felt very dumb because I thought I knew nothing that was going on in my classes. I started seeing a therapist again and it really helped. The fact of being scared to go into the grocery store or mall or even seeing friends seems silly. I wasn’t scared, it was just my anxiety because I wanted to make sure I did not get the virus. I hope this virus comes to an end, because I know how much it took over my mental health, and I believe I am not the only one. -
2021-01-20T12:22:00
Too close to home
I was in class on a Wednesday and my phone kept going off like crazy.it was being so distracting so I just decided to check why it was going off and then turn it off for good. I picked up my phone and there were thousands of text messages saying "you need to get tested", "go get a test". At this point I was completely confused, so I asked them what was going on and they said that one of my friends had tested positive for Covid and that I need to get tested because I'm hanged out with them on that Monday. Once I read this I completely froze, I didn't know how to handle this information. I was scared for my life, and for hers, I wasn't sure if she'd be okay. If I was going to be okay. I wasn't paying attention to class at all and everything my teacher was saying was going completely over my head. School got out and all I could think about was how am I going to tell my parents that I came home possibly with Covid. The thought of just having to tell them the news and how they could possibly react to it scared the life out of me. I didn't think that I could tell them because I was afraid they would be too disappointed in me and to scared. I finally got the courage to tell my mom and she surprisingly took the news well. My parents weren't happy but they definitely weren't angry so that's good. They told me that I had to wash everything that I have touched in the past 2 days. I was so glad to tell my parents because holding that secret in was tearing me apart inside. I checked in with me friend everyday to make sure she was ok. It's scary to see it on the news and to hear it on the radio but once it hits too close to home, it can really change your entire life. -
2020-02-05
Pandemic Observations: Unique Mask Problems
I often feel naked without a mask now. Sometimes I get the same scare of losing my mask that I get with my cell phone. It is without a doubt that masks have become an important motif in our pandemic-lives. I wanted to share some random struggles of wearing a mask. They are only minor inconveniences, but I think they provide excellence context to the current lifestyle. -Glasses fogging: Glasses wearers often find their glasses fogging up whenever they breathe with a mask on. Luckily, this is an easy fix. As long as the glasses are fitted over the mask, there should be no fogging. Sometimes the mask has to be pulled up a bit higher on the nose to achieve this. There are also sprays that prevent glasses from fogging. -Makeup: People who wear makeup often find the undersides of their masks smudged with foundation, concealer, blush, lipstick, etc. Some people opt not to put makeup on the bottom half of their faces to prevent this problem, others just embrace the makeup smudges. -Acne: many (typically young) people who wear masks for a prolonged find acne around where their masks were. This makes sense, as sweat and moisture collects in the mask. Proactive skin care, such as washing the face with a gentle cleanser or other acne-treatment solutions can alleviate this issue. I personally see this as a non issue, as no one can see the acne anyways because of the mask! -
2020-12-31
The Luck of the COVID Draw
Throughout the pandemic, my family and I have been extremely careful as to not catch the virus. My mother made sure my brother and I always had little bottles of hand sanitizer with us when we went to work or to the grocery store, my mom had multiple masks in the car for herself at all times, and my dad has been social distancing from people since he was born, so he was well prepared to sit in the house in social isolation. Being in PA, Gov. Tom Wolf had just about everything shut down from December 2020 to the first week of January 2021, but despite this and all of the precautions my mother had made sure we all took, my brother had brought it home from work without realizing it. We all realized we were probably going to get it when my brother was sent home from his new job after getting tested for COVID. Honestly, we were all a bit surprised it had not happened earlier, as he used to work at a hospital, but from there, we all started dropping like flies. My mother started getting symptoms around New Years Eve and my father followed suit days later. At this point, I was terrified. All I could think of is how my mother is immunocompromised and that she had it, and that I myself am immunocompromised and I would be next. Worst of all, when I am home from college, I sleep on the couch due to damage in my old bedroom, so keeping myself away from these other people in my house would prove to be near impossible (hence the meme saying “I need to get out of here”). Even if I would have been able to isolate myself, they all felt too sick to take care of themselves or one another, so that job fell upon me. At this point, I am running around the house, trying not to breathe around my family in the last few weeks that I would be able to spend time with them before heading back to school, while also stressing about having to go back to school, as well as having to quarantine for additional time after my family’s quarantine was over. A couple weeks in I start to feel the early signs of COVID, headaches, body aches, coughing, the works. I went to get tested in an absolute panic as to what this would mean for my own health and how it would affect me going back to school, only to get back a negative test. The headaches? I have migraines. The body aches? Well, I sleep on a couch where the cushions come out from under me while I sleep, so you tell me. The cough? I have a cat and a dog that I am fairly allergic to but refuse to stay away from because they are so precious. How I, out of all of my family, was able to avoid getting COVID despite being the college kid with a weakened immune system who played nurse to 3 COVID patients is beyond me. This experienced that COVID is really a gamble. You may have everything against you and not get it, or you may have done everything you could possibly do to avoid it and still catch it. Regardless, I will continue to err on the side of caution and wear my mask and carry my mother’s hand sanitizer with me. -
2020-11-25
My Experience with someone who got COVID-19
About a couple months ago, my friend who I had known for about 6 years tested positive for Covid-19. There was an outbreak in his school, and he got the virus from someone there. I'm pretty sure most of his family got tested, but only he had it. I wasn't seeing him anyway because of the lockdown, but I felt pretty scared for him. He had a heart condition and so did his dad, so he was more vulnerable than most. Luckily, he was asymptomatic and he wasn't suffering. His dad got pretty sick, but it wasn't COVID-19, he is ok now but he wasn't doing very well when he had it. Luckily, my friend was ok and did not have to go to the hospital. -
2021-01-11
Covid-19 Origin
Well, way before Covid was spreading, I first discovered that Covid originated in Wuhan, China by watching a video. I thought about how unsanitary that place was and how disgustingly dirty it was. I learned that it originated in bats and that it was in a "wet market". I was disgusted by this and I felt that China should shut down all of their "wet markets". Over the months, I learned more about this virus and I learned that there is another version of it in North Africa. When I first discovered this virus, I thought that it was just a virus and we did not have to worry about it. Apparently not. It spread all over Europe and came to the United States. Everyone was freaking out and then schools closed. After, quarantine started. Now, I realized how serious this virus truly is, and I am downright scared. -
2020-12-09
COVID-19
Before COVID, I was very happy, but when COVID hit, I was scared about being locked in my house. There was nothing to do and I think that this was one of the biggest struggles. Adaptation. It took me many months to adapt to living like this, and it really scared and confused me. Once I adapted, I was happy and glad. -
2020-03-22
The Run
In the beginning of the pandemic, I, like many others, was somewhat sure everything would inevitably blow over and we would be able to return to our normal lives. However, I came to unfortunately realize that we were in it for the long haul. I realized that I was going to have to start taking charge of my own life as it was essentially flipped on its back. I no longer went to school where I was preparing for APs. I no longer had my Track and Fields practices which were keeping me active and in shape. And I no longer got to see all of my friends everyday. The pandemic taught me that I would have to take the position of my teachers and prepare myself for my APs as well as my coaches to keep myself in shape and healthy. I began to study almost everyday and really developed a theme of resiliency within my life to bounce back from the detrimental effects of the pandemic. However, this story isn't about how I studied and prepared for my APs, its about how I ran and kept running the whole time of quarantine and how it led to some unforgettable experiences. When quarantine began I knew I was going to have to start taking charge when it came to my health and fitness. So, my friend and I began to run everyday at a local park near our houses. We would run through the woods and by the rivers and we just had a really good time. We were staying in shape and felt better than ever. And, we weren't just running on a track in a loop 20 times, we were exploring nature and becoming more accustomed to having to do things for ourselves. However, one day, this excitement that running brought to us would be exchanged with fear for once. My friend and I were running besides this river that we always run along. The river was quite tame a majority of the time but that day it had rained the night before and the rapids of the river were growing increasingly ferocious. We decided to stop at this one edge along the river and take a break as it was extremely humid that day. The river was very close to where we stopped so my friend decided to splash his face with some water from the river. And, without hesitation the river stepped him into its fearful rapids. I was scrambling. I didn't know what to do or what to think as my friend barreled down the river. I started running, screaming, and trying to think of something, anything, to help my friend. He was already at least 50 yards down the river and I was slacking behind trying to come up with some makeshift idea to save him. I knew there was no waterfall to worry about, however, the river was shallow rocks beneath the rivers surface were sharp and deadly. I began to run down the rivers edge to catch up to my friend. I looked around to find anything to throw to him that he could lodge between a rock or something. I began to dig up a bunch of leaves to look for a long enough stick, however, I ended up finding something that would prove to be even more useful. I found an old wooden plank. I was so scared and restless to find something so I took what I could find and threw it to my friend. And, he was able to lodge it between the bank and a rock sticking out of the river. I was able to pull him out of the river and he was saved. We were both in shock and had no idea what to make of the situation. I was scared and confused and didn't even know what to say. My friend finally broke the silence by saying the most anticlimactic phrase for that situation, "thanks." I said "your welcome" and then we both just started laughing and got up and walked back home. Evidently enough, the plank from the picture is the one that perhaps saved my friends life and is something I don't think I will ever forget. This event showed me just how unforgettable this pandemic is going to be. Like I said, I don't think ill ever forget what happened to my friend, and I will always remember the year 2020 as the year of unforgettable instances. My friend falling into that river showed me that things are going to happen in our lives that we aren't prepared for. I, like many others across the world weren't prepared for what this pandemic was going to do to our day to day lives. However, we learned to live with it and how to solve this problem just like how I was able to solve my friends problem and save him from that river. The pandemic has taught us just how unpredictable our lives can be, and just like how I saved my friend from that river, we have to learn how to save ourselves and overcome the unpredictability that this world has to evidently offer. -
2020-07-29
Australian Health Worker quote on patients
They have no one else with them. They're scared, they're frightened and it's very difficult. Quote from Female aged 52, Specialist Care Doctor. Image created by the Health Worker Voices project: https://mspgh.unimelb.edu.au/healthworkervoices -
2020-11-21
Healthcare Workers Shunned During Pandemic
This article discusses how healthcare workers across the US are being shunned by their community due to fears they may have the COVID-19 virus. This article was very interesting and as a healthcare worker it was interesting to hear the concerns of the community -
2020-09-24
Jayce, Tonia, and Keiwan tell their COVID stories
Jayce, Tonia, and Keiwan tell their COVID stories as part of the LongIslandStories collection being done at the African American Museum of Nassau County -
2020-10-28
How social justice is affecting POC
I interviewed my friend who has been affected by social justice issues that have been occurring in this country. He informed me how he has not been able to receive jobs he was overqualified for because of the color of his skin, how he has to fear driving by a police officer because of the color of his skin, and how he overall is not treated equally. He fully supports the movements going on in the country today and hopes for a better day. -
2020-03-17
The Big Flee
Early in the morning on March 17, my roommates and I fled San Francisco. It felt extremely weird leaving my life behind, but we would return to normal soon (or so I thought). As we piled our belongings into the back of a friend's car I looked around to see nobody. Not even an early morning jogger or any sign of life for that matter. In the airport we got through security in five minutes and saw around two others our whole time there. It was as if time had stood still in the city. At the time I was extremely scared, as what evils could cause a city-wide shutdown? How dangerous was CO-19 if all colleges had moved to online learning and forced every student out of the dorms? Little was known about the effects of CO-19 in March, and as I write this on August 23, 2020 more is yet to be discovered before we can safely reopen as a country. I chose to include this photo with my story as it was taken on March 16, 2020, the night before San Francisco's mandatory shutdown. It was eerie how silent the once bustling streets of downtown were. I had never witnessed something like this in my life. -
2020-03-18
Plague Journal, Day 5: Drawing WiffWaffles
As the reality of the pandemic begins to dawn across the country, I walk through Prospect Park, hear strangers express anxiety, and interact with The Kid via text and on a walk in north Flatbush. -
2020-06-17
My story on Covid-19 in Bhutan
How Covid-19 is being battled in Bhutan. -
2020-06-06
Chronically ill and highly vulnerable amid Covid-19
During this Covid-19 pandemic, we’ve learnt that some people might be more vulnerable than others. Who is high risk? I am! A quick google search shows that a person taking high doses of steroids or immunosuppressant medication can be considered as clinically extremely vulnerable. I take both. The fear is real. It has always been here but now I need to be even more careful. The lines are blurred; how ill do I need to feel before deciding that I need to go to the hospital, an incubator for all kinds of infections and an even more potential risk in catching the deadly virus? As much as the hospital is the solution, it might as well be death welcoming me with arms open. The number of infected persons has rocketing at a time, and I could not help falling sick despite not having gone out a single time during the 3-month lockdown. It was finally time to go there, the hospital! I went armed to the teeth with my mask, gloves, and a sanitiser, cautious but still anxious, and I was met with an eerily almost empty building. The place which was usually buzzing with activity at all times of the day only had a handful of doctors and nurses but no patients! It seemed like everyone had respected the lockdown measures to the letter. I was relieved and I was cared for with the staff following all precautionary measures. In a measure of solidarity, the people had decided to respect the lockdown rules to avoid the spread of the virus and had in unthinkingly doing so, potentially saved the health of many vulnerable patients. I felt safe and I still do. Caring for others is after all a social responsibility and an expression of what it means to be human and humane. -
2020-05-31
The Impact on Normal People
This is a screenshot from a video which uploaded by a well-known blogger who lives in downtown, Los Angeles. He was interviewing an innocent woman on the street about the current protests and activities in LA. The woman said she's scared and worried abut her child. I think I feel her. My mother's worrying about me everyday even though I live pretty far away from the violence. And I feel scared as well. I can hear the helicopter flying above the cities everyday but I still don't want to go out of my apartment. -
2020-04
Hunger games meme made for COVID-19
This meme shows how scared people were going out in public for things like grocery shopping, since it seemed like the virus was everywhere and out to get you. #CSUS #HIST15H